The Unfairness of Being Me
by Lily Brianna Potter
Summary: After Harry and Ginny get married and Voldemort is defeated, their daughter Lily struggles to live up to her parents and siblings reputation. She is never good enough for anyone, and the boy she is in love with thinks of her as his best friend's kid siste
1. What happened to Harry And his daughter

_A/N: Summer has started, so I thought that I would start a new story, so here it is. This chapter is kind of a character summery, and what happened from the fifth book until now. Let me clarify a few things. Kelsey and Matt are NOT cousins, I don't know how you got that. I DONT THINK A SIZE FIVE IS FAT AT ALL! I'm just trying to give you a fell for what Lily thinks._

The summer after the fifth book, Harry goes to the Weasley's house. Ron gets in trouble, so Harry is hanging out with Ginny. They are playing Quiditch, and then they put the stuff away. Harry kisses Ginny, and the rest is history. Ginny and Harry get together, and Harry proposes to Ginny on her Graduation day. They don't end up getting married until September of the next year, because they defeat Voldemort together. Their first child, James Harold Potter, was born the following year. Two years after that, Lily and Sirius, twins, were born. Two years after that, Remus was born and another year later, Molly was born. Currently, James is in Seventh, Lily and Sirius are in Fifth, Remus is in third and Molly is Second.

Hermione and Draco get together at graduation. They some how ended up together in a very small area: under the table they both happened to be eating at. Draco had chosen not to become a death eater, and to become a healer. They ended up kissing, and everyone, wondering where the two had gone, looked under and saw. Lucius disowned Draco, but Draco didn't care. Hermione and Draco married a year later, and had twins, Matthew and David a few years after. Then, five years later, Samantha came along. Matthew and David are in sixth and Sam is in first.

Ron married Parvati Patil three years after graduation. They had been going out since seventh year, but it took Ron a long time to pop the question. Finally he did, and they got married. The have three children: Jessica, who is in first year, Anthony, who is nine, and Jacob, who is six. Parvati is pregnant with another baby.

The rest of Ron's brothers married, except for Fred and George. Fred has been going steady with Angelina Johnson for quite sometime, but there is no talk of marriage. There is a total of ten cousins among Percy, who married Penelope, Bill, who married Fleur, and Charlie, who married a girl named Ashlee. Percy has two children: Elizabeth, fourteen, in fourth year and Daniel, eleven, in first year. Bill has four children: Nicole, in seventh, Gabe, in fifth, Anne, in second, and John, ten. Charlie also has four children: Justin and Kelsey, fifth year twins, Sandy, in fourth, and Sara-Jane, in third.

_Okay, this story takes place from Lily Potter's point of view._

Why, why, why? WHY does my stupid, blonde, retarded, size one, perfect cousin have to go to Hogwarts? Wouldn't it have been easier to home school her. I cannot stand Kelsey. I have been forced to share a dorm with her since the first year, and I hate it. Okay, okay, the first three years were okay. The, over the summer after third year, she hit puberty and I didn't. She decided I wasn't good enough, because I am short, breast less, not blonde, and size five rather then one. She thinks if your not super thin, you aren't worth talking to. Her best friend is super thin like her, but that is because they hardly ever eat.

Anyway, this summer, I grew a bit. I am the smallest B-cup ever, and I am Five-four. I am still a size five though. I have red hair with gold and brown streaks. My eyes are bright green. I was the only kid out of my family to get the green eyes. Everyone else just got brown. That makes me lucky, I guess. Anyway, today is September first, and Kelsey has just announced that the closet will be all hers. We start classes tomorrow, and I am glad. There are four girls in our dormitory. Me and Kelsey, my best friend Tess and Kelsey's best friend Marissa. I hate Marissa even more then I hate Kelsey, because she has a crush on the same person I do.

That nigh at Dinner, I stared dreamily at David Malfoy. He is so cute. He and Matt are identical, but they wear their hair different and they now look nothing alike. David is the cutest guy I know. I, at the pitiful age of fifteen, have never had a boyfriend. Kelsey has been laid by three different people. So she puts out and I don't. That doesn't mean I can't have a boyfriend. Boys never seem to like me. They changed our dress code, so we can wear whatever we want under our robes. I tend to wear a lot of black and red, so people I guess associate me with the Devil, so they are scared of me. Tess has black hair, but she dresses with more color. She has a boyfriend: Gabe. They are totally in love and I am totally jealous.

I wondered what it would be like in David's arms… Then I snapped to attention when David called, "Hey, you want to be the singer in Sirius's band?" I sighed. That's what David thinks of me as; his best friend's kid sister. "Sure…" I said vaguely. Sirius was forming a band. He was the lead guitarist, Gabe was on keyboard, David was drums, and I guess I was singer. I am a pretty good singer, but I don't like singing in front of people, but if it meant spending more time with David… Finally, I dragged myself from the table and walked up to my dorm. Kelsey was there with whatever boyfriend she had now, and they were snogging each other senseless on her bed. I rolled my eyes and locked myself in the bathroom.

I stood and looked at my reflection. Well, my face anyway. I hated my hair. I hated red hair at that moment. I wanted black hair like Tess. Even plain brown hair would be good. But not red. Finally, after looking at my hair for several minutes, I took out my wand and charmed my hair black. I looked at it. I liked it. Now I added a scarlet streak in the front. My hair is long, it reaches my butt. I didn't like it that long, so I cut it so it was just past my shoulders. Then I tapered it.

Wow, I thought, looking at myself.

I spun, and my hair flipped out. It hadn't done that in ages. And I hadn't done anything this dramatic to myself in long time, not since I cut my hair to my chin when I was nine. I decided to go to bed before Kelsey stopped snogging and Tess and Marissa came up.

The next morning I groaned when I heard Tess yelling at me to get up. I hate getting up; I love to sleep. I dragged myself out of bed. Tess saw my new haircut and hair color. "What did you do?" she exclaimed, seeing my hair. I must have looked crestfallen, because she smiled and said, "I love it!"

I smiled and got dressed. Today I decided on my short black skirt, black tights, and my red t-shirt. Also, my combat boots. I brushed my hair and left it down instead of putting it back. Everyone who mattered had an opinion:

James: Cute. I'll have to beat up any boy who likes you now… (I hit him) Just joking, gosh. Don't get so mad.

Sirius: You look just like dad! (I have my mum's hair, but otherwise I take after my dad)

Remus: You look different. I liked your old hair better. This isn't you.

Molly: I'm going to tell mummy and she isn't going to be happy! You'll get a howler soon (Molly is a little tattle-tale who's only friend is our cousin Anne.)

Kelsey: I see you want to be popular. As if.

Matt: Who's the boy you're trying to impress? (I blush)

I saved the best for last: David: I like it a lot. You look great Lily.

Can you believe it? David, adorable David said that he liked my hair. I swear, it's first period Muggle studies class and I am still floating. I am so happy he said he liked it. I have gotten a lot of compliments, and a small handful of negative remarks, made of course by Kelsey's friends. There was one from Marissa, she said it made me look like a bat, but I know that she is jealous because her hair is horrible. Still, the best compliment I received all day was from David. At dinner that night, Tess and me looked at our homework. It wasn't too bad surprisingly. We have two classes a day, but each one only once a week, so the homework was is due the following class. My classes are as follows: Monday: Transfiguration, Potions Tuesday: Muggle Studies, Astronomy

Wednesday: History of Magic, Care of Magical Creatures Thursday: Charms, Arithmacy Friday: Defense against the Dark Arts, Herbology.

I am on the Quiditch team. I'm seeker, just like my dad was. James is captain, he is the keeper, and David is on the team, he is a beater. The rest of the team are just Gryffindor with no relation to the Potter/Weasley/Malfoy clan.

Anyway, back to dinner. I heard David and Matt having a fight, so I turned to look. Matt is girl-crazy, just so you know. They were fighting because I guess David wouldn't let Matt be the singer for their band. "I wanna be the singer!" Matt said, whining like a little child. "No! Your head is always in the clouds thinking about whatever girlfriend you currently have. Besides, you suck." David said back. "No I don't! And besides, it isn't like that bitch Lily is any better." Now all my brothers were looking at Matt and David, seeing what he would say, if he would defend me. What David said next was surprising. "Lily is not a bitch, she is an excellent singer. You are the opposite. Now please go somewhere else, you disgust me at this moment." David said slowly, and Matt stormed off to sit with his girlfriend. Which is Kelsey. I wrinkled my nose as they started snogging. I lost my appetite and stormed upstairs to my dorm.

Once I was up there, I decided to short-sheet Kelsey's bed. I was just finishing when Tess came in. "You know, David was worried about you. He was worried that what Matt said hurt your feeling. I told him you left because you saw Matt and Kelsey snogging, but he didn't believe me."

I smiled. That was so like David, to be worried. He worries about everyone. But still, a tiny bit of me hoped he was really worried about me because he liked me, not just because. But I might as well keep dreaming. David would no sooner like me then like Molly. I know he just thinks of me as his best friend's sister, and I hate that, and there is nothing I can do to change that.

The next morning, Molly was right. I did get a howler. I'm sure that the whole school heard to. LILY BRIANNA POTTER! HOW DARE YOU DYE YOUR HAIR BLACK AND CUT IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! ARE YOU NOT PROUD OF THE RED HAIR THAT CAME FROM ME? YOU CHARM IT RIGHT BACK TO RED THIS INSTANT, OR I WILL COME TO SCHOOL AND DO IT FOR YOU! Then it exploded. I looked at Molly, who was looking scared. Wait till later, I mouthed at her, and she stuck out her tongue. I rolled my eyes and went to the bathroom and died my hair back to red. My mom didn't say what color red, so I dyed it to the darkest red that it would go. My hair now looked even better. The bell rang now, so I had to go to class. Nobody said anything about my hair this time, and I was kind of glad. Tess grinned at me as I came into history of Magic. In her hand was a note from David for me.

_A/N: Please review! Reviews would mean so much. Sooner you review, the sooner I give you another chapter._


	2. The hospital wing and Hogsmade

_A/N: Thanx to whoever reviewed for the last chapter. I do have an apology. I did not mean to make anyone who is blonde feel bad, but almost all the blonde'sI know, i really don't like. And i didn't mean that size five was a bad size, I just meant that Kelsey was skinnier then Lily. And critisism is very welcome. I probably wont update this quickly all the time, I just wanted to clear some things up. _

_Disclaimer: I DON"T OWN ANYTHING THAT J.K. ROWLING MADE UP. THE ORIGINAL CHARECTERS ARE MINE THOUGH._

_Dedication: To whoever reviews my story. I am lonely, for it's summer. Reviews cheer me up a lot._

I ran over to Tess and grabbed the note out of her hand. I sat next to her and opened it. It said: _Dear Lily, I am sorry for what my brother said. You are a wonderful singer and definitely not a bitch. Your hair is really great, no matter what that blonde bimbo Kelsey says. David. _I sighed. So it wasn't a letter confessing his undenying (sp?) love for me, like I had hoped. If it was, he would not have given it to Tess to give to me. I handed it to her to read it. She knows that I am in love with David, but she does respect my privacy. I laughed as she read the letter. "He really does care about you…" she said, and I smiled. Gabe is a really good boyfriend for her, and she says they have been to second base. Oh, how much I long for a boyfriend.

At lunch, Sirius, Gabe and David were going over names for the band, and I joined them. They were suggesting totally weird names. Finally, I said "How about Centerfold?" Clearly they had no idea about the song by J. Geils band. If they did, they would have hated the name. But I knew that they had never heard that song, so they really liked the name. "Centerfold it is!" David shouted. He put his hand up, and when it came down he brushed my shoulder. "Sorry." He said, and I knew that I was blushing. I was hopelessly in love with him, and knew it. When the lunch bell rang, David and I were in a discussion about muggle music. I have care of magical creatures, and he had Herbology, so he just walked me to class and continued our discussion. It was probably the closest I will ever be to the love of my life.

During care of Magical creatures, all I could think about was David. Then Professor Hagrid took out a firecrab we were studying. I wasn't paying attention when it was my turn to touch the firecrab, and it burned my hand pretty badly. My mind snapped off David in an instant. "Owwww!" I moaned, starting to cry. "Sirius? Take her to hospital wing pronto." Hagrid called, and my twin brother came over. He is a lot bigger then me, so he just picked me up and carried me to the hospital wing. I was glad, my hand hurt a LOT. Madam Pomfrey clucked her tongue and mended my hand in about a minute. "Now, burns are different. You will have a little tenderness in that hand. Your not right handed, are you?" she said, and I shook my head. I take after my mother there; I am left-handed. Madam Pomfrey wrapped my hand up in something and I left.

I didn't want to go to dinner, because the class I should have been in didn't let out for another half hour. I didn't want to go back to my dorm either. Finally, I went to the room of requirement. I am feeling kind of depressed about everything: My mom, homework, the hair I know my mum hates, David, more stuff to. In the room of requirement, there was a room painted the same color of my hair with a piano in it. I know how to play piano really well, but no one ever hears me, or the songs I write. I sat down and let my fingers fly over the keys. I sang one of my songs about David. I was onto one about school when I heard something behind me. I turned around and David was standing there, looking impressed.

"I didn't know you could play like that." He said, and I said, my voice shaking, "How much did you hear?" "A bit." He replied, and my voice grew stronger "How much?" I said, and he sensed the urgency in my voice. "From the beginning of that song." He was the first person that had ever heard one of my songs, and the first person to ever really hear me play. I could feel myself wanting to cry, but I wouldn't. My hand was hurting, I guess this was the tenderness that Madam Pomfrey mentioned. "What's wrong?" he said, seeing my face. I shook my head. I got up and I ran out of the room. How could he listen to my music? It's private. I don't even let Tess see my songs. Yet he seemed to think it was perfectly fine to barge in there and listen to me play my heart out… I ran all the why to my dormitory, threw myself on my bed and cried myself to sleep. He would never love me. He couldn't. Not his best friend's sister.

Tess woke me up at about nine o'clock. She handed me some potion. I sat up and rubbed my eyes tiredly. "What's this?" I said groggily, and Tess told me that it was for my PMS. I scowled. It's tough when you have a best friend who knows everything about you. I am always super emotional right before I get It, and Tess knows that, unfortunately. I drank the potion and felt better. I decided to come down and do homework with her. I went down stairs and David was there. Once he saw me, he jumped up and came over. "I am sorry for barging in like that, but you're so good and I just wanted to listen…" he said, trailing off. I shook my head, "Forget about it. I over reacted" I said. He smiled his adorable smile and went back to writing in some notebook of his. I think it's a journal of some sort, because he never let's anyone touch it except for him.

The next day, in charms(My best subject), Tess decided she wanted Gabe for her partner. I know that they are together, but she always picks me for her partner. I ended up without a partner. A shy girl with blonde braids named Claire Longbottom didn't have a partner either, so I partnered with her. We have charms with the Ravenclaws, and Claire is in that house. We were supposed to be practicing cheering charms or something, but I wasn't paying attention. I was to busy talking to Claire. It turned out that she is Neville Longbottom and Luna Lovegood's kid. My parents knew them when they went to school. I told them my name, and she goes, "Oh. You're a Potter." She said it like it was a bad thing. "What's wrong with being a Potter?" I said, puzzled. Then she told me that my own twin brother would not leave Claire alone, and was constantly teasing her.

I know my brother is a jokester, but I have never known him to pick on people. So, after charms, I hunted him down before lunch. "Are you picking on people, like Claire?" I said, and he rolled his eyes. "Cool it Lil. I only tease her, like I tease everyone. She just gets a little angry." I was angry. "She hates the all the Potters now." I said, and he rolled his eyes again. "So what Lil? Go get a life. It's not like because one girl hates you, you're going to stop living." He snapped, and I stalked off. My own twin brother told me to get a life, something that Kelsey tells me to get everyday. I went up to my room, grabbed my broom and went outside to fly. I have the newest model broom, a Lightning-Bolt. It is the fastest broom since the firebolt. I got it in the mail from the Malfoys, for my birthday last year(My birthday is in October).

I was outside flying around for quite a long time when I started to get cold. I flew back toward grounds. It was late by now. I walked back up to my common room and up to my Dorm. I took out the homework that was easiest: Charms. I love charms, and DADA, but charms more. I have to do a two-foot essay on the effects of a cheering charm, and master the spell. That homework took me a total of half-an-hour, practicing on my Cat, Cody. He has now clawed his way to the top of my Four-poster and is sitting on top of the drapes, chasing his tail. Anyway, I finished all the rest of my homework, and I was dead tired. I fell into bed with our even changing into pajamas.

When I woke up the next morning, I was exhausted still. I was up late the night before, and I was feeling it now. I stumbled out of bed and brushed my hair into a ponytail. Except now all my hair doesn't go into a ponytail, so it was hanging in my face. Anyway, I pulled on the first clothes I saw that were clean and threw on my robes and ran to breakfast. When I got there, I knew I must have looked toasted, because Tess was like, "What did you do last night anyway?" David was concerned though. "Are you okay? Maybe you should go to the hospital wing or something, you don't look so good." I managed a weak smile, and poured myself a cup of coffee. David was so sweet and adorable… I just wish so much that he would like me.

I got through most of the day, but finally in Herbology, a subject I like a lot, professor Sprout sent me to the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey fussed over me like a mother hen. "You should have come straight to me this morning. You could have done serious damage to you immune system." I was tuning her out, thinking about stuff. She handed me some potion, and I drank it. I instantly felt better. "What do I have anyway?" I asked, and she answered, "The flu. From that burn on your hand becoming slightly infected" That's what everyone was making such a huge deal over? The flu? Geez, I mean, I am not dying. I went back up to the common room to wait for Tess to come back from Herbology. I had been in the hospital wing twice in two days. When she got back, I asked her if she wanted to go to Hogsmade and maybe get trashed or something.

Tess raised her eyebrows. "Lil, you have never had more then a sip of alcohol in your life, and now you want to go get drunk? I don't think so. But Sure, I'll go to Hogsmade." So we went and kicked back at the three broomsticks. After three rounds of butterbeer, Tess and me went to Zonko's. I was looking through stuff to prank Kelsey with, and I was about to buy some powder that makes you gain thirty pounds for like, three days, when Tess was showing me these mirrors in the Blast from the Past section. "Look, you can talk to each other through them. We should get some." I was hesitant; I only had a few Galleons left from the money her mom had given her for new school things. She gave in and they each bought a set, plus the Fat powder.

By then it was getting late, so we snuck back to the Honeydukes cellar and then ran all the way to the entrance. I took out the map that I had found in a box in the attic. Also, there was an invisibility cloak, but I thought I best leave that. Anyway, we were about to sneak out, I was checking the map when we heard voices. "-Most wonderful girl in the world. She's beautiful. I love her eyes, and her hair, and… well, I just love her. But I can't tell-" Tess looked at me, and I had began to cry. We had just heard David say those things, and I am positive that they aren't about me.

_A/N: Okay, I hoped you like this_ _chapter. I am just a lonely teenager writing Fanfic because I have nothing better to do… A review would brighten my day so much… SO PLEASE PRESS THE PERIWINKLE BUTTON AND LEAVE ME A REVIEW! _


	3. A Love Poem

_Again, thanks to those who reviewed. It means a lot to know that somebody is ready my story. _

_Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, I would be getting it published and not posting it on the net. In short, I don't own Harry Potter. I do own the poem. It's crap, but I thought it up as I went along_

_Dedication: to…a…certain person… who… will…probably…never…read…this…but…if…you…do…I…love…you…and…ya._

"Stop crying Lily! He's going to hear you!" Tess hissed, and I stopped abruptly. The last thing I wanted was for David to catch me crying. He would want to know what and I would probably tell him. That would not be good. Anyway, we snuck out and went back to the common room. Just my luck, James was waiting. He has become super-protective big brother. My eyes were red, so he got all angry at whoever made me cry. "Nothing was wrong, I just got something in my eye." I said, and he got was all, "Bullshit. If you don't want me to protect you, so be it." And walked off. I swear, he has the biggest head. He and our Cousin Nicole are Head boy and girl, so they share a dorm, separate rooms of course. Nicole is nice and all, but she is a little too much like a veila. She has white blond hair and million guys lusting after her. Ooooo, once again, I wish I were someone else.

By then, it was really late and I just collapsed into bed without even thinking about what I heard David say about some girl. The next morning, I felt really good. I went flying early in the morning, then we had Quiditch practice for three hours. After that it was lunch. I was having a very busy Saturday so far. I went to the library to look up a plant for Herbology, since I missed most of it the day before. I found David there, scribbling away in that journal of his. Once he saw me, he sat it down on the seat next to him, motioned for me to sit on his other side, and then pulled out a book for potions. "Hey" he said, and I smiled and leafed through the book. I started the extra-credit essay I was working on for Herbology. I was working for about half-an-hour, occasionally talking to David, when he finally said he had to be going, and he gathered up his things and left. Once he was gone for maybe five minutes, I noticed he left his journal.

I couldn't resist opening it. I mean, he was always scribbling away, I had to see what it said. I flipped through it quickly, and a lot of the pages seemed to have poems and songs on them, and some had writings. I stopped at the one he had been writing.:

My darling

I love you so much

I don't want to tell you

And shatter our friendship

You don't know

And you never will know

How much I love you

My Lily Flower.

Lily, I love you so much

More then anyone

You are my world

Yet you will never know

My green-eyed Love, Lily.

My heart was turning summersaults. The poem was about me! David loved me! He had been talking about me! My mind was thinking in exclamation points. I set the journal back on the chair so when David came back for it he wouldn't know I read it. He did come back, about five minutes later. "Have you seen-" he said, looking frazzled. I cut him off, pointing to the chair. Then I realized what a stupid act that was. He looked at it, looked at me, and said, "Did you read it?" he said, panic coming over his face. I shook my head. "Liar, Liar, pants on fire!" my mind yelled, but I ignored it. I had never seen David the way he looked now. He grabbed the journal and practically ran out of there.

I didn't tell anyone what I had seen. He couldn't know. How could I tell him that I read the most private thing in his life. That's right, I couldn't. My mind was spinning. I wanted to run after him and tell him I loved him to, but I couldn't. I know I can't, because then he would know that I read it and then he would hate me forever. I had to find a way to let him know that I loved him to. But how…

I spent all of Saturday pondering that. David was avoiding me. I was sitting in the common room next to the fire thinking about it when Molly came up. "Hi Weasel." I said, and she stuck out her tongue. I swear, I cannot stand her. She is the most spoiled-rotten sissy kid I have ever known. The worst part is she's my sister. She is the baby of the family. I swear, my Parents hate me. I do my homework. I am never good enough for them, they always compare me to James or Molly or one of my other brothers. They let me know that I am a failure for a daughter. At least, my mom does. My dad does whatever my mom tells him to. I hate my mom, I love my mom, it's confusing. Anyway, Molly said, "Mummy is really mad. She says that if you get bad grades again this semester, she is taking away your wand for the summer." Trust my mom to think up some stupid punishment.

"So what? I can't do magic anyway this summer." I sneered, and Molly laughed. I just wanted to punch her. She is twelve and a royal pain in the ass. I turn fifteen on October 31, Halloween. Apparently that was the night my father was orphaned, so it doesn't mean much to me. My family always seems to forget that it's my birthday to, and not just Sirius's. Anyway, Molly loves torturing me, and once she saw that this bit of news didn't seem to have the effect she had hoped for, she stalked off. I know she is jealous because I have the basement as my room, which is huge. I read her Diary once, and she confessed that she was totally in love with me. She wanted to be just like me. Unfortunately, she felt the same way about our mother. I am the only one in the family with real red hair. James, Sirius and Remus have black, and Molly has brown. I had red, now dark red.

Saturday night, when I went down to Dinner, Tess figured out that something was up. "Tell me!" she pleaded, but I shook my head. I wouldn't. It was David's business to confess his love to me, not gossip. Tess likes to talk a lot, so she would tell people, then the whole school would know. Unless I asked her to keep it a secret… NO! I yelled at myself. People looked at me in the dining hall. They must have thought that I was crazy, because, A, I had just screamed at the dinner table, and B, I was screaming at myself. Tess looked at me weird, but she left me alone. "You have some issues." She said, and went back to eating. I went back to my fried chicken, but I couldn't help wonder where David was. Was he writing more poetry about me, was he writing a song about me. Finally, I got up, went to the room of requirement, and played the piano for four hours straight. Then I fell asleep on the bed in the room.

When I woke up the next morning, I had absolutely no idea where I was. It took me a moment of almost screaming to remember that I was in the room of requirement. I got up, but I didn't want to leave. If I left, that would mean that I would have to explain to Tess where I had been the night before, and that wasn't something that I was looking forward to. Finally, I dragged myself out of bed, magicked myself to my room, changed and brushed my hair. Then I went to breakfast. Once I got there, Kelsey was all, "Where were you last night. Shagging some guy?" everyone laughed. I, really mad, retorted, "No, that's you, Dear cousin. You see, I, unlike you, are not a slut."

Kelsey opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She loves to tease me, and say stuff like that. I usually never retaliate, but today she pushed the limits. She stood up. "What did you say bitch?" she said, in which I said, "You heard me." She stepped out from the table, and so did I. She was the one who through the first punch. Before I knew it, we were tangled up, punching each other. In case you were wondering, I won by a long shot. She is a very poor fighter, but I grew up with three brothers, if you know what I mean. Anyway, she had only managed to punch me a few times, but she did manage to slap me across the face and leave four nice long scratches from her fifty-galleon manicure. She, on the other hand, had a black eye, her nose was bleeding and her lip cut. Our robes were both torn. We had been broken apart by professor McGonnagall, who has been very irritable lately. She did not look happy at all.

"How could you, fighting at the dining hall. And Gryffendors to! I thought you had more pride then this. Twenty points from Gryffendor. Lily, a week of detention for you, and Kelsey, two weeks for you, because you started the fight. I will be writing to both your parents. You may go to the hospital wing to get cleaned up." She said, and I left. I could here Kelsey's sobs up the hallway. I went back to the common room; I didn't want to go to the hospital wing again. Once I got there, the entire common room cheered. They were all happy that I had given Kelsey what she deserved. I grinned, then winced, because the scratches on my face. Tess, who wants to be a healer, came over and healed them for me. "Thanks." I said gratefully. She grinned. "Good job. It's only ten. What do you want to do?" she said, and I groaned. "I have a week of detention. So, Homework." Amazingly, I still had a ton of homework.

So that's what I spent three hours doing, Homework. It was boring, but at least I had it done so that I wouldn't have to do late when I got back from detention. HaHa to Kelsey for having two weeks, serves her right. That wasn't what my mom thought though, when I got another Howler that day at dinner. "LILY BRIANNA POTTER! I NEVER HAD THIS MUCH TROUBLE AS I DID WITH ANY OF YOU BROTHERS OR MOLLY. HOW DARE YOU PICK A FIGHT WITH YOUR SWEET COUSIN KELSEY. YOU APOLAGIZE TO HER, THERE WAS NO REASON TO PICK A FIGHT. I AM VERY DISAPOINTED LILY, VERY DISAPOINTED." She shouted. Then the letter burst into flames. But another letter came from my dad. I know it was from my dad, because it was his extremely old owl. This not only had two words: Good Job. If mum knew he had sent that, she would be furious. I was guessing she didn't know.

Later that night, David came over. "Good job. You gave Kelsey what was coming at her." He said quietly, and I grinned. He was talking to me again. I was hoping that he was going to confess his undenying love for me. Instead, he was all, "I think it was really brave of you and… um…well… goodnight." He said, and my shoulders slumped. "'Night." I called after his retreating back. I wondered if he was ever going to tell me… I hoped he would…

_A/N: Hoped you like that chapter. Isn't that periwinkle button in the left hand corner looking tempting to push? Hint, Hint. Please Review. Just a few words are all I'm asking._


	4. The Dream and the Rose

_A/N: Thanx to whoever reviewed, I appreciate it a whole lot. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. _

_Dedication: To the stupid mistake I made. Oh ya, and to my reviewers._

When I woke up on Monday morning, I jumped out of bed. I knew that today was Monday, our first Monday with classes. I was worried, because I have potions, and the potions master, Snape, hates me. First period, I have transfiguration. This is one of my worse subjects. I tried and tried to change the kitten into a puppy, but it was not working. Finally, I threw my wand down in disgust.

"Need some help?" Tess said, chuckling. I stuck my tongue out.

Finally, after several dozen more tries, I finally managed to transform my kitten into a very fluffy, small, catlike puppy. Professor McGonnagall surveyed it from over her glasses, frowned, but she didn't say anything. She was still angry with me for the whole fighting in the dining hall thing. When she turned her back, I stuck out my tongue. Kelsey snorted and said,

"Oh, real mature." She was jealous. She still had a kitten in front of her.

That night, once I got back from cleaning the transfiguration classroom at like one, I went and sat on the couch. I lie down and let the fire soak over me. I was so tired I fell asleep. I had a dream. I was chained to the wall, and Bellatrix Black (I saw a picture pf her, that's how I knew it was her. Most of the death eater's were not caught.) Was in front of me. She had David in front of me. She was torturing him.

"No!" I screamed. Bellatrix paid no attention. She continued to torture him. She was about to kill him

"No!" I shouted frantically. "Take me instead. Just don't kill David, please." She killed him.

"No!" I screamed. I was crying in my dream. "David, I love you. So much, I do. Please don't go, David! You should have killed me instead." I said to Bellatrix. Then I woke up. David was shaking me.

His face was white. "Are you okay? You were shouting." He said, sounding concerned. Now it was my turn to turn white.

"What did you hear…?" I said, and David replied, "…Nothing."

I sighed. Then I realized I was still crying. I am worried out of my mind about that dream… What it if comes true. David hugged me. "I was coming back from a detention and I saw you screaming…" he said, genuinely worried.

I got up to go back to my dorm and go to bed, but my knees were shaking so bad from the dream that they gave out. "Lily!" David exclaimed, and he bent down and scooped me up in his arms. I nuzzled my head into his neck and he carried me to my dorm. He put a freezing spell on the stairs so they wouldn't change, then he set me in bed. "'Night. Lil." He said, but I had already fallen asleep.

That morning when I woke up, I couldn't remember what had happened the night before. Then it all came flooding back to me: The dream, David, and him carrying me to my bed. I was floating as I got dressed, and then I remembered what the dream was about. Maybe David hadn't been entirely truthful when he said he hadn't heard anything, just like I was about his journal.

"Lily! Get you f-ing stuff off my desk!" Kelsey screamed, and I scrambled over to get my eyeliner pencil I had set down there.

Today I decided to dress in normal clothes, no black. I put on a pair of light blue jeans, a light green tank top, and a white cardigan, then my robes. Kelsey saw me and rolled her eyes. "Ew." She said. Marissa agreed.

Tess, however, told me I looked good, so that's how I went to breakfast that morning. The rest of the week, that's how I went down to breakfast. Everyone told me that I looked great, so I decided to keep the look. So far, I was having a really good year.

On Saturday morning, we had Quiditch practice for four hours. When we were finally done, everyone was tired, and it was only noon.

"You guys are looking great this year. Our first game is two weeks from today, against Ravenclaw. Be prepared, they are good this year. Lily, try and catch the snitch quick." James said, grinning. I just yawned.

"Can we go now? I'm starving." Sirius whined, and everyone else joined in. James nodded, and we made our way back up to the castle. David fell back into step with me. "Hey." He said, and I smiled. I was rather tired, last night I was up late because I had my last detention and it lasted until three. I didn't get to bed until four, then Kelsey wakes me up at seven, and then I had Quiditch for four hours, so I was exhausted. David noticed.

"Are you okay? You look toasted." He said, looking concerned. "I'm fine." I said, but I was so tired I could barely walk in a straight line. He looked at me sideways.

"Are you sure? You are walking kind of funny." He said, and I didn't say anything. I was too tired. Finally, after watching me for several minutes, David told me to get on his back and he'd give me a piggyback ride to the common room. I hoped on, and he carried me all the way and laid me down on the couch. I was asleep within minutes.

When I woke up, I felt weird. I sat up and saw that I had my Quiditch practice clothes on, and that I was in the common room. I realized what happened. I looked at my watch, and saw it was almost five. I jumped up and ran to my dorm, changed my clothes, and went off to the library to find Tess. I found her, along with our friend Kimmy, from Ravenclaw. The two of them exchanged looks when I showed up.

"We saw David carrying you back to the common room." Kimmy said, her eyebrows raised. She also knows that I like David.

"Ya. Are you two together yet?" Tess said, looking hopeful. I shook my head. "Aww, man. Here Kimmy." Tess said, and she handed Kimmy a few galleons.

"You guys bet on me?" I said, feeling hurt. Kimmy and Tess exchanged a glance. They bet on me. I knew it. I turned around and walked right out of there. Right into David.

"Oh!" I said as I was knocked backwards. I fell onto the floor, but David stayed up. "Sorry." He said, and he put his hand down to help me up. I took it, and he pulled me up. He held my hand a second longer then normal, and then I let go. "Sorry for running into you. I got to go." I said, and I went back to the common room.

I sat there for a minute or so, and then I went to my room. I saw a box in my bed, wrapped in green paper. My birthday wasn't for another month, so I had no idea what it was. I opened it. Inside was a necklace with a green stone at the end. There was a note: _I think you're beautiful. Sincerely, you secret admirer. _My heart was beating. The necklace was beautiful. I hoped so much that it was from David, but it wasn't anything close to his writing. David has childlike writing, this was very elegant. I shook my head, put the necklace into my jewelry box, and went down to Dinner.

Since I was still mad at Tess and Kimmy, I sat with my cousin Sandy. She is the nicest girl in the world, really sweet, but she is Kelsey and Justin's little sister. Anyway, she doesn't have their trademark blonde hair, but red hair like mine. Anyway, I told her about the fat powder, and she told me to do it know. So I did; I slipped it into Kelsey's drink. I watched her drink it and nothing happened.

I waited all night for something to happen, but nothing did. When I went to bed that night, I was angry because I spent money on that and it didn't work.

It turned out it worked very well actually. I woke up in the morning to Kelsey's screams. I rolled over and burst out in laughter. Kelsey's legs and arms were swollen, and she was really wide. I was laughing really hard. "What happened Kelse?" I said, and she scowled. She stomped into the bathroom, and Tess came over.

"Sorry about betting on you." She said, but I was still laughing. She was to, and our fight was forgotten. Kelsey couldn't find anything to wear, since none of her clothes fit. Finally she pulled out a pair of sweatpants and expanded them using magic. She did the same with a t-shirt and robes. I could tell Kelsey's day was going horrible. Her hair was in a ponytail when she went downstairs to the dining hall.

Tess and I were right behind her when she went into the dining hall. The whole dining hall laughed. She went to sit with her friends, but they told her know. She went to sit with Matt, but he shook his head, "Babe, it's over." He said, shaking his head.

Kelsey was crying now, and suddenly I felt bad. "Do you want to come and sit with Tess and Me?" I said, and Kelsey sneered, "No way, I'd rather sit on the roof they with geeks like you." Maybe I didn't feel sorry for her.

Nobody saw her for the rest of the day. That night, when I went back up to my dorm to get me Potions book, I saw the effects were starting to wear off. She was starting to get a little smaller. I saw that because she and Brad Jacobson, the school Jock and Hottie, were shagging on her bed. I rolled my eyes; I knew she was doing that because she was looking so ugly right now.

The next morning, Monday, the effects were almost gone. Kelsey was just a little puffy. As we went to Transfiguration, Kelsey was talking to Marissa. As we were going back into the classroom, I heard the end of their conversation: "-get Lily back. She wont mess with me anymore." I gulped. What did that mean?

I found out after transfiguration, at Lunch. Kelsey and Marissa were holding my Diary. I only write in about twice a week, but it has a lot of secrets. Kelsey was standing at the entrance hall, reading it out loud. She hadn't read anything interesting, but she was about to come on a part saying how much I love David. I didn't need anyone hearing that. I struggled with what to do, until finally, I said, "Accio Diary!" and it came flying toward me. Unfortunately Professor McGonnagall was right there. "Detention with me tonight, Potter, and five points from Gryffendor. I'll see you tonight."

I shot Kelsey and icy glare, and she smirked back. I walked to my dorm to put my diary away. I had left it on my desk instead of hiding it like I usually do. Once I got to my room and hid my diary, I saw that there was another box on bed. I picked it up and opened it. In the same elegant writing, it said: _Lily, you are wonderful, beautiful, awesome. Those are just a few describing words. Love, you secret admirer. _In the box there was a single red rose. I sighed with happiness. Even if it wasn't from David, it was still incredibly romantic.

As I walked to Potions, I still had the red rose. I was grinning. Tess saw the rose, and she gasped. "Who's that from?" she said eagerly. I shrugged. Once we got to the stairs to the dungeons, I saw David. He had a weird look on his face once he saw the rose.

_A/N: Thank you so much to my reviews. I really appreciate the reviews. Now I would really like it if I got some more. SO PLEASE PRESS THE PERIMINKLE BUTTON IN THE LEFT HAND CORNER! I WOULD LIKE THAT! PLEASE!_


	5. Gabe the Meanie, Tucker the Man

_Thanx to whoever reviewed the last chapter. I got a lot of bad reviews from the last chapter, so there is a few things I have to say. If you are going to give me critisism, fine, i dont mind, but if you are going to tell me to stop writing this fanfic, I would rather you not review. Another thing: I DID NOT MEAN THAT A SIZE FIVE WAS FAT! I did not mean anything like that. I just meant that Kelsey thinks that Lily is fat, not that it is a fat size. Okay?_

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter_

_Dedication: To my friends Meghan and Ashley. _

I tried to figure out the look on David's face, but I couldn't. I could tell that the look meant something, but I wasn't sure what. I looked at him for a few seconds before Tess dragged me down to the dungeon with Snape.

Once we got there, Snape took attendance. Once he got to my name, he looked at me. He is old, and I think he gets meaner the older he gets. Anyway, he looked at the Rose on my desk.

"Aaawww, Lily has an admirer." He said, but he said in a way that made it sound horrible. "That person must be out of their mind to like you." He said, and that hurt. It must have been because that was what I had been thinking for a long time.

I could feel the tears flowing. I almost got up and ran out of the room, but I stuck it out. I had already missed some classes, and I couldn't afford to miss any more. I hate potions, but I usually do okay. Today we were just taking notes, so I didn't have to look at Snape, just listen to him.

When potions were over, I was really relieved. I went up to my dorm and did my homework. It was seven when I realized that we had Quiditch practice. I ran all the way to the field with my broomstick. Once I got there, everyone had already started. James looked at me disapprovingly. "What kept you?" he said, and I replied, "I…um… forgot. Sorry."

James shook his head. I noticed David was right behind me coming in late. His cheeks were red, so I figured he had ran to. "Now what's you excuse." James snapped, looking even more irritated. "I forgot." David said, a lot more bluntly then I had said it.

"Both of you go find a spot in the stands. You can sit out practice." James snapped again, and I groaned. Sometimes he lets his authority go to his head.

I stumbled to a seat, and David sat next to me. "This sucks, I have a ton of homework." David said, and I nodded, even though I had basically none. I just liked agreeing with him.

We ended up talking the whole time. We somehow ended up talking about love lives. "There's this girl, she is absolutely wonderful, and I'm in Love with her. But I don't know how to tell her." David said, and I knew he was talking about me.

"Just tell her and see what she says." I said back.

"But what if she doesn't like me back? And I'm shy… Any ideas?" he said. I laughed. "How could a girl not like you? You're so sweet and caring. Just tell her." I said back.

David shook his head. "I can't. Maybe eventually, but not now." He said, and I shrugged. "Do what you want then." I said, and then I got up to leave, since the practice was over. "Lily, wait." David said, and I turned around hopefully. "I-I liked talking to you. You're a great friend." He said, finally, and my shoulders drooped. Was he ever going to tell me the truth?

As I trooped back up to my dorm, I realized that I had done, or at least what I wasn't doing. I told David to tell me, but I'm not telling him that I like him. I suddenly saw how hard it was for him. I had no idea why this was coming to me now, no then, but whatever.

I sneaked down to the kitchens, for I was starving. I hadn't had any dinner. The house elves catered to me very nicely. I was leaving when I almost ran into David. He was standing around the corner of the bowl of fruit. "Uh… Hi. I was coming to get some food… see ya later…" he said, sounding kind of awkward. I noticed that I seemed to be running into him a lot lately…

That morning, when everyone was done with breakfast, Dumbledore stood up. "I have an announcement. We will be having a Halloween ball. It shall be held on the thirty-first. It is costume. Fourth-years and up, but you may invite a younger student if you wish. That is all."

Once he sat down, the hall filled with chatter. Everyone was talking about what they would were to the ball. What would I wear? I thought. Tess was thinking about it to. So was Kelsey. She looked at Matt "Are we going together baby? Come on, I know you still want to be with me." She said all sweet like. He grinned and nodded, and they started snogging.

I watched all the boyfriends ask their girlfriends and I couldn't help feeling jealous. I wish a boy would ask me. Tess smiled at me. Gabe hadn't come over to her yet. I smiled at her back. Then the bell rang, and we all went to class. It was only the fifteenth of September; this dance was far away. Somebody could still ask me.

That night as I lounged around in the common room, trying to decide to start on homework or to read or something, Tess came in sobbing. Instantly I jumped up and rushed to her side. "What's wrong?" I said, and she just cried. I dragged her up to the dorm and then made her tell me. "Gabe s-said w-we should s-see other p-people! He likes M-Marissa!" she spilled out, sobbing.

I couldn't believe it. I liked Gabe a lot, but he dumped my best friend! I hugged Tess as hard as I could. "It's okay. You'll find someone else." I said, trying to soothe her. Finally, I pulled out my secret stash of chocolate from under my bed and handed her some of the richest kind. She shook her head, but I made her eat it. I could tell she felt better when she did. She stopped crying.

"Come on Tess, shape up. You gonna let Gabe see that he made a fool out of you? Just suck it up and move on." I said, and she smiled a little. She is very into being independent, and I could tell that I pusher the right buttons. Her smile got a little bigger, but then it stopped. I guess there is only so happy you can make your best friend after she's been dumped.

She went to bed a little after that, but I went to the bathroom to take a shower. I undressed and got in, and I noticed a bottle of shampoo, soap and body wash, and a few other things. I picked up the little card, and in the same scrawly writing, it said, "For you, my love." I opened the bottle and sniffed. It was Romantic wish, my favorite. I washed with it and went to bed very happy.

When I woke up Wednesday morning, I was in a good mood. Tess seemed to be in an okay mood. At breakfast she hardly ate anything, but that's understandable. As we went to History of Magic and she gazed at Gabe and Marissa holding hands, I could tell she was sad. I put my arm around her and smiled as we got to class. She didn't smile back this time.

The rest of the week went actually easy. Molly didn't tattle on me, I didn't get into trouble, I got a few more gifts from my admirer, and Kelsey ignored me. Tess was getting over Gabe. She now fancies Tucker, a very shy boy in our year, Gryffendor. Nothing good happened for a few weeks, actually. Just normal stuff.

On October the third, a Friday, however, something interesting did happen. I got asked to the ball, sort of. I got a note, along with a white rose. It said, _My dearest Lily, will you please got to the ball with me? If you will, meet me at eight on the dance floor by the pumpkins. I will be wearing a renaissance costume. Love, your secret admirer. _I practically fell to the floor in happiness. I was going to the ball, and I had a date. Even if it wasn't with David, it was someone.

Classes were over for the day, and Tess came up a little while later. "Why are you so happy?" she said, and I showed her the note. She grinned at me, but then sighed. "I wish Tucker would ask me." We had become good friends with Tucker in the last few weeks, but both of them were to shy to admit that they liked each other. I wish they would, because they both tell me how much they like each other and I am sworn by each of them not to tell the other.

After I floated down to Dinner and ate, David came up to me. "Hey, we are having our first band practice now, come on." H said, and I followed him. We went to the room of requirement. I frowned at Gabe, but he ignored me. David showed me the microphone. He showed me the words, and gave the other guys the music. We tried one song, and then another. We weren't that good, but I could hear us improving.

Once we were done, David just had to say, "Hey listen to Lily play the piano." So they all forced me onto the piano bench and just let me play. I played a song about being the oldest girl. First, I was a little strained, but then my fingers started to fly across the keys and soon I was in my own world, just playing. Finally, when I was done, I heard silence. I turned around, and they were all staring at me in awe. Sirius spoke first. "I had no idea you could play like that. It's amazing." Gabe nodded, and David had a look that said, "I told you so."

I got up and hurried out of the room. "Well, I got homework. See you later." And I went to see Tess. I didn't like them all staring at me. That was the first time people had heard me play on purpose. I liked the attention, but not them staring at me. Anyway, when I got to the common room, I found Tess and Tucker snogging on the couch. They sat up when I came in. "Hi." They said at the same time, Tess wiping her mouth.

"Hi…" I said, rather dazed. Tucker looked happy, and Tess looked radiant. I was glad to see her so happy. I went to a table and they went back to snogging. I had never seen her like this with Gabe. Speaking of Gabe, he happened to come in right then. He saw Tess and Tucker on the couch (I'm assuming they are together). He looked angry. "Tess! What are you doing? You said you would wait for me forever! I'm ready for you to do It now." Tess gasped, and I knew for a fact that Tess never agreed to shag him.

Tess looked really hurt. She is really sensitive sometimes. She looked ready to cry, and Tucker noticed. He stood up and punched Gabe square in the jaw. The two of them fought back and forth for a while, Tucker was winning. Finally, Gabe gave up and Tucker went back to Tess. She hugged him and cooed over him, and I could tell, that at this moment, they were really good for each other.

The next morning, Saturday, was the first Quiditch match. The team came into the locker rooms. We were playing Ravenclaw. They are really good, the team to beat. I was really nervous, and everyone could probably tell. The rest of the team looked nervous to. I hadn't eaten anything, as much as Tucker and Tess urged me to eat. David looked white, and Sirius's hair wasn't as intentionally messy as usual. James stood up. "Okay, we are going to win, okay team?" We all nodded, and trooped onto the field.

_A/N: I know that I might have said that Quiditch was early, but I'm not sure. This chapter and probably the next one are just going to be time passers. In a couple chapters there will be some good stuff. Anyway, thank you very much to my reviewers, I appreciate it. _


	6. Birthday Girl

_A.N: Thanx to my reviewers!_

_Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: Hmmm, to… All of my wonderful reviewers. This means you!_

As I got onto my broom, I was shaking. I hadn't was nervous, and I hadn't had any breakfast. We flew up. I looked around. I tune out the voice of the announcer, so I was surprised when I looked down at the score to find it 70 to 40, Gryffendor in the lead. After another half hour, the score was 120 to 40. I was feeling confident that we were going to win, and I was become less focused. I noticed a second to late that the Ravenclaw seeker was zooming after something gold.

I tried as fast as I could to catch up, but I couldn't. I got really close, then a bludger came pelting towards me and hit the very bottom of my feet, knocking me of course. By the time I had steadied myself, the other seeker held the snitch in his hand. I could her the announcer: "Final score, 120 to 190, Ravenclaw wins!" I flew to the ground and looked at the ground. I trudged to the locker room. It was all my fault that we had lost, all my fault. I felt a single tear roll down my face.

I felt someone's arm around me and I looked over. It was David. "Don't take it so hard. It's not your fault." I didn't say anything. He squeezed my shoulder and left, and I went and changed. Once I came back out, Tess and Tucker were waiting. "Hey." She said, and we walked back to the castle for lunch. I decided to forget about the game. It wasn't worth being so sad over.

A few weeks later, on the weekend before the Dance, there was a Hogsmade weekend. Tess and I went shopping for costumes. I still hadn't figured out who my secret admirer was, but I was almost positive that it was David, having someone else write it for him. Anyway, we walked into the shop, and started trying on the costumes. Tess tried on all the ones she wanted first, and she ended up being Desi from the weird sisters. Then it was my turn.

I tried on several costumes, but they all looked wrong. Finally, Tess made me try on a dark green Dress from like, the Middle Ages. I pulled it on, and she looked at it. "Yes, this is it." Tess said softly, and I looked at myself in the mirror. I guess I looked okay. I definitely didn't look bad. Tess made me spin around, and the she forced me to get it. I didn't really want to be something like that for Halloween (She said I could be a maiden) but I probably wouldn't find anything else. I bought a mask and we headed out.

Next, we went to find Tucker. As I was coming out of the store, I walked straight into David. "Sorry." I said, and he said, "No, it's my fault." Then he demanded to see my dress, so I showed it to him. "I think you will make an excellent maiden." He said, and then he sidled into the shop. Tess was grinning at me.

Once we found Tucker, we all went an got some candy from Honeydukes. I felt kind of like a third wheel with the two of them. They were trying to include me, but it didn't work very well. Finally, I left and went to the bookstore rather then follow them around. In there, I saw David come in behind me. I pretended I didn't see him, and I watched him out of the corner of my eye. He kind of glanced at me, and then sneaked sideways. I smiled to myself. He was following me.

I let him watch me for a little while, and then I decided to "notice" he was here. "David, Hi. What are you doing here?" I said, smiling at him. "Uhh, looking for music books for the band." He said. "Want to go get some ice cream?" I said, and he nodded, so we headed to the ice cream parlor. We sat down and started talking. Once we were done, it was time to go back to the school. As I stood up, his hand brushed against mine. I could feel it tingle. I was hoping he would hold my hand, but no such luck.

That night, once Tess unglued herself from Tucker's lips, I told her about what happened. She looked Happy for me, but it was dark, and I couldn't really tell, since we were going to bed. Who knows, maybe she was thinking about Tucker. I almost fell asleep when the bathroom door opened and light flooded into the room. I opened my eyes a crack and I saw Kelsey, she was crying. I almost asked her what was wrong, but thought better of it. She was always mean to me, so why should I care about her? I fell asleep then, and didn't hear Kelsey cry herself to sleep.

Sunday morning, I woke up late. Kelsey was in the bathroom, as usual. This time she took longer then usual, so by the time I got in there and out it was lunchtime. I was already in a very bad mood, so when I went to lunch, and Marissa said, "Shagged anyone good lately?" I just threw the bat boogey hex at her and left her in the common room screaming. Once I was down stairs, I found that Tess and Tucker hadn't saved me seat, and Sandy wasn't there, so I sat with Elizabeth. I don't like her that much, she is kind of snobby, but she is my cousin, so I knew that I could sit with her.

By that night, I was not having a good day. I couldn't concentrate, I kept blotting my homework, and everything that could go wrong did. Finally I went to the room of requirement. This time, it a beach. My mum took me and my brothers and sister to a beach in America once, and I loved it. I've only been once, but to feel the wakes wash over me again was wonderful. Finally, it got dark and I crawled up onto the sand and fell asleep.

When I woke up, I realized I was late. I magicked my clothes on and ran to my class. As I ran into to transfiguration, Professor McGonnagall surveyed me over her glasses. "Why are we late, Ms. Potter?" She said, and I mumbled, "I over slept." I quickly sat next to Tess, and got out my notes for class.

Friday morning dawned cold, but sunny. It was mine and Sirius's birthday." I'm fifteen finally!" I said to myself, as I got dressed. At breakfast, James and Remus wished me happy birthday; so did Tess, Tucker and a few other people. I looked over at Sirius. He had a pile of cards, and a fair few presents in front of him. When the mail came a little while later, there was some cards for me, but a whole lot for him. I saw my mom and Dad's present for him. It was a new broom.

I got a card from my grandparents, and from Fred and George, but that's it. Oh ya, and one from my parents. I almost cried when I got it. They wrote Sirius a long letter and actually thought about his present. My card said, _Happy Birthday Lily. Mom and Dad. _Really original. The present was fifteen galleons. Brooms cost a lot more.

Today we only had classes until one, and then they let us go. I ran up to my room to get ready. I was almost ready to get into the shower when I noticed a present on my bed. I opened it and it was a journal. I needed on to, since my other one was at the end. I opened it, and on the cover it said, _Happy birthday pretty girl. Hope to see you tonight! _I was almost positive it was David, and I hoped it was. I got into the shower grinning.

The ball wasn't until seven, but I was dressed and ready by four. I sat around and did nothing. I looked at myself in the bathroom, and then I looked down into the garbage can for some reason. There was a pregnancy test in it. I pulled it out. I know that's incredibly disgusting, but, hello! I wasn't just going to ignore it. I looked at it, and there was to little lines at one end. Someone was pregnant, and I was betting my fifteen birthday galleons that it's Kelsey.

At seven, Tess, Tucker and me made our way down to the dance floor. We had dinner first, and once we were done it was almost eight. I made my way to the ice sculptures. I could see someone, a boy, was standing there with his back turned. He looked tall, like David, and Handsome (From the back) like David. I was positive it was David. "My Secret Admirer?" I said, and he turned around. It wasn't David.

It was a boy that I'd met a few times named Alex. He was another Gryffendor sixth year, but I didn't really know him, but I think he's friends with David. Anyway, his face lit up when he saw me. "Hi! You came. Lily, you look beautiful." He said, and I couldn't help smiling. How could I have not noticed him before, he was so cute! "No. You and David are going to get together, remember? You loved him forever, and now you throwing it all away." That little voice in my head said, and I ignored it. I was definitely into Alex.

"Would you like to Dance?" He said, and I nodded. He led me onto the Dance floor, and we danced. He is an excellent Dancer. A slow song came on, and we slow danced. I was definitely falling for this guy, but how could I? I mean, I've been in love with David for so long, and now this new boy comes along and I like him. Maybe I was blinded so much by David that I didn't notice the other boys.

Alex and me danced together for the rest of the dance. Around ten, he leaned over and kissed me on the lips. My first kiss! It was just a quick peck on the lips. But it was still a kiss. "Lily, would you like to be my girlfriend?" he said softly in my ear. I inhaled softly, and Alex smelled delicious. I replied. "Okay." Super witty reply, but I didn't care. This guy seemed so wonderful. What happened after that wasn't so wonderful.

There was another slow song, and I was dancing with my head nestled in Alex's shoulder. I could see over his shoulder, and I saw David coming towards us. He had a smile on his face, and he was holding a rose. He saw me, and the smile slid off his face. He dropped the rose and almost ran in the other direction. I felt really bad, but hey, he forgot my birthday along with the rest of the world.

As the dance ended that night, Alex left for a minute to go do something or other. Then Sirius came up to me. "Hey sis, how's it going? Happy birthday. Oh, and tomorrow we have a band practice in the room of requirement around two, ok?" He said, and I said okay and wished him a happy birthday to.

Then the dance did end, and Alex came back to walk me back to the common room. I smiled at him, and we held hands. As we got to the portrait hole, He opened it for me and we went in. Then he walked me to the staircase, and then he leaned over and kissed me again, another peck. "Goodnight Lily." He said, and I said, "Goodnight Alex." Then I went to my dorm. Tess was there, awaiting the details. Kelsey was nowhere to be seen, as was Marissa. Other then my parents almost ignoring my birthday, it was an excellent birthday.

_A/N Did you like this chapter? I hope so. I bet I surprised you that the secret admirer wasn't David. I was planning on it to be, but things change. Please review! _


	7. Kelsey's Baby

A/N: Some one gave me a review about Ginny being a bitchy mom, and that's because she was so popular in her school days and she doesn't see how Lily could be so different. She just doesn't understand Lily.

_I loved the Harry Potter book, the sixth one. Read it all in one day thank you very much. I'm going to pretend that book didn't happen, so nothing really changes because of that book._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling does, and she is probably raking in millions of dollars because of her new book. Ya, so not me._

_Dedication: To the real Alex, who is nothing like his character._

That morning, I was absolutely ecstatic. I have a boyfriend! Tess was so happy for me. I was so happy that I wasn't mad a Molly for telling me that she was going to inform our dear mother of Alex. I didn't even care how she found out. I went down to the dining hall for lunch, and I found Alex had saved a seat for me. I went over and sat next to him. We talked for a long time, until almost everyone was gone. I told him I had to practice with my band, so he walked me over to the room of requirement. "See you later." He said, and he leaned down and kissed me, right as David was coming around the corner.

David turned slightly red, but didn't say anything. Alex had turned around and walked in the other direction, so he didn't see David. I went into the room of requirement, were Sirius and Gabe were already set up. Sirius pointed at the mike, telling me to warm up. We all did, for about ten minutes. Then we started practicing. David kept messing up on his drums, and I was getting irritated. Him messing up was making everybody else mess up to. Finally, Sirius proclaimed the practice over. He magicked the stuff away, and we left. Sirius caught up with me, and said, "What was up with you and David? Did something happen?" I shook my head, not feeling like informing him of the details. He didn't believe me, but he left.

I didn't want to go back to the common room, so instead I went to the library. There, I found Kelsey crying behind a bookshelf. Summoning up all of my courage, I went and asked her what was wrong. "I-I-I'm pregnant!" She said, a fresh wave of tears overtaking her. I was so taken aback that she taking to me normally and she didn't tell me to go away that I stared at her with my mouth open. I closed it once I realized what I was doing. As gently as I could, I asked, "Who's is it?" She stopped crying a bit, and she said with a shudder, "Brad Jacobson's."

"Have you told him?" I asked, and she shook her head.

"You're the first person I have told. I can't get an abortion, I have no money and I need parental consent. Please don't tell anyone!" Kelsey said.

I nodded. I wasn't going to tell anyone. "How far along are you?" I said, eying her abdomen.

Kelsey sighed, she had stopped crying, "About a month and a half. I went to a healer the other day, and she said the baby should be born in early June."

I got up to leave, and Kelsey stood up to. She hugged me, and again I was surprised. She left, and I walked back to the common room. I pondered all that Kelsey had told me. Her birthday is in May, making her sixteen when the baby would be born. I knew that Brad would deny the baby, and I actually felt bad for Kelsey. I was still thinking when I got to the common room, when two people yelling interrupted my thoughts.

I looked up and David and Alex were yelling at each other from across the room.

"You knew I liked her! Why did you have to send her those stupid letter things? I told back in September about how much I liked her, and you still went after her!" David yelled at Alex, who yelled back

"It's not my fault you didn't make a move. She liked you to, you know, but you couldn't see that, you couldn't open your eyes. No, you were to embarrassed about your pride, afraid she would turn you down. You wouldn't take that chance, but I did. I risked all me pride because I like her that much!"

I was awed. Alex must have really liked me. I watched David yell back. "I bet she doesn't even like you!" I knew he was only saying that because he didn't have anything to say back.

Alex yelled back at him, "Get over her! Lily is just a girl now, okay, she doesn't like you. She liked me, and I love her-" He stopped abruptly. He saw me. David did to. "Did-Did you hear all that?" Alex said, and I nodded.

David stalked off, leaving Alex and me alone, sorta. We were in the common room, after all. "I'm sorry about the fight." He said, and I nodded. Somehow, that fight seemed to offend me. A boy had never liked me in my life, and now I had to boys fighting over me like I was some prize. I told Alex that. He hugged me. "I'm sorry. I don't think of you like that at all." I smiled, and went up my dorm. Kelsey was there, and I smiled at her. She was staring at her abdomen. Knowing what she was thinking, I said, "You cannot tell. You look the same." She smiled at me. I could not believe we were have a conversation like we used to. Like friends.

I remember when Parvati was Jacob. She didn't show until about three months, but morning sickness a few weeks earlier. Kelsey groaned, and I knew what she was thinking again. She was a lot smaller then Parvati, meaning that she would show sooner. This conversation was so much like the one's we had in our first three years at Hogwarts that I was sad. I hadn't realized how much I had missed being friends. We actually talked until dinner, when I went down to get food and Kelsey stayed upstairs, deciding when to find out the baby's gender.

The next morning, I saw that Kelsey was going to be my friend again. She followed me around and sat with me everywhere. Tess was a little put out by her, but Kelsey was really acting nice, like she used to. I was amazed that a person could change so much basically over night. Marissa was mad at Kelsey for ignoring her, and so was the rest of Kelsey's little posse. I realized that Kelsey, Tess, Alex, Tucker and Me all got on really well. Kelsey didn't have a boyfriend, and I think that she was glad. I was worried that she would all of a sudden decide to be mean, but that never really happened.

Sunday night at lunch, Kelsey sat with Brad. She was telling him about the baby. I was sitting with Alex, Tess and Tucker. I stopped talking to Alex for a second to watch Kelsey tell Brad. As I expected, he denied it. I didn't expect him to yell it loud enough for the whole dining hall to hear.

"FOR THE LAST TIME, THAT DUMB BABY ISN'T MINE!" He screamed at her, and everyone looked. Kelsey had tears streaming down her face, and she got up and ran out of the room. I jumped up and followed her, and so did Marissa. We were basically racing each other back to the common room. We got there at the same time, and into the dorm at the same time. The first thing that Marissa did was run over to Kelsey, who was sitting on a bed, and hug her.

I turned around and was walking away. Clearly Kelsey saw me as her weird cousin again, or so I thought. "Wait Lils, don't go!" she called, and I turned around. Marissa was looking put out, and I went aver and sat next to Kelsey. Nobody had called me Lils since I was about ten. Right before I started Hogwarts was the last time someone called me that, as I proclaimed it childish. Struck by the memory of my old nickname, I barred Marissa for an hour and half before I had to get out of there. There is only so much you can take of Marissa.

I went down to the common room, where Tess was waiting for me. "What's up?" I said when I saw her, but she only frowned.

"How can you forgive all the things that Kelsey did just because she is pregnant?" She said coldly.

"She's my cousin, she's my Family. I can't just leave her when she needs someone." I said, trying to be nice. I got the feeling that Tess was jealous. She is an only child and her parents are muggles.

"So? You got in a fight with her! Just let her be depressed. She got herself into this position. Leave her alone!" she said. Then my temper was kicking in.

"Just because you have no cousins and muggle parents doesn't mean you have to be mad at me! It's not my fault I'm your best friend and my cousin needs me!" I said coldly, before I thought about what I was going to say.

"Well maybe I don't want to be best friends anymore." Tess said, and I could tell she was going to cry.

"Fine." I snapped.

"Fine." She replied, and she stalked away. I went to a table and pulled out my homework. I felt a tear roll down my face. Tess and I had been best friends since first year, and now we weren't best friends at all. I cried as I did my homework. David and I weren't friends and now neither was Tess and I. Kelsey and Brad hate each other, and so do David and Alex. I continued to cry softly until I felt someone put their arms around me from behind. I turned and saw Alex grinning at me. He saw my tear-stained face and the smile vanished.

"What's wrong Lily?" he said, sounding worried.

"Nothing." I said, some more tears leaking out. I got up and grabbed my stuff and ran up to my dorm. I didn't feel like telling anyone about Tess and me yet, I wanted to keep it to myself. I took a shower and decided to go to bed, even though it was early. I fell asleep right away, and I had dreams of Tess, Kelsey, a baby, Alex and David. I woke up with a weird feeling, that something wasn't right. I shook that feeling off, and fell back asleep.

When I woke up that morning, and felt like I was dreading something. I went down to breakfast, and ate. Right before I was about to go off to class, professor McGonnagall called me, Remus, Molly, Sirius and James all over to her.

"Please go see Professor Dumbledore in his office, he has some news for you." She said, sounding grave. I nervously followed James to his office and went inside. He saw use immediately.

"Please sit down." He said, and we did. Then, soon after, all of my cousins who go to Hogwarts came filing in. "I have something to tell you all. You dear grandfather Arthur has passed away. You all have permission to go home for this week for the funeral service and such. Please go pack your things and meet at the front gate in an hour, where somebody will escort you to the train station." Dumbledore said gravely.

I, and the rest of my family, all got up to go to our dorms. All of us are miraculously in Gryffendor. The sorting hat was going to put me in Ravenclaw, but I begged it to put me into Ravenclaw so my parents wouldn't be disappointed. Anyway, as I walked back to my dorm, I started crying. My poor grandpa, he had been so nice to me. He was always making me laugh, and he would never do that again… I started crying more, but I pulled myself together to get ready. I packed a quick suitcase full of stuff I would need, but I had clothes at home, so I didn't need too much.

Kelsey didn't talk much as we walked down to the gates with everyone. I knew what she was thinking about telling her mom and dad about the baby. If you looked really closely at her stomach, you could see it was slightly not flat. I doubted that her mom was going to take a magnifying glass and look, but that didn't stop Kelsey from worrying.

As we got onto the train, I told her, "Don't worry, it will be fine."

She smiled weakly and sat down next to me. I really hoped everything would be fine. My mom was probably still mad at me for be and Kelsey's fight. 'Whatever. I don't care' I thought. I couldn't wait to see my dad. He's really pretty cool. It does get annoying to have people following him everywhere, but I still love being around him. Anyway, as the train slowed down, I looked out the window. There was my mum and Dad. Mum was looking very said and so was Dad. I was sad to. I took a deep breath and got up, wondering what my mum would criticize about me today.

A/N: Hoped you like this chapter. Please review. I got one review last chapter, and a big thanks to that reviewer. The next chapter might be up a little later, my apologies. Thank you if you review.


	8. Runaway

A/N: Thank you to my reviewers for the last chapter, I really appreciate them. Here is the next chapter.

_Disclaimer: Do you seriously think I own Harry Potter? I don't think so._

_Dedication: To Love, how happy it can make you._

I got off the train with my siblings and walked over to my mum. She hugged each of us in turn, and she didn't say anything mean to me at all. I noticed my dad eyeing my dark red hair, but he didn't say anything. We walked back to the car they had borrowed from the ministry, and we went home. Once we got there, I ran down to my basement room. I took it all in, I missed it so much. I flopped onto my bed. My room is dark red, and so us most of the stuff in it. I do have a black piano, a blue guitar and a microphone.

I laid on my bed for about an hour, just thinking about my grandpa, when my mum came down stairs. I noticed that she looked really tired. "Lily, the funeral is tomorrow at one. Please look presentable." She said, and I jumped up and hugged her. She looked surprised, but she hugged me back. "I love you mum." I said, and she said, "I love you to." And walked back up the stairs. I knew that my mum needed me then, and it was not the time to be the usual sullen teenager that I become at home.

The rest of the day I did nothing. I got an owl from Alex, wondering where I was, one from Kimmy, asking the same thing, and one from my teachers giving me all my homework. People kept popping in, saying how sorry they were for our loss. It started to get annoying. My mum was to tired to cook anything for dinner, so my dad went to the muggle pizza shop and brought home a couple of pizzas. I wasn't hungry though. All I could think about was my grandpa and home my grandma was doing. Finally, I went to bed, tired from doing nothing.

The next day, I woke up late, eleven. I was surprised my mom let me do that, she never does normally. I got up and looked through my closet. I pulled out a black dress, and put it on. Then I did my hair nice. I went downstairs. I noticed today that my mum didn't look nearly as tired and helpless as she did yesterday. She seemed to be in a better mood. She looked at me over her coffee, and she seemed to notice my hair for the first time.

"What did you do to your hair?" she said, and I looked at my hands. Her tone said she thought it was ugly.

"I dyed it and cut it." I said unhappily.

"Well, I think it's-" "Beautiful." My dad came in and finished for her. She didn't say anything back, and neither did I. By that time it was time to go to the funeral. All of us piled into the rented car and went to the funeral. We got there, and people spoke about him. My dad spoke about him, saying he was like a father to him. I started crying about half way through. Once people were done speaking, we went outside to watch him being lowered into the ground. This was very horrible to watch, and I chose to close my eyes.

Once it was over, we went back to my house. I went down to my bedroom and played my piano. I was playing a sad song to match my mood when my mum came down stairs. "Turn that racket off right now! I don't want to listen to your constant playing, it's horrible. And dye your hair back, it's ugly." She snapped at me. Tears started flowing.

I knew my mom was probably just sad about her dad and taking it out on me, but I didn't care. Some more stuff started to come out of her mouth, and I started to get really mad. Next thing I knew, my mom was dripping in chocolate sauce! Some how I had managed to conjure chocolate sauce out of thin air and dump it on her. Anyway, my mom blinked for a second, and she began screaming at me again. I couldn't take it anymore. I jumped up and ran out of the house. I had no idea why I was even remotely happy to come home. This is what it was like all summer.

I had changed out of my dress and wore some muggle jeans and a sweatshirt. I was freezing out side, it was very cold for November. I ran away from my house, I ran until I tripped and ripped my jeans. I didn't get up for a few minutes, I just sat there. My mum had gone to far. She is always putting me down, and this was too much. Most of the time she doesn't mean it, but this she did. I never wanted to go back there again. I knew I would have to eventually, but I really didn't want to. All I had was my wand and a couple of galleons. Finally, after a lot of debating, I decided to walk to Parvati and Ron's house.

"Lily! Come in, what are you doing here? The funeral ended a few hours ago and you miss us already?" Parvati said, smiling. I didn't smile back. The bump that was the baby was getting bigger; she was due in a month. Ron came into the room to see who came in, and when he saw me, he raised his eyebrows.

"Lily? Would you like to tell me why you're here? Parvati, dear, could you leave us alone for a little while?" He said, and Parvati left. He took me to the sitting room. Their house elf brought some tea. I took one sip of the tea, and the tears started flowing again. I told Ron everything about what happened. He nodded.

"Can I stay here? Please? And please don't tell my mother that I'm hear, let her worry about me for awhile." I said, with more bitterness in my voice then I meant.

"Okay, Lily. You can stay. Go up to Jessica's room, you can stay there. If your mother comes looking for you, I'm not sure if I wont tell her that you're here. We'll see, okay?"

I nodded. A place to stay was good. I went up to Jessica's room and sat on the bed. It was dark and rainy outside. I changed into some of Parvati's pajamas that she had lent me, and I fell asleep immediately.

The next morning, I awoke to the sound of someone crying. With m eyes closed, I listen. With a shock I realized it was my mother, talking to Ron.

"Have you seen her Ron? I said some very harsh things that I didn't mean last night and she ran out crying and I haven't seen her since… What if she is on the streets dead somewhere? What if one of the remaining Death Eaters got her, since they want revenge on Harry so bad… Please Ronnie, tell me you've seen her!" My mother cried hysterically.

I snapped my eyes open. I had never heard my mother's voice so full of fear. I really thought that she didn't care, but here she was, out looking for me. I decided that maybe my mom wasn't as out to get me as I thought, but I really didn't want to go home. I knew that Ron was going to tell her that I was here. I jumped out of bed, and changed into my old clothes. I grabbed my wand and climbed out the window.

Just as I hopped to the ground from the trellis, I heard them open the door to my room. I got up and ran. I ran all the way to the train station. I had just enough money to buy a train ticket to London, which is what I bought. I got the ticket, and in no time I was in London.

I walked around for a while, looking for the Leaky Cauldron. Finally, after an hour of searching, I found it. I went inside to use their fireplace. I was going to floo to Fred and George's shop. I didn't want to walk through the streets, afraid to see someone looking for me. I got some floo powder and threw it into the fireplace. "Weasley's Wizard Wheezes!" I said clearly, and I began zooming. I panicked though, wondering if Fred and George would send me home, and fell out to early. I did not like were I ended up.

I looked unhappily around Knockturn Alley. I had never been here before, but I knew this was what it was. It had to be. I had no idea which direction was Diagon alley, so I chose to go right. It was clearly not the right way. I walked for a few minutes before turning around. The shops were getting more and more filthy and dark looking. When I turned around, I walked right into a woman with black and gray hair, and heavily lidded eyes. She looked familiar, but I dismissed it. "'Scuse me." I said, trying to keep going,

"No, Excuse me, my pretty. What is little miss Lily Potter doing back here in the dark alley? Why don't you come along with me, out of the darkness." She said, and she out her hand on my shoulder. Next thing I knew, Bellatrix Lestrange was leading me further and further into Knockturn alley, then onto streets with very dirty looking houses. She took me to one house and shoved me into it. By now I was shaking so bad that I could barely breath. Bellatrix might try to kill me.

She bound me and gagged me. She whistled, and quite a few old death eaters came in. I noticed a few of the younger one's from my dad's school pictures: Crabb, Goyle, Zambini, Flint. They all looked scary, but Flint was what scared me the most. He was looking at me with this look of longing, like he wanted to feel me up or something. I was shaking.

"Now, we are going to get revenge on Mr. Potter by ruining his eldest daughter's life. No, missy, they aren't going to kill you. Just maybe rape you." Bellatrix said with such calmness, like it happened everyday.

I whimpered softly as she stunned me, then pulled the ropes off me. "Flint, she's all yours." Bellatrix said softly.

Flint came over and yanked off my pants, then my underwear. "Your beautiful." He commented, looking at me. Then he pulled down his pants. His thick erection sprang foreword. I looked away. We were the only two in the room, everybody else left. He began thrusting himself into me, trying to break my barrier. When he finally broke threw, I screamed in pain. This hurt more then anything I had ever experienced. He thrusted harder and harder, and I was sobbing. By then the stunning spell had worn off, so I kneed him in the face. He fell backwards and swore. I could feel semen and blood drip from between my legs.

Flint got up and slapped me across the face, very hard. He roughly thrust his erection into me one more time, then left me in the room to cry, which I did for several hours. It took a few hours for me to stop bleeding. I found a towel next to me, which I wiped the inside of my legs clean. I winced every time the cloth hit my thigh; it hurt a lot. I pulled up my underwear, then my pants. I cried even harder when I did this, it was painful. Once I did this, I just lay on the ground crying, hoping for someone to rescue me.

Nobody did. Night fell, and I fell asleep. Cleary all the Death eaters had left me there, in hopes I would starve or something. I couldn't move, I was so sore. When morning came and I woke up, I wasn't as sore as before, but I couldn't move. I was guessing that Flint had put some sort of spell on me so I couldn't move. So I didn't; I just laid there, most of Thursday, praying for a rescue.

_A/N: A lot of Drama in this chapter. Please review. I'm not sure how much I like this chapter, or if I even like it at all, so please tell me what you think._


	9. Going Back

_A/N: Than you to my reviewers for last chapter, I appreciate it very much. Thank you to the reviewer who said that at first people would think that Kelsey was getting fat, I never thought of that._

_Disclaimer: 'I own Harry Potter' Wakes up from dream Darn it, I don't._

_Dedication: Hmmm…To the Game of Speed. I played 31 games of speed when I went camping, and it passed a lot of time._

I lay on the floor crying softly, until about five on Thursday night, when I was finally rescued. Dumbledore, My father, and a few aurors came to get me. All I remember is my dad spotting me on the ground, scooping me up, and we were at St. Mungo's. They gave me a potion there, and I fell asleep.

When I woke up the next morning, my mum was next to my bed crying. The recent events came flooding into my mind. My mum looked up and saw that I was awake. "Oh, Honey, I'm so sorry about everything I said. It's all my fault. If I would have just not taken my anger out on you this never would have happened! I'll never forgive my self!" My mother was crying hysterically. I was slightly alarmed, but right then a healer came in.

"Mrs. Potter, I'm afraid that you have to leave. I need to talk to Lily." The healer said politely, and my mum got up and left, still crying.

The healer took the chair were my mum had been sitting. "Now Lily, we put you in an enchanted sleep and found out exactly what happened, so there is no need to recount that experience again." The healer said, and I didn't bother tell her that the experience was playing over and over in my head already.

"We have checked you out, and you're not pregnant, and you have no damage in your vaginal area. The damage is emotional. We suggest that you have counseling twice a week here for an hour or so." The healer was trying to make it sound like she knew what I was going through right now, but she had no idea. I just nodded.

"You may go home later today, and if you like you may go back to school on Monday. Only if you want to." The healer said, and I nodded again, finally, she left me in peace, which was what I wanted.

Once I was sure she was gone and not coming back, I let myself cry. I wasn't a virgin anymore. I was dirty, no boy would like me now, I thought.

All day, I just wanted to go home. When I finally could, I cheered. When I got out of bed to walk to my mum, I winced. My thighs were so sore that I sat back down. I got up a second time and walked slowly over to my mom. My dad had the car. It took awhile to get there, but the longer I walked the easier that it got. When we got to the car, I sat down slowly. My dad kept glancing in his mirror back at me. He stopped and picked up some Mexican food for me, my favorite.

When we got home, everybody was waiting for me. James was looking livid, angry that someone would do that to his little sister. Sirius was looking really worried. Remus was looking kind of scared, and Molly looked all three at the same time. When I walked in, Sirius ran to me and hugged me. Molly was next. She hugged me so tightly that I could barely breath. We are the same height, even though I'm older. Anyways, once everyone was done hugging me, Molly helped me down stairs and to my bed.

"If you need anything, just call my name." She said, and I nodded. She left. We hadn't got along like that in a really long time. Still, everybody being so nice to me didn't erase the memory, but for once I was glad that my Family was mine.

The rest of the weekend, I did nothing, just sat around. I sent a few owls, but none to Alex or Tess. It was really painful not to have a best friend to help me through this, but I was doing fine without her. I didn't want to even think about Alex. Since I was…raped, I didn't trust any guys outside of my family. I hadn't even talked to Alex, and I was afraid to trust him. If Flint could do this to me, then he could to, and that was what I was afraid of.

When Sunday night came, it was time to go back to school. Despite my mum and dad telling me to stay, I chose to go back to school. I missed it, and I missed my classes. When I got back to school and went to Dinner, everyone looked at me. There was a lot of whispering going on, and I knew that some how everyone knew. I groaned, realizing how some of them knew. They had printed it in the news. Harry Potter's Daughter raped by Death Eater!

I looked around for Tess, but I didn't see her. I did see Alex, and David, but I chose to sit with Kelsey. I told Kelsey what happened, with out the details. If felt so weird to be telling Kelsey things again, like we did when we were younger. Anyway, she told me that her mom didn't even notice that her stomach was getting bigger. You could tell a little more now, but I noticed that it looked like she was getting fat rather the pregnant.

I got up when I was done sitting, (I didn't eat anything) and went to go to the common room. Alex got up to follow me, and I sped up my pace a bit. He kept following, and eventually he caught up with me. He looked solemn.

"Lily, I heard about what happened, and I-" I cut him off by saying, "I know that you don't want to be with me now. Don't worry, I get it. I'll do you the favor by telling you that we can't be together. Not now, that I'm dirtied by Flint." I said, starting to cry.

"Lily that's not what I was going to say…" He trailed off. I had run up the hall, away from him and away from my fears

I went up to my dorm, to find Tess in it. She was still mad at me, apparently. I went and locked myself in the bathroom and cried my eyes out. All I had been doing was cry lately, it was like someone had opened the floodgates. I was in there for an hour when Tess banged on the door.

"Are you done? I need to take a shower!" She yelled through the door, and I opened it. Tess saw my red eyes, and I'm pretty sure she knew I'd been crying. She opened her mouth to say something, but I pushed past her and went to my bed. I wrenched the hangings shut, put a silencing spell around them, and once again I cried myself to sleep.

The next morning, going to classes was horrible. Well, maybe it wasn't so bad, but still, it wasn't fun. Alex followed me everywhere, trying to talk to me, Tess was still mad at me, and whispers followed me everywhere. One good thing is that Professor McGonnagall actually gave me a break on my homework. She smiled at me. I think she felt sorry for me.

Snape, however, was quite the opposite. He glared in my direction, and when he asked for my homework, and I didn't have it, he sneered, "Well, lets see. Twenty points from Gryffendor." He said nastily, and I scowled. He grinned evilly, and he flicked his wand, and the directions for whatever potion we were making went onto the board.

I read the directions first, and started to make my potion. By the end of class, I was pretty proud of myself. I had made the potion exactly how it was suppose to be made, and it was the correct color for once: salmon pink. Snape swept by it, scowling. He didn't criticize any thing. When I left potions, I was in an okay mood. I hadn't even been in a remotely good mood since…I don't even remember.

The next morning, I had an owl from mum asking how I was doing. She also sent me a form that said my first counseling appointment would be tonight. I would floo from the common room at eight and come back at nine thirty. I groaned. I did not want to go to counseling, but I knew that it could help me put what happened in the past.

That night, when I flooed from the common room, Tess was watching me. I didn't care. She heard me say, "Counseling room." When I got to the room, there was a witch sitting in the chair. "Please sit down." She said in a pleasant voice. I sat, and read her nameplate: Lavender Brown. My dad said something about her once. Back in sixth year, apparently, Lavender and Ron were going out and Hermione was jealous and Lavender and Ron broke up and Hermione and Ron got together. I almost smiled at the memory.

"Now, is there anything you want to talk about?" she said pleasantly, and I nodded. "I would like to know why you and my uncle broke up." I said, and she actually smiled. "Because I was mad at him for all the time he spent with Hermione. Neither of us ended up with Ron though. My best friend got him." She said, and I gasped. "You and Parvati were best friends? I never knew that." I said, and we sat there and talked for the full hour and a half about what my parents and my mum's brothers were like.

When I left, I called, "See you Saturday night." That's when the next session was, and surprisingly, I actually liked them. I had laughed twice, when I thought I would never laugh again. Anyway, when I got back to the common room through the fire, Tess was there. I walked past her, when she called, "Lily? Where did you go?" her voice was sort of friendly. I turned around, said, "Counseling." And kept walking. She jumped up and followed me.

"For what?" she said, and all of a sudden I realized that she didn't know that I was raped. The tears started flowing, and she hugged me tightly. I relayed the whole story to her, and in the end she was crying with me. "I'm sorry for being mad at you! If I would have known, I would have-" "It's okay." I cut her off.

We hugged for a long time. Finally, I told her that I broke up with Alex. She nodded. "Ya, Tucker told me that. Him and Alex are friends. Tucker was looking for you so he could tell you something." She said, her voice still a little wobbly. We were talking for a few minutes, when Alex came through the portrait hole. I saw him, got up and ran to my dorm. He called my name, but I ignored it.

Tess came up about ten minutes later. She came over and sat next to me, saying "Look out for David. He thinks that you broke up with Alex because you didn't like him, so he wants to get with you." I groaned. The last thing I needed right now was to be courted by two boys. One was bad enough.

Tess and me sat up for a long time talking. Kelsey came in soon afterward, and she went to bed. Marissa came up around eleven when we were going to bed. She scowled at both of us, but she didn't say anything for once. When I crawled into bed and thought about all that had happened today, I realized that the day hadn't been to bad. Actually, it had been an almost good day. I wasn't sure I would ever have a good-_good, _because the memory of that night would haunt me forever.

_A/N: So, tell me what you think of the last two chapters. I'm not sure how much I like them, but I would like your opinion._


	10. David

_A/N: Thanks to my faithful reviewers! I really appreciate your reviews!_

_Disclaimer: Nope, don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To the scholastic pronunciation dictionary thingy for Harry Potter. I just found out that I had been pronouncing Avada Kedavra wrong the whole time…_

The rest of the week passed with no major incident. Kelsey was now going to Madam Pomfrey once a week to check on the baby; Her parents still didn't know. I was still being followed around by whispers everywhere. I did get some letters at home, from my father's fans, saying how sorry they were for me. I found that rather unnerving; some of the letters weren't good, they were saying how they wouldn't mind doing the same thing…

Alex continued to follow me around, and he was joined, much to my dismay, David. I still liked Alex, but I was falling for David again too. I didn't want to get with either of them. I wasn't sure if I ever wanted to be with a boy again. My counseling sessions were good, but we were now starting to talk about what happened. My Counseling session on Wednesday of the following week was not a good one.

"-And that's what happened." I finished recounting to Lavender, sobbing. She told me that it would be all right, but it wouldn't be. How could she have made me recount the entire rape all over again? She already knew that I was afraid of boys, afraid that they would do something. Lavender wrote something down, and she came over and sat next to me. We had become friends, and she stroked my hair, telling me it's okay to cry, which I did for a long time.

When I was done crying, she didn't get up. She said, "Do you know why they sent you to me?" she asked, and I shook my head miserably.

"Because I am an expert on rape cases of teens." She said, barely above a whisper.

This comment made me mad. How could she be an expert? It's not like she was raped. I told her this, my rage very apparent. She looked at me very sadly, and it became clear. She _was _raped. "Who did it?" I asked quietly, praying it wasn't Ron.

"Marcus Flint, the same person as you. Except I wasn't as lucky. I became pregnant." She said softly. I gasped. "Well, I was eighteen and fresh out of Hogwarts. I had the baby. That was around twenty years ago, and my daughter is the most wonderful daughter ever. She is getting married soon, and she would like you to come to the wedding." Lavender had started crying, and I was crying again to.

"I'm so sorry for being mean." I said, and she nodded.

"It's about time for you to be going back." She said, and I got up. "See you on..?" I said, and she answered, "Sunday evening, around eightish." I left and flooed back to Hogwarts.

When I got back to the Hogwarts common room, Tess was waiting for me in tears. Actually, she was in the dormitory. "What's wrong?" I said, and Tess blurted out the whole story. Apparently her and Tucker had a fight, and they weren't speaking to each other. "A-A-And that's not even the w-worst part!" she sobbed. "He-He called me a-a-a good for nothing tramp!"

I hugged her. I could not imagine sweet Tucker doing this to her. He had always seemed so shy, but now he broke Tess's heart. I knew that there was probably more to the story that I would find out later. I did my best to console her until she finally gave up and went to bed, in which I left to go find Tucker.

I found him in the common room, brooding. He was one of the few boys that I have any trust left for. "Hi." I said, and he looked up. Before I could say anything else, he blurted out his entire side of the story. Apparently, Tess wasn't as innocent as she told me. She had called him a "Bad-Breathed Troll". I hid one of my rare smiles when Tucker told me. Their fight was over the stupidest thing: If Charms or Transfiguration was a better subject. Apparently it heated up from a discussion to and argument to a yelling fight. I rolled my eyes. "You two work this out, don't drag me into it." I told him.

He looked at me rather oddly. "What about you and Alex? You should hear how much he misses you and loves you. He goes on and on about it." He told me, and I was surprised. I hadn't thought he liked me anymore. "I'm going to bed." Tucker told me, leaving me to be lost in my thoughts. It was around eleven, so I figured I wouldn't be disturbed much. There were only a few people left in the common room, so I went to a corner and sat down. I was soon, much to my dislike, joined by David.

"Hey…" He said softly, and I mumbled a reply. I didn't want to talk to him. I was afraid. I had only been two weeks since the rape, and if he thought I was ready to start a relationship with a guy, he was wrong. "Listen, I know you probably don't trust guys, but I have liked you since we were kids, before we even started Hogwarts." He told me. I looked up. I hadn't known he liked me for so long. Almost forgetting about…everything, I asked him "When did you start liking me?"

"Since you were seven and I was eight and Sirius dared us to kiss." He replied, and I couldn't help but laugh. I had forgotten about that. We had kissed, and it was a disaster. Everyone was watching, and they all laughed. I ran off to my room and cried, and David came down to comfort me.

"I liked you to. I liked you since you left for Hogwarts…" I told him. I was amazed. He had like me even longer then I liked him. I looked at my hands. David scooted over and put his arm around me, but I cringed like being burned. David withdrew his arm immediately.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think…" he said, and I could feel the tears coming. Being touched by a guy like that outside of my family was still amazingly painful, and emotional. I had prayed for David to notice me for so long, and now that he did, I wanted nothing to do with him. I got up, said goodnight, and went up to my dorm, where I promptly fell asleep with my clothes still on.

When I woke up the next morning, I was in a horrible mood. I have no idea why, I just was. Everything was going wrong for me today. By lunchtime, my temper was running high. Isabelle Lestrange(Bellatrix Lestrange's only child), another fifth year, was making fun of my like crazy for no apparent reason. Finally I stalked off, and she followed me. I could here her taunting me, so I whirled around and shot the tickling hex at her. She jumped out of the way just in time.

"Oh, you want to play, Miss Lily?" she sneered, and sent a hex back at me. It went on like this for a few minutes, until I hit her head on with a jelly legs curse. She swore angrily, and shouted, "Sectumsempra!"

I felt something, the curse I assume, hit me hard in the face, and whatever it was, was sharp. Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital wing. I looked at the clock, it was half past three. I had been in here three hours. Madam Pomfrey saw that I was awake, and she bustled over to take my temperature. "Good, Good." She murmured.

I picked up the mirror from the bedside table and looked at myself. There was a slight scar on my forehead. Almost like my dads. "Is that going to go away?" I asked with a quavering voice, and Madam Pomfrey nodded. "It should go away soon enough." She said.

I just noticed that there was an envelope on the bedside table, next to the mirror. I picked it up, interested. Inside, it was my punishment for dueling (a detention and twenty points from Gryffendor). I read down a little ways, and saw Isabelle's punishment. It was much more official looking: Suspended for one week for use of a banned spell on a fellow student; ten detentions; fifty points from Slytherin.

"Wow!" I thought. I knew that Isabelle didn't see her mother very often. I knew where she learned that spell though. It had to be form her mother. Maybe something good had come out of all this. I didn't have to deal with Isabelle very often, mostly she left me alone. But now she had detention for two weeks, and she was suspended. I lay back onto my pillows, and enjoyed my time off.

Around four, a flood of visitors came in for me. First Tess and Kimmy were there with my homework, then Kelsey, then Molly, then Sirius, then Alex. "Hi." I said, trying to sound all faint.

"Hi." He said back. He hesitated, and then said, "Lily, why don't you want to be with me any more? I love you so much, and I would never hurt you. I swear." He said in a rush. I nodded, but I didn't believe him. For some reason, I did not like him at all anymore. It's like I considered it his fault that I was raped. I didn't tell him this, but I didn't really want to talk to him.

He left a little while later, and David came to visit me. He handed me a get-well card, and I smiled at him. He touched the scar on my forehead. "Ouch. When do you get out?" He asked, and I smiled again. He was worried, I could tell.

"I can go to lessons tomorrow, but I have to stay the night." I told him. "Well, I hope you get better soon. See you around." He said, and he left, leaving me to be rather bored.

I was glad to go back to Lessons Friday morning. I know that I had hardly been out of class, but it was still extremely boring lying there doing nothing. Tess and Tucker still hadn't made up, unfortunately. I could tell that the both of them wanted to be back in each other's arms, but neither of them wanted to apologize first. It was driving me mad, and finally, at lunch, I dragged the two of them into an empty classroom and sat each of them in a chair, back to back. They were both glaring at me, but neither of them complained.

I stood there staring at them, finally saying, "Apologize to each other. It doesn't matter who goes first." The both continued to be silent, but the silence was broke with Tess crying. "I'm sorry!" she cried, and she was sobbing. Tucker looked so ashamed of himself. He jumped up and wrapped his arms around Tess, saying, "Don't cry, it's okay. I'm so sorry." I was standing there, dumbstruck. I hadn't really expected my plan to work this well, but it did. I watched them for a while, then left to get lunch on my own.

When I got back to lunch, Kelsey was there. She looked really happy about something. She grinned at me, and said, "Matt is going to be the father in this baby's life, since Brad is insistent that he wants nothing to do with it." I smiled at her, and then looked over at Matt. I never really liked Matt that much, but I couldn't help but admire him. I know that it is a lot of work to raise a baby while still in school, yet he was taking on the responsibility for a baby that wasn't his. He was talking to David about something. David looked over my way, saw me looking at the two of them, and he grinned at me. Surprisingly, my stomach made that fluttering feeling like it used to when I saw David…

_A/N: Please review; I would like it a lot. Any suggestions are welcome._


	11. My One True Love

_A/N: Thank you to my reviewers, I appreciate it. _

_Disclaimer: Once again, I don't own Harry Potter_

_Dedication: To my reviewers; thanks_

One month later… 

I watched Hogwarts fade from view as I sat on the train going home for Christmas. Tess and Tucker were intertwined together in one seat. I was sitting next to them, and Kelsey was supposed to be next to me, but she was in the bathroom, throwing up; morning sickness had kicked in. Across from me, David, Sirius and Matt were playing some card game. I watched David, and he caught my eye and grinned. I blushed. I couldn't believe I was feeling like this, I was feeling, well, normal.

When the train slowed down, I looked out and spotted my parents. I looked over at Kelsey. Her little bump had gotten bigger, now it looked like she was pregnant. She had a determined look on her face. She had told me that she was going to tell her mum over vacation…

I got off the train with Sirius and walked over to my mum and dad. My mum hugged me, then my dad. We walked to our car, and then went home. When I got there, I ran to my room. I was so happy to see my room; I love it. It was the twenty-third, which made tomorrow Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve is when my family holds it's big get-together. It my favorite time, since I get to see all of my cousins. This year it's at our house. Hermione and Draco come to, with their kids. That means that David is going to be there.

The next morning, Molly and Me had to help clean the house. It took a long time, since Molly didn't know much magic and I was daydreaming. By the time our house was ready, it was three o'clock. Normally, people start coming at around five, so I went down to my room and lay on my bed. I was tired from doing all that cleaning, and it didn't help that I had stayed up till three the night before, then was rudely awoken at seven…

Next thing I knew, David was shaking me awake. "Hi sleepyhead." He said, grinning. I smiled back and sat up in bed. I took out my wand and mumbled a few spells so I looked presentable, then went upstairs to greet my family.

Once I was up there, I noticed that Parvati was the center of the party. She was holding a small bundle, and then I realized that she had her baby. I walked over to her, and she smiled happily at me. "Meet Ella Marie Weasley." She said proudly, indicating the sleeping baby in her arms. I smiled at the baby and walked around, talking to everyone. I was amazed at how normal I felt, almost as if I had never been raped. But it was still there, the memory. It would never go away.

The whole night was wonderful. Everyone chatted away. I saw Kelsey was having fun, but I was guessing that she hadn't told her mom about the baby yet. I walked around chatting with everyone. After awhile, I sat down on a couch and was soon joined by David. "Hi." He said, and I smiled at him. He smiled back

Soon, we were in conversation, we talking for almost an hour. By then, my family slowly started to leave, one family at a time. Soon, Hermione's family, Ron's family and my family were the only ones left. David got up. He offered his hand to pull me up. I took it, but he didn't let go right away. He looked up, "Mistletoe." He said, and I looked up too. When I looked back down, David kissed me. I almost considered pushing him away, but I didn't. It was a wonderful kiss, and it went on for a long time. When he pulled away, I whispered, "Wow."

David laughed. "I wanted to do that for a long time." He said, and I sighed happily. Alex and the rape were the farthest things on my mind at the moment. He hugged me, but then his mom called him over, telling him it was time to go. "I'll try to visit you tomorrow." He promised, and he left. I sighed again in happiness. I hadn't been this happy in a long time.

That morning, I woke up happy. As I opened my presents at the foot of my bed, I came to one from Alex. _To my Love_ it said, and it was a necklace with a heart on the end. I felt a stab of guilt. Alex still liked me, but I liked David. I felt bad for Alex, but still, I couldn't really help whom I liked. "You know that's not true." Said that voice in the back of my head. Its just Alex wasn't The One anymore…

Around lunchtime, David came over to visit. "Hey" he said when he saw me. He walked over and hugged me, and I hugged him back. We went outside for a walk around our garden. We walked for a little while and talked a bit. I was freezing, so David took off his cloak and put it around me. I smiled at him, and he smiled back. We walked for a little longer, and then we went inside. David said he had to go, and I was disappointed. But, before he left, he whispered into my ear, "Would you like to be my girlfriend?"

Before I could think about what it, I nodded my head, David's girlfriend that was something that I had wanted to be forever. He kissed me softly, and then left. I went down to my room and laid on my bed. As I lay there and thought about it, I could feel regret starting to sink in. What if David tried to do something like Flint had? I know he wouldn't do that, but Flint had made me so untrustworthy of everyone…

That night, I had an owl from David: _Please don't tell any of your family that we are together. My mum and your dad would go ballistic. I don't care if you tell people at school, but don't tell your family, I'm begging you. Love, David. _I smiled to myself. I knew that Hermione would love for her best friend's daughter to get with her son, as my dad would love it to. My mum would give me all these safe sex tips. I didn't even want to think about what would happen if I told my parents.

The next morning, I got up early. I had all this pent up energy from laying around the day before. I grabbed my room and zoomed into the garden. I fooled around for quite a long time; it was lunchtime when I went in. I put my broom away. I was amazed that I had spent that much time out there; normally I don't spend more then an hour or two on it. I went inside and had lunch with my mum and Molly. I was on my way downstairs when I heard a knock on our door.

I turned around and saw my mum open the door for Kelsey's mum Ashlee. "Uh-Oh." I said, and sidled out of the room. I knew that my mum was going to kick me out anyway. On a sudden inspiration, I flooed to the top floor and found the box with invisibility cloak in it. I crept back downstairs to listen to what they were saying.

When I peeked around the corner, I could tell that they had just started talking. My mum had gotten Ashlee some tea, since she was looking rather ill. "She's Pregnant Ginny! Kelsey's pregnant" Ashlee burst out. My mum, however, just nodded. "She is only fifteen! My little girl, have a baby of her own! Oh, and the father doesn't want it. What am I supposed to do?" Ashlee wailed like a little girl. Then she said something surprising, that I didn't know.

"I don't want her to turn out like me." She whispered fearfully. After listening for several more minutes, I got the whole story. Ashlee had never finished Hogwarts because she was pregnant at fifteen like Kelsey. She took care of the baby until it was three, then the baby's father got full custody. I couldn't believe that my totally together Aunt Ashlee had been pregnant that young… I was guessing that I was the only one who knew.

I crept back out of the kitchen and was tucking the invisibility cloak out of sight when my dad came. I didn't hide the cloak fast enough and he spotted it. "Where did you get that?" he asked, and I told him. He didn't look surprised. I thought that it was just there from the previous owners of the house, so I was very surprised when my dad said, "Consider it yours. It was mine when I was a kid, and now you can have it. I'm guessing that you have the marauder's map to, as that has been missing for quite sometime." He said, winking at me. I nodded sheepishly, and hurried away to my room.

A few days later, on New Year's Day, I was back at Hogwarts. I sat at a table and was doing the homework that I had neglected during the first week. I was struggling to finish a potions essay when David came up. "It's a pinch of mandrake root, not leech juice." He said, reading over my shoulder. I stuck my tongue out at him and continued to finish my essay, though I corrected the mistake. When I was finished, David was still next to me doing his own homework. "Come on, let's get some dinner." He said, and took my hand. He led me not to the dining hall, but to the kitchens.

"What are we doing here?" I asked, confused. He pointed to a little table with two chairs lit by candles. I laughed and sat down at one of the chairs. A house elf by the name of Dobby came over to get us our food. When he came back with our food, he was saying in his squeaky little voice, "I remember you father coming down here, miss. And your mother to." He said to David and me. We looked at each other. So our parents came down to the kitchens to?

"Yes, Hermione tried to persuade the house elves to go for freedom. She doesn't understand we are happy…" Dobby said, reminiscing. I giggled and finished my dinner as Dobby told us stories about our parents. By the time I left, I was in an extremely good mood. David and me walked up to the common room. I had to do an essay for charms. I didn't notice Alex until I almost walked into him. "Hi." I said to him. His didn't return the greeting. His eyes traveled from our faces to mine and David's hands, which were interlinked. He looked rather angry. He turned around and stalked off.

David and I continued our walk to the common room, though we were much quieter. When we got there, I whispered to David, "I'm really sorry about coming between you and Alex." He looked at me as if I was being insane. "It isn't your fault at all. I was jealous first, now he's the jealous one." He told me soothingly, but I looked down at my hands. I looked at my watch, and all of a sudden something dawned on me. It was eight-thirty, and I had a counseling session at eight. Now there were just weekly instead of twice a week, but still I was late.

"I'll talk to you later!" I called to David as I rushed to the fire. I looked back and noticed that he looked thoroughly confused. Hey, who could blame him? His girlfriend just rushed off for no apparent reason. I laughed. "Counseling room!" I shouted into the fire, and I was in Lavender's room. "Hello. I'm sorry I'm late." I said, and she just nodded. "What are we doing today?" I said, curious.

"Today you are going to talk about whatever you want. I have been doing a lot of talking. Now it's your turn. Now I hear that you have a boyfriend." Lavender said, and I giggled. "Please don't tell my parents. His name is David Malfoy, and he's amazingly cute…" I said, and Lavender laughed. I went and talked for an hour, telling her every little detail of David, and what we had done so far. As I was leaving, she handed me a piece of paper.

"The invitation to my daughter's wedding. You may bring David if you wish. It's a very small ceremony next weekend. Please wear your dress robes, and tell David to do the same." She said, and I nodded. "See you next week. I wont forget next time." I said, and I flooed back to the common room, where David was waiting for me.

"Where did you leave to?" he said, curious. "I have counseling for…you know." I muttered. He looked surprised, then angry.

"If I ever get a hold of that scum who did that to you, I'm going to tear him limb from limb." David said, and I stared at him. He looked rather scary when he was angry. "It's okay." I said, hugging him. He looked down at me. He hugged me back. He kissed the top of my head, and Alex came in. He took one look at me and David and walked right out again. I sighed. Alex was being too babyish, and it was my fault. David didn't seem to care, because he tilted my chin up and kissed me.

_A/N: I really hope that you like this chapter. I like it a lot, because David and Lily get together! I know, I know, your thinking, "It's her decision that they get together." But still, I love the way it all turned out. PLEASE REVIEW! It would mean so much to me, it really would. The next chapter should be up on Tuesday or Wednesday. If it's not, I'm sorry, but I can't help it._


	12. Alex

_A/N: Thank you to my reviewers, I appreciate it. Here's the next chapter._

Disclaimer: "I'd like to thank my fans, who supported me even though I am not J.K. Rowling and do not own Harry Potter.

_Dedication: To Shannon, Bobbi and Lyndon: Thanks for being great friends_

When classes started up the following Monday, I did not like it. For one, that meant that I didn't get much time to spend with David. Sure, we sat at the same table while we did homework, but that isn't the same thing as talking.

Another thing: Homework. The teachers seemed to decide to give us twice as much homework as they had done previously, so on Tuesday evening I was hunched over my Transfiguration essay. I had been working on it for almost two hours and I still wasn't done. It was almost midnight and I still had to master a spell for charms to. I yawned and put down my quill. I hated homework. Especially since I didn't have David working next to me. Finally I gave up and went to bed.

The next morning, during History of Magic, all I did was daydream about David, and when I would be seeing him next. Tess was passing notes with Tucker, so she didn't notice me daydreaming. For once, I was glad. When class was over, I hurried to lunch to see him. Except he wasn't there. I ate my lunch quickly and went to look for him. I found him in the common room. With Alex.

I heard them yelling at each other before I even got to the portrait hole. I went in and found the two of them in a rather nasty fight. There was quite a few swear words, and from what I could see, they were fighting until death. I knew that they were fighting because of me, and I was feeling guilty. I sat there and watched them for a few minutes, not knowing what to do.

It was David who finally noticed I was standing there. He had won the fight, though by very little. He leaned over to kiss me, but I backed away. For one thing, David's nose was bleeding, he had two black eyes, and there was quite a bruise in his cheek. Also, I couldn't believe that he had fought like that with Alex. When we were little and girls used to tease me about stuff, David would have to hold me back from going to beat the crap out of them. "Fighting is never the answer." He would tell me. Now here he was, being the world's biggest hypocrite.

He seemed to realize what I was thinking. He used some spell to make his face clean, and he healed his nose. Then he said, "I know that I always told you that fighting is never the answer, but he was calling you these horrible names, and I had to teach him not to mess around with my girl." He told me, but I was still hesitant. He could tell.

He stepped forward, and whispered in my ear, "I love you Lily. I always have. If I were to give up my no-fighting rule for you, I think that's a good thing." I thought about what he said. The only part that I had heard was "I love you." I didn't say anything back, so he leaned over and kissed me. It was a very long kiss, longer then any of the ones we had been sharing lately. I ran my hands through his hair. It was soft.

We stopped kissing for a second to go sit on the couch, were we continued to kiss for quite a long time. Make-out is actually a better word for it. It was two when I finally realized that we should be in lessons. I pointed this out to David, and he smiled at me. "It'll be okay if we miss one lesson, don't worry." He whispered to me, and he sorta laid down on the couch. I lay down sorta on top of him, sorta to the side. I put my head on his chest and listened to his heart. I was so tired…

"Where were you?"

I blinked my eyes open. I looked around and I realized were I was. I was laying with David on a couch in the common room. I looked up and saw David was asleep. I realized that I must have fallen asleep on him after we were done making out. I got off of him, careful not wake him, and followed Tess, who had woken me up, out of the common room.

We went to the library, where Tess drilled me on what happened. Then she told me that she had seen Alex storming out of the common room. "What happened? I noticed that David's face was kind of bruised up to." She said, and I told her about the fight. She squealed.

"That's so cute! He wanted to protect you." She informed me, and I laughed. She told me that we had no homework for the class I missed, so I went and looked for a book that I needed for some of my homework. After borrowing a quill and some paper from Tess, I began my homework.

We worked for about an hour, and then we went to Dinner. We were leaving the dining hall when Alex came in, looking rather angry. I went over to talk to him; I wanted to set things straight. "Alex-" I began, but he cut me off.

"No need to explain, Lily. I see how it is. You never liked me in the first place; you only got with me to make David Jealous. I loved you, even though we were together for such a short time. Now go fuck your boyfriend, you little slut." He said to me in a very angry tone.

I was stung. I can't believe that he would call me that, if he loved me. I could feel tears roll down my cheek. Him calling me that seemed to bring back every horrible thought about the rape. In the beginning, I had thought that to. I thought I was dirty, I was a slut. Now apparently he thought that to.

I ran all the way up to my dorm crying. A lot of people looked at me on the way up, but I didn't care. I think I ran past David, but I'm not sure; my eyes were blurred from the tears. I ran and through myself onto my bed, still crying. No one came up to see me, but I knew that Tess would be up soon.

I tried to stop crying and think about why what Alex had said and why it bothered me so much. I tried to tell myself that he is just some lame boy with nothing better to do, but I couldn't shake the thought out of my mind. Now, David's face flashed through my mind. I was positive that he thought that I was a slut to.

Tess came up around half an hour later. "Why were you so upset about what Alex said to you?" She asked me, and I told her I didn't know. She nodded, then told me, "He looked rather guilty once you ran off. Oh, and David is like super worried about you. He is afraid that you are going to break up with him or something. Tucker is trying to tell him that everything is all right."

A fresh wave of tears overcame me when she said David's name. It was rather painful to think about him. His face kept popping into my mind; I couldn't push it out. Tess saw that I was crying again, and she hugged me. "It's okay, Lil. It really is." She whispered, but I kept on crying.

I avoided David all week. He noticed, and I think that he was really hurt by it. He kept coming up to talk to me, but I made some excuse to get away. But on Saturday, I could no longer ignore him. We had a Quiditch match against Ravenclaw. I wanted to beat them more then anything.

That morning in the locker rooms, David tried to talk to me, but I just waved him off. He looked so disappointed, and I couldn't blame him. He had tried to talk to me all week, but I wouldn't let him. When we walked out onto the field, he had a determined look on his face. He wanted to win, badly.

The game started out fairly well. We pulled ahead by five goals. Then, after half an hour, the other team pulled ahead by three goals. As fair as I could see, our chasers were getting tired. The ball was being passed back and forth a lot, and Slytherin didn't appear to be getting tired at all. When they pulled ahead by two more goals, I knew that I had to catch the snitch soon.

I looked even harder for the snitch, and after a few minutes I spotted it. I zoomed as fast I could after it, but the Slytherin keeper was closer. His broom wasn't as fast as mind, but I went as fast as I could toward him; I was gaining on him steadily. I reached out, we were even, I went ahead by the slightest bit, but I got there first. I grabbed the snitch; we won.

I flew to the ground, feeling very euphoric. I was grinning as my teammates grinned around me. The rest of the school was spilling onto the field. Alex walked up to me, and said something very quietly in my ear: "Slut." I wasn't grinning anymore. I was doing the opposite. I was crying now. I turned around and ran to the lockers.

As I was running, I heard David calling from behind me, "Lils! Wait!" But I didn't wait. I kept running until I got to the locker rooms. I sat on the bench and panted, I had run pretty far. I wasn't crying anymore, but I was still close to it. My hormones seemed to be extremely out of whack lately.

A second later David burst into the locker room. He spotted me, then rushed over to me. I opened my mouth to say I had to go, but David beat me. "No, you don't have anywhere to go. I want to know why you have been ignoring me, Lils. Please tell me." He said, a note of pleading in his voice. He never pleads with anyone.

I looked into his eyes, and I saw hurt, anger and fear. Next thing I knew I was pouring everything about Alex to David. I was crying again, but this time it was on David's shoulder. He looked very shocked, and rather angry. He hugged me so tight that I knew I was safe. When I was done crying, he pulled away from me and looked at me.

"You know, today, and earlier this week, when I saw you crying… I felt…horrible. If the world isn't right for you, it isn't right for me either. You shouldn't let him bother you. I love you, and that's all that matters. I was so scared that you were going to break up with me, Lils. Please don't do that to me again." He whispered in my ear. Lils. He had never called me that before. I liked it.

I hugged him again, and this time I looked up and kissed him. He was surprised, but he kissed me back. As we were kissing, the rest of the team filed in to change. We broke off, embarrassed. I blushed, and hurried to change out of my Quiditch robes. I could feel Sirius and James staring at me, but I ignored them. Everything was right between David and me again.

That night, when I went up to my dorm, I saw Kelsey laying on her bed. I hadn't talked to her much lately. She had one hand on her swollen abdomen, and she was staring at the ceiling. "I found out if the baby is a boy or a girl." She informed me, still staring at the ceiling. I looked at her, waiting for her to say.

A/N: _Muhahaha! Cliffhangers! Yes, yes, I know you hate them, but I like them. This isn't the best cliffhanger ever, but still, it's a cliffhanger nevertheless. PLEASE REVIEW! You have no idea how much it would mean to me. Thanks to my reviewer for the last chapter, you made my day better. _


	13. Tyler and Marissa

A/N: Yes, once again, I say thank you to my reviewers. I appreciate it so very much. The updates might be coming a little more spread out, because I'm starting school tomorrow.

_Disclaimer: NO! Don't sue me! I swear I don't own Harry Potter!_

_Dedication: To David, Angel, Jessica, Justin, Bernard and everyone else. I love you guys!_

I waited cautiously to for her to say. She looked rather sad, so it wasn't hard to guess what it was. Finally, she opened her mouth. "It's a boy." She said in a rather hollow voice. I couldn't help feeling bad for her; she looked so sad. I could tell she wanted to be alone, so I left her alone. I went downstairs to do more of my never-ending pile of homework.

Monday morning, the teachers sprang yet another project on us. This one was okay. "Okay class, I have a project for you. You will be pairing with a sixth-year Ravenclaw student. This will help you learn new things and them refresh their memories. Ah, and here they are." Professor McGonnagall told the class. I waited with the rest of the class, trying to suppress a groan.

Professor McGonnagall called of partners. I tuned out until I heard, "Potter, Lily and Marriott, Tyler." I looked over at my partner. As loyal as I am to David, I couldn't help but admit that he was pretty cute. He had black hair that sort of hung in his face, and ice blue eyes. I gave him a small smile, and he smiled back. We went to a desk, and began to work.

When we left, I found out more about the project. Apparently the teachers were doing some experimenting. So we would attend Potions, Transfiguration, Charms, DADA, and Herbology. We would alternate schedules. This week, we were on our own schedule, next week we were on the Ravenclaws schedules.

At the end of the day, when Tess and I were, trudging back up to class, we told each other all about our partners. Tess's was a girl named McKenna, and I guess she was really cool. I could tell Tess liked her a lot. I told her about Tyler. She grinned at me. We got to the common room, and I once again got out my homework.

When dinnertime came, David came up to get me for Dinner. I grinned at him.

"What do you think of these new projects?" he asked me, and I shrugged.

"They're okay. My partner is Tyler Marriott. Yours?" I asked him.

David's face darkened slightly when I said Tyler's name, but he didn't say anything. "Nathan Woo." He said.

We made our way down to dinner. After we were done eating, there was Quiditch practice. I did a couple of hours of homework, and then I went to bed. It had been a long day.

The next two days were rather hectic. I couldn't wait to have class with Tyler. It felt so good to be around him, he was really funny. So when Thursday morning finally came, I was happy. David wasn't too happy though.

"You think he's cute?" David exclaimed, overhearing my conversation with Tess. We both looked at him.

"He's a-" he started to say, but he stopped himself with some effort. He shook his head, and just walked off without saying goodbye.

As Tess and I walked to Charms, I couldn't help feeling that David knew something about Tyler that he wasn't telling me…

School was flying by. My sessions with Lavender were only once a month now. Tyler and I got to be like really good friends. He was the first guy that I trusted after David. He just seemed so… everything. Just David didn't seem to like him at all. When we were studying in the library and Tyler came to join us, he would make some excuse to leave. It didn't matter; I liked Tyler a lot.

Before I knew it, it was Valentines Day. David and I had plans to spend the day together in Hogsmade. We were going to madam Puddifoots. As we walked out to Hogsmade, we chatted a bit. We got to Hogsmade and made our way towards Madam Puddifoots. We got coffees, and next thing I knew we were making out across the table.

That lasted quite a long time. Then we talked some more and walked through the shops. We stopped in the three broomsticks, where I spotted, Tyler.

"Hey Ty!" I said to him, and he came over to us and we chatted for a while. David stood there with a look of annoyance on his face, but he didn't say anything. When Tyler left, David and I sat down at a table.

"Is there anything between you and Tyler? I mean anything more then friends?" David asked me sharply, and I shook my head. I was surprised that David even thought that.

"I think there is. You guys are always hanging out. You like him don't you?" David said accusingly. I could feel hurt rising in my throat. How could he think that.

"David, there is nothing more then friends between me and Tyler." I told, him, to which he replied, "Bullshit."

This reply made the hurt come to a bursting point. "David, I promise-" I started to say, but he cut me off.

"There is something between Tyler, I know there is!" He shouted, and he got up and stalked out, leaving me in tears. I knew the whole bar was watching me, but I didn't care. I just sat there and cried for I don't know how long. Tyler came to sit next to me.

"I'm sorry about your fight with David." He said, sounding guilty. That's the way things are with Tyler. He thinks that everything is his fault.

"It's not your fault, David was being a jerk." I mumbled, still crying.

"C'mon, let's go. Let's go back to the castle." Tyler said, getting up. I followed him, and we left. I followed him, stumbling slightly, crying still. I was positive that David was going to tell me that it was over next time he saw me. Tyler was being really good, he kept making sure that I didn't walk into anything because my head was down.

Once we got back to the castle, he led me to the room of requirement. "I think that you might need some time in peace." He told me, giving me a friendly hug. I nodded, but I didn't want him to leave. It was so comforting to have Ty around. "Stay, please." I said, and he did.

After about an hour, I went up to the common room. Tess was there. I sat down next to her on the couch, aware that everyone was looking at me. "I heard about what happened between you and David." She told me quietly, and I nodded. Great; it was already around school.

"I know why David thought that you and Ty have something going on. Marissa told him so. Apparently she told him that the two of you hold hands or kiss or something." Tess told me, sounding sad for me.

I looked up at her. I couldn't believe that David believed her without even asking me first! He believed Marissa the slut over his own girlfriend! I knew that Marissa and Gabe had broken up and she liked David again, but I expected David to know that anything that came out of her mouth was bullshit. I got up to tell David what happened, but stopped. He was the one who was wrong, not me. I would wait for him to apologize.

I hoped that he would apologize that night, but I had no such luck. I decided that I would not accept his apology right away. He made me suffer, so it would be his turn. That is, if he ever does apologize.

It turned out I was going to have to wait more then I thought for him to apologize. He ignored me all Sunday, along with the rest of Saturday. I tried to pretend like I didn't care, but it was hard. Twice when I saw him, I started crying. I was very glad when classes started up again on Monday. I didn't have to be in the common room all the time then.

I couldn't wait to see Ty in Transfiguration. He was so understanding of the whole thing. He had quickly become my best guy friend. As he tried to teach me to transfigure a kitten, my mind was somewhere else. Finally, he looked at me seriously.

"I know that your fight with David is really on your mind right now, and I know that you could have hated me because the fight was my fault, but unless you want detention, I suggest you get working." He told me, trying to sound stern, but friendly at the same time.

I sighed; I knew he was right. Very grudgingly, I paid attention as Ty tried for the third time to explain the spell.

David ignored me all week, and I ignored him. I had never known David to be like this, never. The whole school had heard about it, and almost everyone had taken my side. Almost; I saw Marissa trying to pull David toward our dorm. He shook her off, but I couldn't help feeling as though my heart was broken… How could David do this to me?

On Thursday night, when I was coming to the dining hall, I noticed Marissa, Kelsey and Tess all in conversation. I jumped behind a statue near them, so I could hear what they were saying. Apparently Kelsey had made Marissa tell David what she did, and Tess was there to make sure she told the truth.

"So your telling me that there is nothing between Lily and Tyler?" David said, sounding horror-struck. I guess Marissa must have nodded, because I peeked around the corner. Tess and Kelsey both looked very angry with Marissa and David, and David looked absolutely horrified.

"I've got to fix things before it's to late! Tess, please don't tell her that Marissa managed to kiss me. I didn't kiss her back, I pushed her away, but Lily wouldn't like that at all." David said, starting to walk away.

The moment I heard David say Marissa kissed him, I started crying. I jumped out from behind the statue, and cried, "There's no need to tell Tess to keep quiet, I heard for myself. How could you David? How could you believe her and not even ask me? How could you _kiss_ her?" I asked, the tears streaming.

David just stood there, looking dumbstruck. "Lily- that's not what- I-" he sputtered. He tried to step forward and hug me, but I ran towards Kelsey and Tess, who stood on both sides of me, like bodyguards. He tried stepping forward to talk to me, but Tess snapped, "Don't you think you've done enough damage for one night? Just get lost."

He did, slowly. It was obvious he would be able to talk to me tonight. He turned slowly and walking in the other direction, with his head down. I backed against the nearest wall, slid down it, and started to cry even harder. Marissa had gone, but Tess and Kelsey came and sat next to me. I cried for a long time, and they just let me. Finally, after twenty minutes, Tess jumped up, and helped Kelsey up (Kelsey is five months along, so she is really rather big). I pulled myself up unhappily.

Tess pulled me towards the room of requirement, and Kelsey followed. We went in there, and it was awesome. It was stalked with chocolate and French-fries and everything that was good for a broken heart. There were some beanbag chairs, and numerous other things. I plopped myself in a beanbag chair, and grabbed some chocolate.

"How did Marissa kiss David?" I asked glumly, and Tess scowled. Kelsey didn't do anything, so I was guessing she hadn't seen.

"Well, it was right before dinner. I was in the common room, and David was sitting on the couch. Marissa came over and sat next to him, and they kind of started talking. I stopped working to watch. Marissa sort of leaned in, and then she kissed him on the lips. It lasted a few seconds, then he pushed her off and yelled 'I have a girlfriend!' then he got up and stalked out, and Kelsey dragged Marissa after him and I followed and, well, you saw the rest." She said, and I started crying again.

"He didn't even push her off right away! He let her carryon for awhile, then he remembered me." I said, shaking with sobs.

We stayed there pretty late, it was well after curfew when we were making our way back to our dorms. We didn't get caught. It took us awhile to be sneaky, but we finally arrived back at the common room. I went through the portrait hole first, and David was in the common room.

Tess had scrambled in soon after me, and she saw him to. I had stopped in my tracks. Then, I shot off like a rocket towards my dorm, listening to David shout, "Lily, wait! We need to talk!" I didn't care how much he wanted to talk at the moment. I just wanted to be away from him.

_A/N: Okay, once again, I ask for reviews. If you are an author of a story, you know how good it feels to receive a review. If your not an author, let me tell you, it feels really great to receive a review. SO REVIEW!_


	14. Pink Petals and Black Bludgers

A/N: At the time of writing this, I have received one review for the last chapter. Thank you so very much, it is greatly appreciated. I'll make you a deal. If I get seven reviews for this chapter, I'll update by Wednesday pr Thursday. If I get less then that, I will add two days for every review less. And if you think your review doesn't count, IT DOES!

_Disclaimer: Ha, as if. If I were rich, I would so be like skiing in aspen or something. I have no money since I don't own the Harry Potter Books._

_Dedication: Hmmm, to…every single person who knows what it feels like to be a girl. In short, all girls._

I didn't sleep at all that night. All I did was toss and turn back and forth. I finally fell asleep around five in the morning, so I only had a few hours of sleep. When I got up, I yawned widely and got dressed. Kelsey was in a bad mood since she couldn't get her cloak fastened over her stomach; when I left she was shrieking.

In the common room, David was nowhere to be seen. Matt, David's brother, was waiting for me though.

"Hey Lily, what did you and David fight about anyway? He wouldn't tell me, but all night he was tossing and turning. He finally fell asleep, and he is still in bed." Matt said, and I sighed. I told him the whole story. Shaking his head, he went back to his dorm to wake David up and I went to DADA with Tyler.

Tyler could tell that I was tired, but I didn't care. The first thing I did was put my head down, and next thing I knew, I was lying in white sheets. I looked around quizzically. Tess was standing with Tucker, holding something out for me.

"What happened?" I asked, and Tess rolled her eyes.

"You fell asleep, that's what! They levitated you to the hospital wing, and now Madam Pomfrey is convinced that you are suffering from some weird illness… Good luck with her. Oh ya, this is from David." She said, holding out the package again.

I took it and opened it. Inside was a photo album. As I looked through it, I could feel myself almost crying. There were pictures that I hadn't seen in forever, even some that I had never seen at all. They started out from when my Dad started Hogwarts, then my mum worked into them. They ran all the way through now.

Tess had left by the time I was done. Before I had a chance to read the inscription in the back, I heard the door. It was David.

I hastily set the album on my bed stand and pretended to still be asleep. David came over and sat next to me. I tried my best to look asleep.

He lifted my hand and held it. He started talking to me, still thinking that I was asleep and couldn't hear him.

"I'm so sorry Lils. I never, ever meant to hurt you like this… you had already been hurt by Flint then I go and break you heart… I'm sorry. I did not kiss Marissa, but she kissed me. I'm sure you heard from Tess that it lasted a second or two before I pushed her off, but I was surprised. I know you can't hear me, but I Love you more then anyone on this earth. I would never do anything to hurt you. I'm sorry, Baby, I'm sorry." He said, his voice breaking slightly.

I squeezed my eyes open a tiny bit to I could see his face. He was looked like he was going to cry, and I felt so bad for being mad, but I wasn't going to let my guard down. We were still fighting. He reached up and kissed my hand, then left. I pondered what he had said. He had called me Baby. He's never called me that before.

I picked up the album and read the inscription. Well, tried to is a better word for it. It was all these symbols that I didn't understand. I set the book back on the desk and waited for Madam Pomfrey to be done examining me.

I was out of the hospital wing at dinnertime and I was very glad. After I was done eating, I went and found Kelsey, Tess, Tucker and Tyler all at one table in the library. Tyler looked up when I came in, and his face brightened.

"All better then?" he said, smiling. I nodded. I went and sat next to him and Tess. Kelsey was looking through a book of baby names, and Tucker was reading a book very fast. Tess smiled at me, and gave a large pile of homework that I missed. Tyler added to the pile. I groaned and started to work on it.

David came into the library, accompanied by Matt. I looked up and did a double take. I hadn't seen them together for a long time. Oh, by the way, Sirius's band went out the window when I was raped. Anyway, they looked a lot alike. I hastily bent down over my work when they came my way.

Matt went and sat next to Kelsey, and they began going through the name book together. David stood behind me, his shadow on my book.

"Lily, please, can we talk?" He asked pleadingly.

I opened my mouth to say no, we're over, but then Tess nudged me a little bit. I looked at her. She gave me a tiny nod, so I decided to chance talking to him.

"All right" I replied grudgingly.

So we walked. He led me to some deserted corridor.

"Listen, Lils. I love you so much and I'm sorry I did all this to you. I never meant for this to happen." He said, sounding sad.

"Y-You believed Marissa over me! How could you do that?" I said, my voice cracking as I choked back a sob. A few tears spilled over. David stepped forward to comfort me, but I backed away.

"Lily, I'm sorry! Okay, that's all I can say. I'm sorry." He said, softly.

I looked up at him, his face so full of pleading ness for me to forgive him. I wanted to so much to forgive him, but now, looking into his eyes for the first time in about a week, I knew it wouldn't be that easy for him.

I looked at my hands, and he seemed to understand what I was thinking.

"What can I do to get you to forgive me?" he said softly again. I looked up at him, trying to decide what to say.

"You do something you think that I would like." I told him finally.

All weekend, David tried to do things to get me to forgive me. He sent me flowers, he sent me notes, he went and got the books I needed without me even saying I needed them. None of it was good though. It was all something that a normal boyfriend might do on a lot. I wanted something different. On Monday morning, I got something different.

When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was that there were flower petals all around my bed. There was some stiffer ones mixed in, and I picked it up. In swirly writing, it said, _I love Lily Potter. Love, David Malfoy._ I laughed. I swung my feet out into what I thought was a petal free environment.

Well, it wasn't. It was covered in petals. There were red ones and white ones and pink ones, and some orange and yellow mixed in here and there. It was awesome. I thought that was all, but I was wrong again. The common room was full of them. I watched people picking them up and reading them, laughing, and setting them back down.

I walked over to the portrait hole, grinning. David was waiting there for me.

"See this? It's all for you. It took me all night, but it was worth seeing you so happy, even if you don't forgive me." He said, smiling like he thought this wouldn't be enough.

It was. Seeing him smile, even if it was a sad smile, and hearing him say those words made my heart melt. I hugged him hard. He stepped back slightly in surprise, but he hugged me to. He ran his hand through my hair, hugging me as hard as he could back. This was wonderful.

We walked down to breakfast together and had a nice little chat about trusting each other. He had his arm around me, and he even jinxed Alex when Alex called me a slut. I was so wrapped up in David I didn't even notice Marissa scowling at us.

In transfiguration, I did really well. I could concentrate again, but only in the beginning. Tess could tell that I was really happy, and so could everyone else. I had been sulking all week and now I was all happy. Tyler actually told me to concentrate so I could do my work, this time because I was so happy, not sad.

I just grinned at him and hugged him. His cheeks went slightly red, but all he said was, "Don't let David see you doing that."

I laughed. "Me and David had a little talk about trusting each other, so it's okay. Besides, I'm free to hug whoever I want." I told him, smiling. I was in to good of a mood to let anything bother me.

My mood lasted until after dinner, when I had to tackle the mountain of homework that I had let fall behind. Plus the weekend coming up was the third Quiditch match. I had practices three nights that week, so it was hard doing all the homework. I would be glad when the game was over and I could get back to a normal routine of a practice a week.

On Saturday morning, it dawned bright and cold. The whole team walked down to the pitch together. James was gabbing about our chances to win the cup, but I wasn't listening. I knew it was my job to grab the snitch and that was all. Well, get it fast, but still.

As we flew up, I searched around for it; I saw it nowhere. The other seeker was looking to. I didn't even hear the commentary going on around me. All I knew was that suddenly, there the snitch was. I zoomed after it, faster and faster, until, YES! I caught it. A split second later, it all went black.

"Isn't this her fourth or fifth hospital wing visit this year?"

"That bludger was hit after the final whistle, the beater should be expelled.

"Madam Pomfrey says there might be some damage, I guess we will see."

I heard all these words. I opened my eyes and squinted around. My head hurt a LOT, and there were a lot of people I didn't know standing around. A woman with red hair noticed I was awake.

"Hey honey, how you feeling?" she said softly, stroking my hair. I was rather taken aback by this. A woman who I didn't even know was stroking my hair. A man with black hair came over to.

"Hey kiddo, what's up?" he said, sitting on the end of my bed. I looked around. There was a girl with long black hair, and boy with black hair, a boy with dark brown hair, a girl with long blonde hair, and another boy with light brown hair. I didn't know any of them, but they all seemed to know me.

A woman in a nursing uniform came bustling up. Seeing that I was awake, she came bustling over.

"Tut, Tut. A bludger straight at your head, it's a wonder you didn't get more injured then you did. You're a lucky one, you are." She muttered darkly. She handed me a cup of potion, which I guess I was supposed to drink. I did; it was gross.

The room came into slightly sharper view. A few things cleared in my head. That woman with red hair… she was my mum! And that man with black hair was my dad. I looked at everyone else. The girl with long black hair looked really familiar, as did the girl with blonde hair. The boys didn't look familiar at all. I looked over at the one with light brown hair. He grinned.

I looked around at everyone around me one more time. I had no idea who the boys were. I couldn't remember anything about them. In fact, I could barely remember anything at all!

_A/N: Oh No! Poor Lily has lost her memory… oh well, lets see what happens. Oh yes, and about the Alex character. He only acts the way he does because he is so jealous. And remember, your review does count. SEVEN REVIEWS! I don't even care if they are all from the same person, I would just like seven of them. _


	15. Whats your name again?

_A/N: Okay, thank you guys so much, I love you all! Cookies to all of you! At least everyone who reviewed. You guys made me so happy…Thanks for reviewing._

_Disclaimer: I wish…Nah, don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To my volleyball team! And to Stuf, who gave me a whole lot of reviews. _

I looked around at all of them one more time. I could only remember that the red haired woman and black haired man were my parents. I couldn't remember anything else about them, such as there names. The nurse seemed to notice something was wrong; she ushered the people out, saying that they could come back later.

"Now, Lily, you seem to have lost your memory." The nurse said. For a second I wondered who Lily was. Then I remember; it was me!

The nurse introduced herself as madam Pomfrey. I nodded. She told me that I had been hit by a bludger in the Quiditch game, and I must have lost my memory. I strained my memory, or what was left of it. I remembered most things to do with magic, and some parts of Quiditch, but no memories with people in them.

"Will I get my memory back?" I asked quietly, afraid to hear the answer. This was really hard, I would have to relearn a lot of stuff. I looked at Madam Pomfrey; she was thinking.

"In time, yes. You may wake up tomorrow morning and have remembered everything. But don't count on that. I imagine that by the end of the school year you will have your memory back." She said.

I blushed slightly. "What month is it right now?" I asked, embarrassed. Madam Pomfrey smiled gently.

"It's the beginning of March. School ends in June." She said. I sighed. I remembered the months, and that would mean three months like this. I looked at my hands.

"Who were all those people out there?" I asked, even though I figured they were my friends.

"Here, I will call them back in. You may remember some of them, since the longer you have known them, the more memory you have of them." She told me, and she went to get them.

They all came back in, this time with a few others. The woman who I believe is my mum introduced them all. "This is Tess, Kelsey, David, Tucker, Tyler, Sirius and Molly." She said pointing at all of them in turn. I nodded, trying to remember them all. Then she pointed at herself and then my dad, and told me their names.

"Sorry, sweetie, for leaving so soon, but I have to get home. I will see you later." She said, kissing my forehead. My dad did the same, and they left. I looked carefully at each person. The boy named Sirius and the girl named Molly came over to me. The boy said, "I'm your brother, and this is your sister." I looked at the two of them, straining my memory. Then it came back; I remember a memory.

Flashback

I was sitting on the floor in pajamas, with Sirius next to me. "Molly, come on Molly!" I said, trying to coax my baby sister to walk. A little boy was next to her, trying to help her. A big boy came in, and held Molly's hand to. Carefully, all four of us helped Molly take her first steps.

End Flashback

My face lit up. I remembered my family! That was the only memory I had of my brothers and sisters. I knew that two of them were missing. I couldn't remember what they looked like, or their names, but I knew I had two more brothers. I grinned at them. They hugged me.

"Remus and James are coming later." Sirius said. Those were my other siblings!

Next, the girl with Blonde hair and a very large tummy came forward. By the looks of it, she was very pregnant. I looked at her. She smiled, and another memory flashed into my mind.

Flashback

I pulled Kelsey by the hand into the woods. She didn't want to go. I continued pulling her until she gave up. "Come on!" I whispered, fearless. Kelsey whimpered slightly. We ventured on, until we found what I was looking for: the stream. Kelsey leaned over the water and I pushed her in. At first, she looked angry, then I jumped in behind her.

End Flashback

"Kelsey?" I said, wondering if I was right. The only memories that I seemed to have were ones from when I was really little. The girl nodded, and she gave me a hug, though it was rather difficult. The boys named Tyler and Tucker didn't bother come forward. I studied them for a second. A flash of a boy hugging a crying girl in a classroom, apologizing for something popped into my mind. That must have been Tucker.

I looked at the other boy. Another flash of a memory; him telling me to concentrate because I wasn't doing something right.

I smiled at the two of them. Now that I had flashes of memory for people, I could remember their names. I turned to the black haired girl. Straining my memory, a memory popped into it.

Flashback

"Leave her alone!" I shouted at some big boys yelling at a small girl with long black hair. They scampered off, laughing. "Are you okay?" I asked the girl. She nodded. She stood up, and followed me to my compartment on the train, which I was sharing with Kelsey, and Sirius. "I'm Lily." I said. "I'm Tess." She said.

End Flashback

I smiled at Tess, then turned my attention to the last boy. He had light brown hair and hazel eyes; he was cute. I could not remember anything about him though. Nothing. I strained my memory to try and think of something, but nothing came up. The boy could tell. He looked heart-broken.

"I'm David." He said softly, looking sad. The name didn't ring a bell. He turned and left slowly, apparently not wanting to stay here any longer.

The others left soon after. The girl Tess had left me an album with photos in it to see if I recognized anything. I knew who all those people were, but I didn't _know _them. It was like they were people I met somewhere, like I said hello to on a train. They were all nice, but I felt really alone.

I looked through the photo album. Most of them were of here at Hogwarts. On one of the last pages, which I guess has more recent pictures, there was a picture of what I am guessing is me. That boy with light brown hair is hugging me from behind and kissing my cheek. There wasn't the slightest bit of familiar ness on his face; yet here he was, waving up at me from a picture.

I stared at that picture for a long time. It was hard to comprehend that this was me! It wasn't some girl pretending to be me, it was me. By that time, my head was hurting from straining my memory, so I slumped back against my pillows, intending to close my eyes and think. I fell asleep almost at once.

I stayed at the hospital wing for another day. I was getting back flashes of memories. They meant nothing since they were so fast, but Madam Pomfrey said it was a very good sign. I went back to classes on Tuesday morning. It was weird.

The girl Tess had to help me find my way to every class; it was rather embarrassing. Some of the classes I had with that boy Tyler, whom I liked very much. I like Tess to, and Tucker and Kelsey. That boy with light brown hair wasn't around very often. Every time he looked at me, he seemed so sad. I wasn't sure how long ago that picture was taken, but I was guessing not to long ago.

Tuesday night, after dinner, I was sitting at a table with Tyler, Tess, Kelsey and Tucker doing my homework. It was hard, since I didn't remember a lot of the stuff. The teachers had given me a little break, but I still had a lot of homework to do. When I was finally done with homework from one subject, I grinned and threw down my quill.

Tess looked up at me. I grinned at her. She smiled back a bit, and then she said, "Do you remember David at all?"

I stared at her blankly. Who was David? Interpreting my blank stare correctly, she said, "That boy with the light brown hair who tends to look at you a lot?" She said, and I nodded, remembering that boy from the picture. Then I shook my head, answering her question.

She sighed. "He talked to me the other night, you know? He's really scared that you're going to get with someone else because you can't remember liking him." She told me, looking over at David.

I looked at my hands. I hadn't been thinking about him much. So he was my boyfriend in what my life used to be. I didn't remember any of it.

The next day, after lessons, I had to go and visit Madam Pomfrey. She did some tests on me, prodded me a lot, and felt my forehead at least a dozen times. When she was finally finished, she looked at me.

"Well?" I said, raising my eyebrows. The last prod from the wand hurt, so I wasn't in a terribly good mood. She raised her eyebrows back at me. I knew that if I was cheeky again I would pay.

"You have regained some memory, which tells me that you will soon have most of your memory back. However, you seemed to have put up a mental block around all things that have to do with pain, such as the rape, and any relationships you had with anyone." She told me, not meeting my eyes.

I looked at my hands. Tess had told me about the rape also. I couldn't believe that had happened to me. I couldn't remember anything to do with romance, and that was one of the things.

I got up and left, and intended to go to dinner. I walked and I ran into the boy with light brown hair. He talked to me, and I talked back. I couldn't help feeling kind of uncomfortable. I mean, I hardly know this boy, and he's chatting with me like we've known each other for ages!

Finally, once we were at the entrance hall, I couldn't put it off any longer. I couldn't remember the boy's name. "Sorry, what was your name again?" I asked, looking up at him. He looked crestfallen, almost like he was going to cry.

"David, my name is David." He said, looking down at his hands. He turned around and walked away.

"Hey, I think we should just be friends for now. Until I start remembering stuff… Well, Ya." I said to his retreating back.

He stopped dead. "If that is what you want." He said, and then he turned around and fled in the other direction.

I shrugged and went into the dining hall. I felt bad about what had just happened, but there was nothing that I could do. I looked around, and there was no were to sit. I finally spotted a seat next to a boy with dark brown hair with flecks of blonde here and there. He was turned away from me.

I sat there and ate for a while then the boy turned around. He looked surprised to see me sitting there.

"Hi Lily." He said, smiling at me. I smiled back at him. I wasn't going to cause another seen by asking his name. He started talking to me, and I talked back. He seemed really nice and friendly, I liked him a lot. He started flirting a little bit, and I flirted to. He was super cute, at least from my opinion.

When we were done eating, we walked back to the Gryffendor tour. He kissed my cheek when we got inside. As I was going to my dorm, I realized that I still didn't know his name.

"What's you name again?" I called down to him from the top of the stairs.

He grinned at me. "My name is Alex." He said.

_A/N: OOOOO what is going to happen? Who knows. Please leave me a review! I can't make a deal with you guys this time. I don't have a working computer right now, I'm doing this at the library. I will try and get the next chapter to you as soon as I can. Here is something that might make you laugh: I flushed my cell phone down the toilet on accident. Yes, go ahead and laugh. Hahahaha. Now leave me a review now that you have laughed._


	16. That David Kid

A/N: Thank you guys so much for the reviews for the last chapter. My Internet is working again, thank god. The updates should come maybe once a week, maybe a little longer. I'll try my best.

_Disclaimer. I don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To the victims of Hurricane Katrina._

I scampered happily up to my dorm. Alex was really cute! And he liked me! I would have thought that I would have remembered someone that cute. Tess was up there, and she was looking at me seriously.

"What's up?" I said, grinning at her. She stared back at me.

"Why were you talking to Alex?" she asked me, frowning.

I shrugged. "I sat next to him and we started talking and, well, ya. He is so cute, don't you think? He likes me a lot! He kissed my cheek on the way up." I told her.

Her eyes bugged out of her head, practically. "Are you serious? What about David? You're just going to cheat on him? Do you know what Alex did to you before you lost your memory?" Tess exclaimed, looking angry.

I sighed. "Yes, I am serious. I broke up with David, so I'm not cheating on him. What did Alex do to me before?" I told her.

She sighed. Now she looked more annoyed at me, rather then angry. "That must have been why David was looking so sad. Alex called you all of these not so nice names. He called you a-a slut and all these names." She told me, looking at me like she just realized I didn't know.

I thought about it. Alex would never do that. "He would have never done that to me. He likes me and I like him, and your just trying to protect that David kid. I don't believe you." I told Tess, and she looked angry again.

"Fine. When you get your memory back, you will have no boyfriend at all then." She snapped, and stalked into the bathroom. I liked Tess a lot, and I didn't want her to be mad at me, but hey, she was lying to me. I went to me bed and wrenched the curtains closed. I was going to bed.

The next morning, I woke up. I had been having dreams of what I'm guessing is some of my memories. It was really weird. When I looked at people now, people that I know, I had memories to connect them with.

That day at lunch, I sat with Alex. I held hands with him. He was really funny and sweet. I caught a glimpse of that David kid. He was looking in our direction and looking super sad. If you ask me, he had some strange obsession with me.

After lessons, I had to go to Madam Pomfrey again. She did the same thing she did yesterday, this time she looked incredibly pleased.

"You have regained a lot of your memory. You should have all of your memory, except for the romance section, back by, if my predictions are correct, Sunday." She told me, looking pleased.

I grinned. That meant that I wouldn't have to keep being the worst one in class anymore. "When am I going to get my other memories back?" I asked her, curious.

"I'm not sure." She said, looking thoughtful. I understood that I could leave, so I did. I went up to my dorm to put my bag down. Tess was there.

"I saw you at lunch with Alex." She said softly. I nodded.

"Your really breaking David's heart, you know." She said. I looked at her.

"Why do you care so much about that David kid?" I said. I hadn't thought of him at all.

"Because 'that David kid' loves you! He talks to me lately, he tells me stuff! He can't sleep at night, knowing you like someone else. He is falling behind in his classes; you are all he can think about! Your hurting him so bad." Tess practically shouted at me.

I stared back at her coldly. Why did it matter so much to her who I liked? I remember enough to know that we are best friends, but not much more.

"I don't believe you. Your lying." I announced to her, and stalked out to go find Alex.

Tess and I didn't talk all weekend. Madam Pomfrey was right; I did remember everything except romance. This made it even worse to mad at Tess. Kelsey was always too tired to do stuff, since her stomach was so big. I really had no one to talk to. My cousins and my friend Kimmy were always there, but they weren't as good.

Alex and I were now onto kissing. It felt so awesome to kiss him. He was really sweet and funny to. I just loved being around him. That David kid was always looking sad though. I tried to push him out of my mind, but I had an inkling that the something that was wrong with him was my fault.

Monday morning rolled around, and Tess and I still weren't talking. I tried not to let this bother me, but it was hard. I had so much on my mind that it was hard to concentrate on my lessons. I was glad that I had Tyler, who hadn't said anything about David or Alex. I was glad at least one of my friends wasn't opinionated.

Lunch was okay. Alex pulled me into a deserted corridor, and we began kissing. Well, making out. It was cool and all, but then David came along. I couldn't help but noticing that he looked horrible. When I first saw him, he was good looking. Now, he looked horrible. His eyes had shadows under them, and his hair was a mess. He looked tired, and he was walking with his head down.

Then he looked up and saw us making out. I realized with a jolt in my stomach that Tess had probably been telling the truth all along. David looked at us in horror and run out of the corridor. I sighed. I looked up at Alex's adorable face.

"Listen Alex. It's not that I don't like you, but once I get my memory back, I probably won't want to be with you anymore. I'm sorry, but I think we should just be friends." I told him grudgingly.

Alex studied me for a second, and then nodded. "Okay. I think that sounds good." He told me. He gave me a hug, and then walked off in the other direction, leaving me wondering if I made the right choice.

I walked up to the dorms. I was think about what I did. I didn't even notice that there was a suit of armor coming up. BAM! I walked straight into it, banging my head. Memories began to flash before my eyes. Ones with David, ones with Alex, ones with Marcus Flint.

When I opened my eyes, I was lying on the floor. What had happened came flooding back to me. Everything that had happened with Alex… How could I have liked that scumbag? And David, poor David, what was I going to do about him?

I jumped up and dashed to Gryffendor tower. I had a splitting headache, but I didn't care. I had to find David and Tess and apologize. I found Tess first. She was sitting in the common room and doing her homework. I ran up to her.

"Tess, I am so sorry! I didn't mean to call you a liar, and I know that you were telling the truth, I'm so sorry Tess!" I said really fast, all in one breath. Tess looked up at me, amazed. Then she smiled.

"Got your memory back, now have you? Yes, I accept you apology. Now what are you going to go about David?" She said.

"I don't know!" I wailed. Then, speak of the devil, David walked in. I jumped up and ran to him.

"I'm so sorry David, I didn't mean any of that! You're the one that I want, not Alex. Can you please forgive me? I love you." I told him urgently.

He shook his head. "I'm sorry Lily. I just can't be with you. You hurt me to bad by being with Alex. I think you and I are better off as being not together. So long Lily." He told me softly. There was something in his face that looked different now.

I watched him walk away. I started crying. Tess was right. Now I had no one to be with. Tess saw me crying and jumped up to hug me. I just continued right on sobbing, right there in the middle of the common room. I had screwed up my life and I knew, just because of a cute boy who was nice to me.

The next day, the last thing I wanted to do was get up and go to lessons. I knew I had to though, so I dragged myself up. Now I see how David felt when was with Alex. I had hardly slept. I didn't do anything to my hair, just pulled it into a ponytail. I stooped down and grabbed my books.

I made my way slowly down to the dining hall. I wasn't hungry at all, but Tess was, so I went down with her. I had never been this depressed. I didn't want to do anything. I remembered the stuff that Alex did to me, and he was actually civil to me. It seemed to me like he actually wanted to be friends.

The worst part of all day was seeing David. He looked better then he had lately. His hair wasn't all messy, and the bags were gone. He looked slightly frazzled, and Tess told me that was because he suddenly decided that he couldn't afford to keep screwing up in classes.

Speaking of classes, I was doing everything I could to keep up with them. They were becoming increasingly harder. I did everything I could to do well in classes that Friday, and still, I only ended up with something that was barely passing. Tyler could tell that the whole David situation was affecting my work.

At the end of the day, I went down and had some dinner. I was a little hungry, but I guessed that was because I hadn't eaten all day. I did want to do anything, but I knew that I had homework to do. I pulled out my books and started working. It was incredibly lonesome to do without David or Alex or anyone sitting next to me.

I worked almost all night on my homework, and I managed to get it all done. It was amazing, but I did it. I was so tired that I toppled into bed with my clothes on as the sun was rising. I didn't sleep though. I tried, and I fell asleep after awhile. But I laid there for hours before I finally fell asleep.

I got up around four and trudged down to the common room. My hair was a mess, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything, except school. And David. But David didn't matter, since I don't matter to him. I was so depressed; it was hard to believe that just a few days before I was so happy.

I sat there on a couch doing nothing. David came down the stairs for the boy's dormitory, and I could feel my heart flip over. I could feel myself start to cry. It hurt so much to look at him. Not having him hurt more then the whole episode with the rape. It was amazing, but it was true. A broken heart hurts.

_A/N: This is a short chapter, but sorry. Okay, I have a question for you guys. Did you like the deal I made with you about the reviews? If you want me to do that more often, tell me and I will. _


	17. Falling Down

_A/N: Okay, thank you so much for the reviews, I appreciate them so much. This chapter isn't terribly interesting interesting until the end, and I'm sorry for that. I needed filler space, and this was it. The next chapter will be more interesting. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter_

_Dedication: To…a person who made my day go from bad to good without even knowing._

I went to bed late on Saturday night, and I didn't get up until very late on Sunday afternoon. I had trouble sleeping again. I had only gotten maybe six hours of sleep in the last to nights. I felt like a zombie walking around.

Monday morning, I went from being really unhappy to being down right depressed. Marissa was following David around like a puppy, and he seemed to be liking it. Every time I saw David, I started crying. I couldn't help it. I screwed my life up so bad. David never glanced in my direction when people where watching him. Every once in a while though, I would catch him staring at me.

The rest of March went by in a blur. I could feel myself falling deeper and deeper into a fit of depression. David was accompanied by some new girl hanging on his arm. Everybody I knew said they were just friends, but every time I saw them it broke my heart. Everything I was involved in was slipping.

My classes were disasters. Well, written parts of things were okay, but it was things like mastering spells and brewing potions that I kept screwing up on. Professor McGonnagall actually held me back one class to see if anything was wrong. I, of course, told her no. I wasn't going to discuss my personal life with a teacher.

My performance on the Quiditch team was suffering to. I could hardly do anything, and James warned me that if I didn't pick things up, he would have to let the reserve seeker play. This made me cry, but that is nothing new. It seems that all I am doing these days is crying.

My hair was back to its natural color to. It was like that when I woke up one morning, and I couldn't put enough heart into a spell to change it back. Also, I was getting thinner and thinner. More like my bones were jutting out more and more. I wasn't anorexic or anything, but the desire to eat was gone…

I couldn't believe that David was having this much of an effect on me. I had never been not friends with David, as we were now. Even before we were together, we were friends; he was always there for me to turn to. Then we got together, and I relied on him even more. We were together for two months, and those were the best to months of my life.

Then I screwed up. Big time. Now I'm stuck being depressed, with no one to turn to. Not even Tess understands. No one does. I hardly sleep at night, but then I am so tired throughout the day. I am never hungry, and I only eat because I know I have to. My schoolwork is suffering so much that I might not get any O.W.L.'s. Let's face it: I'm a mess.

Other people were worried about me to. I heard the teachers talking about me, and my friends to. Tyler told me that I needed to get over David, but that just made me start to cry all over again. I had never in my life felt so crummy, and it sucked.

David, on the other hand, seemed to be in a good mood. He was normal looking. That girl, a sixth year Gryffendor, was always around him. According to everyone, they were only friends… but you never know. She isn't very nice, it talked to her once, but she seems to like David a lot… That scares me.

Sirius can really tell that something is wrong, since we are twins. I want to tell him so bad, but then I know that he would go and beat David up and that would not be good at all. He looks at me curiously all the time, and he is always coming up to me and hugging me, telling me that everything will be okay. I find those hugs very comforting.

When April started, so did the snowstorms. Flurries of snow everywhere. It was a very strange and unusual weather, considering it was usually sunny and warm around now. I didn't care though. The knew weather fitted my mood very well.

On the first day of April, a Thursday, it was very freezing and cold. I liked it. I went outside and laid in the snow. It felt good, surprisingly. I just laid there for a while, soaking up the freezing ness and the sense of security.

On Friday morning, the word was spread that Herbology was canceled. I was glad, since I was increasingly liking spending time alone somewhere. I was walking to the room of requirement when I heard someone talking behind a door. It was professor McGonnagall, Professor Flitwick, and my brother James.

"-not herself lately. Do you know why?" I heard professor McGonnagall ask James.

"No, Lily has been screwing up on the pitch to. She can't concentrate on anything." James said back.

I scowled. They were talking about me!

"She was such a good student to." Professor Flitwick said sadly.

"I'm going to send her to Madam Pomfrey tonight. Something is seriously wrong with Lily Potter. More then just pressure from exams." Professor McGonnagall said, sounding slightly worried.

I continued along down the corridor, waiting to get to the room of requirement. Then I passed another door where people were talking. I stopped and listened to this one to. This time I seemed to stumble on the very beginning of a conversation.

"Lily is really different lately, isn't she?" Tucker said, to who I'm guessing was Kelsey, Tess, and Tyler.

"No, more then a little different…" Tess said slowly. To me it sounded like she was thinking.

"She is depressed because David dumped her. He broke her heart, and she can't get over it! Her heart is already scarred from the rape, and now it doesn't want to heal p at all." Tyler said softly. I barely heard him, but I know that was what he said.

"Omigosh! I am so worried about Lily. She is falling behind in classes to." Kelsey said.

"I hear her tossing and turning all night, and then when she finally does fall asleep, she murmurs about things… she isn't sleeping well at all." Tess said to that.

"If you haven't noticed, she hasn't been eating either. She eats a little here, a little there. But not nearly as much as she used to." Tucker said, adding in his two Knuts.

I was rather angry. What were they doing, watching my every move? It drove me so nuts! I was ready to crack.

"I'm worried about her." Tyler said finally, and there was a murmur of yeses around him. I knew that they really were worried, and then I felt bad for being mad.

They really cared. I wasn't worth being cared about like that. I wasn't worth it at all. I decided to make it so they wouldn't have to care about me anymore.

I finally made it to the room of requirement. I carefully dipped a quill into paper and wrote out a long note. Then I left it on a desk, where, if they thought the right thing, I knew they would find it.

Then, I went back upstairs to my dorm. I gathered all of my stuff and put it into my trunk; nobody would have to do it later then. I made my bed, then I made my way to the stairs.

As I walked to my destination, I passed a lot of people. Most of them I didn't know, and most of them were happy. I wondered how they could be happy at a time like this. Well, I suppose they didn't have non-healing broken hearts, and they didn't have friends who cared too much.

As I was walking up to my destination, I was doing a lot of thinking. This really had been a good year, at least up until a month ago. I had two boyfriends, and I went form having one friend to having four. It was a good year, not counting the whole rape issue.

Then I lost my memory, and everything went downhill. Everything. David dumped me, my schoolwork spiraled down, and everybody was super worried about me. But the one person whose opinion mattered most, whom I wanted more then anything to notice me, didn't care. That was so bad that it had led me into a pit of depression, and now look at me. Look at what I was planning to do.

As I got to the top of the astronomy tower, I could feel my heart beating in my chest. I looked out from the top of it. I could see all of Hogwarts, and it was nice. I almost smiled. Almost; I hadn't really smiled in a month.

As I glanced around the grounds, there was nobody. I couldn't blame them, it really was cold outside. I was shivering, since all I had on were my robes and my clothes underneath. It's not like it mattered now anyway.

I pushed myself up onto the ledge. I looked down. There was a lot of snow down there. It was really high up. The astronomy tower is the highest point in the castle, which is why I picked it. I looked at my watch. It was half-an-hour until people who hadn't had their classes canceled would come out. I knew that it was now.

Then, right as I was ready, my mother and father's faces flashed before my eyes. I stopped. They had no idea what was going on. No idea at all. They thought their oldest daughter was perfectly happy here, they thought she was all nice and happy and getting good grades. They had no idea that their daughter was the opposite.

I was ready for this. My parents would have to deal. My friends would have to deal. I was almost ready when David's face flashed across my mind. I stopped again. This was all his fault in the first place. He broke my heart, then he went off and ignored me like I was something disgusting that crawled out of the closet. He was the one who made me miserable.

Deep down, I knew that wasn't true. It was my fault. I lost my memory, but I remembered my friends. I hadn't listened to them, and this is what happened. If had been a little more compassionate for David's feelings, and a little more trusting of my friends, David and I would still be together, and I wouldn't be in this horrible mess right now.

Finally, I made up my mind. I had to do it. I had to stop all of my friends from worrying about me, wondering if I was all right. I had to stop my teachers from wondering if I was going to do well in the next class, or screw up like I had been doing lately. Now my parents wouldn't have to worry if I was doing okay, they would also have one less kid to support.

The more I thought about it, the better it was. Well, maybe not the best idea for me, but for everybody else.

I stood up on the edge of the ledge. I looked all around, got the picture, and closed my eyes, wanting this to be my last view.

And I jumped.

_A/N: OMIGOSH! She jumped! Wow! Cliffhangers… aren't they wonderful?_ Okay, lets see if you guys can give me TEN reviews. If you give me TEN reviews, I will update by next Monday. If you don't, for every one less I will add two days. SO PLEASE REVIEW! Your reviews really do count, even if you don't think they do.


	18. Getting Back Up

_A/N: This is from third-person POV, David's._

David walked back to the castle. He had just finished his defense against the dark arts lesson, and now he was headed up to dinner. He walked the long way outside; he needed fresh air. All he could think about was Lily; she was so depressed lately. Then there was that girl, Erica, who seemed to like him… she was so nice, so not like Lily.

He continued to walk, wondering if he should make up with Lily and be friends. He really liked Erica, but not even half of the amount he liked Lily… As David walked, he glanced at the snow. He was walking, almost inside, when he saw a patch of red in the snow.

He hurried forward. The red was hair. Long, red hair. He looked up; there was the astronomy tower. He looked back down at the figure on the ground. Suddenly, his heart was pounding. He only knew one girl with hair that red. Lily. He turned the girl over, and sure enough, it was his Lily. He felt her face; it was like ice.

He ripped off his cloak and wrapped it around her. He found her wrist and looked for her pulse. It was there, but only just. He scooped her into his arms. His brain didn't seem to be working properly. He had the love of his life almost dead in his arms. His brain worked furiously, trying to come up with a place to go. Finally, he thought of one: the room of requirement.

So that's were he went. As he sprinted through his short cuts, he thought about where Lily was. Then it hit him. Lily had jumped off the top of the astronomy tower. She had tried to kill herself. With a stab of guilt, David realized it was because of him.

Soon, he got to the room of requirement. He got inside as fast as possible, and laid Lily down on the bed. Amazed at how light Lily had gotten, David pulled up her shirt slightly. He gasped. Her ribs were sticking out; she was just skin and bones.

As he searched the cabinet for something to make her get better, he could hear her breathing getting shallower. Soon, he found a potion that made the drinker instantly warm. He hurried over to Lily, pried her mouth open, and tipped it carefully into her mouth.

Then, he climbed onto the bed, and waited, praying that it worked. It did. After a few minutes, Lily opened her eyes. She looked around, as if she was trying to comprehend everything. She saw David.

With all the strength it looked like she had, she pushed herself out of bed. David knew she was weak, and sure enough, she was too weak to stand. David jumped up and caught her.

"No, let me go. You don't care. No one does." Lily said, struggling weakly against David's hold.

"No." David said firmly, and he pulled her back onto the bed. Lily continued to struggle, until she wore out the remaining strength she had. Finally, she gave up. She began to cry, and it was breaking his heart to see the one he loved in so much pain. He tried to hug her, but she shook her head no.

"I'm stupid. I'm ugly. Why would you want me? You don't care about me at all! No one does!" She sobbed.

David was shocked. He had done this much damage? All he had done was tell her that they couldn't be together… he had never known that she had loved him this much.

"Come here." He said softly, pulling the love of his life into his lap.

Lily continued to struggle away from him, until finally she stopped and cried into his shoulder. She cried for quite a long time to, until finally she fell asleep. David laid her down and sat down in a chair. He put his head in his hands. He had never known someone like her. She had loved him like no one else. Then she lost her memory, and couldn't remember loving him. She got with Alex again. But then, the second she got her memory back, she wanted him back to.

David realized how stupid he had been all along. Glancing at Lily sleeping, he felt an enormous stab of guilt. All because of him, Lily wasn't eating well, she wasn't sleeping well, she wasn't doing anything well. Her hair was red again. She was so depressed and it was all his fault.

When Lily awoke a few hours later, David was still sitting next to her. David looked up when he heard her stir. She opened her brilliant green eyes, and David felt his heart break for the millionth time that day. They were so full of hurt. Lily stared at him for a minute, then swung her legs over the bed.

"I'm going back to finish what I started." She muttered, walking towards the door. She was still weak, but she had enough strength to walk. David jumped up and darted toward the door.

"No, you are going to Madam Pomfrey." He told her.

"No, I am not. There is nothing wrong with me." She snapped. David wasn't about to let her go back to the astronomy tower, so he did some quick thinking, or tried to, at least. Lily tried to push her way past him. Without thinking, David gave her a huge bear hug. Lily was surprised, he could tell. Then she pushed him away.

"Don't. You're just going to make things harder for me." She said, her voice breaking and tears in her eyes.

"Make what harder?" David asked, bewildered.

"Your going to make getting over you harder, since you don't love me anymore." She said, the tears spilling over.

"Who says I want you to get over me? And hell yes I still love you." David said. He realized how untrue that must have looked to her, since he had been ignoring her fir quite awhile. He looked into her hurt-filled eyes again.

"Just come to madam Pomfrey, please." He said, and she stared back into his eyes. Finally, she nodded.

David took her to madam Pomfrey. About half way there, the energy that she had regained was gone, so David had to carry her. Once they got to the hospital wing, David set Lily down on a bed, and told Madam Pomfrey everything.

"But why didn't she..er.. die?" I mean, the astronomy tower is really high." David said curiously.

Madam Pomfrey looked thoughtful. "I believe it was because she did not truly wish to die. Being magical, her heart over took her mind and slowed her before she hit the ground. It happens every once in a while. Ms. Potter was very lucky." She told him.

David sighed. He had almost taken Lily's life, in a way. "I suggest you go and get some sleep. I need to have a talk with Lily tonight. No visitors until Sunday, at least. I will trust you to tell her worried friends what happened." Madam Pomfrey told him kindly, and David left. Lily had fallen asleep again, so he couldn't even say good-bye.

When he got back up to the common room, he headed straight for his bed. He lay there thinking for a long time, then he finally fell asleep. He didn't sleep for very long though, afraid for what Lily might try to do. Maybe she would try to leave and jump again…

Finally, he gave up and went down to the common room. There, he found Tess, Kelsey, Tucker and Sirius, all looking worried. When David came down stairs, they rushed over to him.

"Do you know where Lily is David? Please tell me you do!" Tess said, crying.

David sighed heavily. "Sit down, let me tell you the whole story."

When he was done telling, they all looked horrified. Tess was crying weakly, pushing Tucker away. David knew how she felt. She had almost lost her best friend in the whole world. She wanted to be alone, but Tucker was trying to comfort her.

"Tucker, she wants to be alone. When she needs someone, she will come to you." David told him, trying to be nice. Tucker gave up and let Tess cry. She ran up to her dorm, and was soon followed by Kelsey. Kelsey was supposed to be on bed rest, but it was to hard for her to sit and watch everything happen.

All weekend, all David could do was worry. He couldn't do anything else. He made frequent visits to the hospital wing, hoping he could visit Lily, but each time madam Pomfrey shook her head at him. Finally, on Sunday night, Madam Pomfrey nodded.

David hurried in and to the bed where Lily was. She was sitting up and reading a book. She looked a million times better then she had lately. She had some color in her cheeks, and her hair was much shinier. She looked up when he came over, but then looked down at her book.

"Hi." She said softly.

"Hey." David said back.

"Why are you here? You don't love me, and coming over and pretending that you do is just making everything harder for me!" Lily said, but her voice was strong, rather then the weak one she had been using lately.

David looked down at his hands. Of course he still loved Lily, he loved her so much that he would do anything for her. But he knew that it was his fault that she thought otherwise.

"Just go." Lily told him softly. And he did. He knew that if he stayed he would just make things worse.

David waited that night until Tess came back to get all the details about Lily, since she wouldn't tell him herself.

"She was treated for depression. She has a potion that she has to take every morning for the next two weeks, then once every other day, then once every three days, and so on." Tess told him. David nodded. He knew there was more.

Tess hesitated. Finally, she said, "The reason she was so depressed is because you don't love her. Madam Pomfrey said that because we are so young, Lily doesn't know the difference between real love and puppy love, so she is likely to lapse back into depression again. She needs you David. You can't give up on her. You have to try." Tess told him. David could see it in her eyes that he would have to try.

David did try. Every single day, he did everything he could to try and get Lily to like him again. Nothing worked. She was now going to group therapy a few nights a week, and her O.W.L's were almost here, so she was almost always working. David could see that she was getting a lot better. Her hair was now back to dark red.

David finally was about to try leaving Lily alone for a while, and see if that would work any better. Then, as he turned to leave, he heard a scream from upstairs. Lily, who he had been talking with, sprang up and shot like a rocket down the stairs, and returned almost as quickly with a sobbing Kelsey.

"My water broke! Somebody get Matt!" She cried, and David sprang up. He darted up to his dorm, where Matt was reading a book. David yanked Matt off the bed, and down the stairs.

"Hey, What the hell-" Matt said, but then he saw Kelsey sobbing. David ran over to the fire and grabbed a box of floo powder from the mantle. The three of them hurried over. Lily looked terrified, Matt looked the same, but Kelsey appeared to be in a lot of pain. David thrust the box toward Kelsey and Matt first.

"St. Mungo's!" They cried together, and they were spinning off. David offered the box to Lily, who took some.

"Come on, we can get there faster if we do it together." Lily said, sounding like it was the last thing she wanted to do. But they went together any way, and rushed to the front desk at St. Mungo's.

"Were was Kelsey Weasley taken to? She arrived here a few minutes ago." David asked, since Lily seemed unable to open her mouth. The witch standing there pointed to the right down a hallway.

"Room number seven." She said, and David and Lily hurried down the hallway. Room number seven wasn't very far. They turned to go in, but a healer was in the way.

"I'm sorry, there is some critical complications with the pregnancy. I'm afraid that you cannot come in. We will notify you as soon as something happens." The healer said, sounding apologetic.

David and Lily had no choice but to turn around and go back to the waiting room, and well, wait. They did wait for a long time. Apparently Lily wasn't completely better, since she started to cry the second they sat down.

"Omigosh, what if she loses the baby or something? It would be all my fault. How come Matt is allowed in there with her? He isn't even the father!" Lily wailed, and David pulled her into his lap. He hated so much to see her cry. This time Lily did nothing to try and escape. She just buried her head in his neck and continued to cry.

As her fragile body shook against him, David could think of nothing to make Lily happy. She continued to cry until she fell asleep. David eventually fell asleep to. Lily, who had sat up, awaked him. There was a healer standing there.

"We have the news on Kelsey Weasley's child." He said.

_A/N: How did you like this chapter? I liked this one a lot, for my own reasons… Please review! Thank you to my reviewers for the last chapter, I really appreciate it. Now, why don't you leave me some more reviews? I would love that so much, since reviews make my day sometimes._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To the readers of this story._


	19. Being Strong

_A/N: The usual: thanks so my reviewers and readers. Oh, and this is back in Lily's POV._

_Disclaimer: I. Don't. Own. Harry. Potter. Period._

_Dedication: To my volleyball coach, who has no sense of compassion whatsoever._

I stared at the healer, terrified. I was dimly aware that David's arms were around me, and that I was on his lap, but that didn't matter. Kelsey's baby is what matters now.

"Kelsey gave birth to a baby boy. He was stillborn. I'm sorry." The healer said, sounding grave.

I burst into to tears. The healer shuffled away, saying we could go and see Kelsey. I couldn't move, I couldn't think, all I could do was cry. David held me, until finally I realized that I was in his lap. I pushed myself off him and onto a chair of my own.

"Come on Lily, it's okay." David said, sounding tired.

I ignored him. I decided it was a good time to go and visit Kelsey, so I got up and shuffled into the hallway, and down to Kelsey's room. When I pushed open the door, Kelsey was lying on her bed, tears rolling down her face. I rushed over to her, and hugged her. She looked at me sadly.

"I saw him, Lily. He was so beautiful." Kelsey sobbed, and I sobbed with her. I almost had a nephew, and now my cousin was in agony. I glanced over at Matt. David, who had followed me, was talking to him softly. Matt seemed really distraught. I turned my attention back to Kelsey. Her hair was everywhere, and she looked tired.

"You need sleep." I told her softly, and she shook her head miserably. I knew she did, since her body needed to regenerate. I sang her a lullaby, and she was asleep within minutes. As I sat in the chair next to her, I realized that was the first time I had sang in months. I missed the sound of my own voice. I sat there for a while with my head in my hands, until David came and sat next to me.

"You know, Lily, every thing is going to be okay." David told me softly. I shook my head. Nothing was going to be okay. I was diagnosed with depression, and I was taking stuff for it, but it took a few months for the stuff to fully kick in, so now I was still all depressed. David was making it worse. I was trying so hard to forget about everything in the past, but David was hard to forget.

"Can you leave me alone David? I'm trying so hard to forget everything between you and me. You don't love me, and I am trying to forget about you." I told David sadly.

I stayed at the hospital the whole Day with Kelsey. Eventually, her parents came by, and quite a few of my relatives. They all told Kelsey how sorry they were. My mom came by and talked to her, and her and me had a little chat. We hadn't really talked last time I saw her, since I was to depressed to do anything.

"So when did you and David get together?" She said, and this time I knew she wanted an answer.

"Christmas." I said, looking at my hands.

"Why didn't you tell me?" My mom said, and I looked up at her. She was looking sad. Sometimes I hate my mom, sometimes I love her. Right now, I loved her and I was glad she was my mom. I could feel a flood of tears coming.

"I love you Mommy." I said, and she told me she loved me to.

I went back to school that evening. Kelsey was coming back on Sunday night, but she would go back to school on Tuesday. The first thing I did when I got back was go up to my dorm and cry. I never knew that this could be so hard. I was starting to get better, and then something like this happens. David was insistent that he did love me.

Later that night, I couldn't sleep, so I got up and went down to the common room. David was there. I turned around to go back up before he saw me, but I wasn't quick enough.

"Lils, come here. We need to talk." He told me, speaking softly.

I hesitated for a second, before going down to sit next to him on a couch.

"Lily, why are you so insistent that I don't love you? Why do you want to forget about me so much?" David asked me, and I knew that he, like my mom, wanted real answers this time.

"Because you don't love me! You love that stupid other girl, and she likes you to. I am trying to get over depression, and you keep bringing up the memories that I am trying to forget." I said, crying. That's one thing about depression: you cry. A lot.

"You mean Erica? No, I don't love her! I love you Lily! More then anyone." David said.

"Then why were you flirting with her the other day?" I asked, still crying. David looked abashed. He had no way to explain that one.

"Listen Lily" David said, taking her hands in his, "I love you. I really do. I hate so much to see you hurting like this." David said, and his voice was so caring that Lily went from crying to sobbing.

"It's just so hard. I was starting to feel better then Kelsey has a stillborn baby and…" I said, but I was overcome by sobs. David tried once again to pull me into his lap. This time, I let him. I cried on his shoulder for a long time. He was so patient with me, he just let me cry.

When the tears were done running their course, I looked at David. He stared solemnly back. I was so hesitant to do anything with him, but more then anything I wanted to. I wanted to kiss him and hug him and tell him I loved him, but I couldn't. He needed to do it first.

As though sensing my thoughts, he pulled me forward slightly. I was so mistrusting of everything now, even more then I was before. He kissed me lightly on the lips. I let him kiss me for a few seconds before he pulled away.

"I'm sorry. We need to go slower." I told him softly. He sighed, but he nodded. He got up, bade me good night, and left. I felt bad. I made him feel like he was pressuring me, I knew it. I watched him leave, and then I pondered a few things.

Why was I so hesitant to love all of a sudden? I mean, I was raped and I had no problem loving David, once I had healed a bit. Now, when I needed love more then ever, I was so hesitant to admit that I loved him, or let myself believe I was loved. I didn't want to get hurt again.

On Monday when classes started, I confessed this to Tyler, hoping he would say some of his nice advice that he gives me sometimes.

"I'm sorry, Lily, but you have to work through this one on your own. You can do it, I know you can. You have to be strong." He told me. This advice meant nothing to me, since I was already trying to be strong.

When David came to sit next to me at lunch, he tried to hold my hand. I pulled back, once again hesitant. He looked at me, confused.

"I'm sorry!" I said, and I jumped up and left. I wasn't hungry anymore. I know that Madam Pomfrey said that if I didn't eat, she would force feed me food, but I figured this was okay. I had gained back a lot of the wait I had lost. I was just not hungry back…then and now I am sometimes.

I went up to my dorm, where Tess was hurriedly finishing her essay for our class.

"What happened now?" she said, looking up and seeing my face.

"I don't get it! Why can't I let myself love?" I said, throwing myself onto my bed. I held back my tears; I didn't want pity, just someone to talk with.

"You have to be strong Lily." Tess told me softly, sitting down.

"I know that already! Tyler told me that, and now you, and I am being strong!" I snapped, angry that she thought I was being weak.

"Tell me, why wont you admit that you still love David and that you aren't going to get over him anytime soon?" Tess asked me gently.

"Because…because… I don't want to get hurt again!" I burst out, crying finally (Where were these tears coming from? They were overflowing!).

Tess stared at me as though she thought I was being incredibly stupid.

"What?" I said, angry that I told her what was wrong and all she could do was look at me like I'm a dork?

"You just said it. You need to be strong." Tess said again.

"I didn't say anything about being strong!" I snapped, and Tess sighed.

"I am clearly not getting to you and neither did Tyler. I suppose you will get it in time…maybe when it's to late." Tess said softly.

I stalked off. Tess hadn't helped me at all. She had given me the same bologna that Tyler had. Didn't they understand? No, they didn't. I went to my next class and sat in front of the door for the rest of lunch, reading a book. Nobody bothered me. I liked being alone, but I missed the way I used to be: happy.

The next morning, Tuesday, Kelsey went back to school. Everybody was whispering about her. I felt bad, but there was nothing I could do. All day, people had come up to her and asked her about the baby, asking if it was okay. Each time, I watched Kelsey tell them that he was a stillborn. I couldn't believe how strong she was being.

Matt was by her side as much as possible. He was still in love with Kelsey. I could tell that he was really sad about the baby to. He had wanted to be a father, even if it was sixteen. Marissa was around Kelsey quite a lot to. I could see that Kelsey was hanging out a lot with her old crowd. She wasn't pregnant anymore, so her "friends" no longer treated her like an outcast. I guess that meant that I was out.

That made me kind of mad that the second that Kelsey stopped being pregnant, she would go to her old friends who had deserted her for support. Not me, the one who forgot all about the fights and the tears back when we weren't friends to help her. But, once again, I was wrong.

"Lily, I hope you know that I appreciate you so much, and I'm not sure I have said this, but I'm sorry about back when we were younger. And thanks for everything to do with the baby. You're the nest cousin anyone could ever ask for." Kelsey told me Tuesday after lessons. I smiled one of my rare smiles.

That night, I was one of the last people in the common room doing my homework. There was a Quiditch practice that had run late, and now I was paying for it. Our final game was on Saturday, and I was nervous. I sat there doing my homework for awhile when David came in.

"Hey Lily." He said when he saw me, coming to sit next to me.

"Hey yourself." I said, not looking up.

"Lils, we need to talk." He said softly. As much as I didn't want to, I looked up into his eyes. I could feel myself melt.

"Why wont you let yourself love me? I love you, you know that." David said, looking at me sadly.

"I just don't want to get hurt." I said, looking at my hands.

"That's what everyone means about being strong." David said.

I looked into his eyes again, and he kissed me. A real kiss this time, not a light little peck. This time I didn't pull back.


	20. The Quiditch Cup

A/N: Dum-da-dum-dum. Hi, review, bye 

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter_

_Dedication: To girls. If you're a boy, I'm sorry, but this one goes out to all girls everywhere._

When David and I stopped kissing, I was confused. I was positive that David didn't love me, but all of a sudden this feeling inside me said _trust him_. It was the potion finally taking full effect. I was almost back to the way I was. But still, there was that lingering feeling that David really didn't want me back.

_But you just kissed him! _ I reminded myself, but it was hard to let everything that had happened go. I finally got what everyone meant by being strong. They seemed to know me better then I knew myself. It was a scary thought, but it was true. It was almost like it was their job to make sure I made the right decisions.

"Why would you love a girl like me, David?" I asked David carefully, wondering if I was about to have my heart broken all over again.

"Because you're independent, yet you need people around you. You're loving and nice and you know how to forgive and forget. Your smart, and your not afraid to do something even it makes people laugh at you. And you're a wonderful friend. Oh, and you're the most beautiful, awesome, sweetest girl ever." David told me, and I felt myself blush.

"That's not true." I said, snorting. This time I wasn't doubtful because I was all depressed, but because I knew it wasn't true.

David took my hands in his. "Yes, Lily, It is true. Maybe you can't see it, but I can. Most people can see that you are every one of those things I just said. Trust me Lily!" He said, and there was a note of desperation in his voice at the end. I looked at him for a second. He looked so cute.

"I just don't want to get hurt again!" I said for the second time that night, and this time I started crying.

David pulled me close, and I cried on his shoulder. I was crying everything out, all of my worries, everything. When I was done, I looked at David. I felt so much better. It was like since I finally cried and voiced my fear at the same time, it got lesser. Just saying it didn't mean anything, and neither did crying. They had to be together.

"Lily!" He said, and I was wondering what he was talking about. He conjured a mirror and handed it to me. I grabbed it and looked at myself. My eyes were glowing purple! All of a sudden, all of the memories from the past month or two were flashing before my eyes. I had no idea what was happening, but I knew that it must be something important.

I opened my eyes. I was breathing hard like I had just run a mile. David was staring back at me, looking worried. I sat up. I rubbed my eyes. I looked at David, and I realized something. I felt different. Really different. David continued to watch me as I thought about how I felt different. Finally I realized how I felt different. I was better.

Madam Pomfrey had told me that for some people taking the potion, something would happen to them so they would know that there were completely cured of depression. I thought she meant like a chandelier falling on them or something. Now I realized this was what she meant. I was completely undepressed. It felt wonderful.

I grinned at David, who was still looking at me worriedly.

"I'm all better!" I cried, suddenly feeling better then I had in months. I jumped up from were I had been on the couch and grabbed the mirror, which was on the floor, and examined my eyes to see if they were still purple. I looked at them. They were back to bright green and I was glad. Suddenly, I had a new appreciation for things like that.

"David? I'm sorry." I told David, still hoping around with my newfound energy.

"For what?" He said, looking curious and truly having no idea.

"For making this so hard for you. You know, saying you didn't really love me and all. I know now that you do." I told him, sitting down next to him.

He smiled at me. I leaned forward and kissed him this time. It was a long kiss, and quite a bit harder then the last kiss. The last one I had been hesitant, but now I wasn't. It was like with my depression being all gone, my trustfulness came back.

"I love you Lily." David whispered into my ear.

"I love you to."

The rest of the week, I was absolutely euphoric. I couldn't stop grinning, and I had boundless energy. I went to see madam Pomfrey, and she told me that I was very lucky to be one of the few who had a reaction like that. It was pretty rare. She also told me that I would have a ton of energy all week, and I would be extremely happy, but then the happiness would go back to a normal state, and I would be like I used to be, at least for the most part.

Everybody noticed the difference, but nobody more then me. Another thing Madam Pomfrey told me was that the reason why I was only feeling a little of the effects of the potion was because it was all building up to the climax. I was actually hungry for once, I ate more then I usually do all day just at breakfast. I could concentrate in class, and it seemed much easier.

On Saturday it was the final Quiditch match. I don't know the exact odds of us winning, but I knew that we had to score at least a hundred points before I could catch the snitch. I was worried, because we were playing Slytherin and I wanted to beat them more then anything.

On Saturday, it was cold and cloudy, but I didn't mind. I don't mind playing in the clouds; I like it actually. It's easier to see. Anyways, the team shuffled onto the field. I looked at the smug looks on the Slytherins face and more then anything I wanted to beat them. I saw one of them point at me. I shuffled closer to hear what they were saying

"-all depressed, so she will play like crap. Don't bother playing your hardest, she sucks now. Thank goodness to whatever made her unhappy." The caption told to what I'm guessing is the seeker.

I held back a grin. They didn't know that I was all good and happy now. They thought I was still all unhappy. They were in for a major surprise.

They were surprised, not by me, but by the whole team. They all showed such a passion for playing. The whole time, James didn't shout one thing because we were all playing to well. We were soon winning by eighty points. I knew that there was just a few more and we would win!

We scored another goal, so I started to keep my eye out for the snitch. Something hit me in the back of the head. Thinking it was a bird, I reached my hand behind me to grab whatever to was. My hand closed around something cold and round. I pulled my hand forward. I was holding the snitch. The game was tied, but it was over.

"What happens now?" I asked David as we flew to the ground. The whole team was glaring at me because I might have cost us the game.

"I'm not sure. I don't ever remember there being a tie." David said, frowning.

"Captains over here please!" Madam Hooch called, and James and the Slytherin Captain came forward.

"Now, we are going to have a tiebreaker. You have two choices. You may either have your chasers try and score and whoever scores most in five minutes wins, or you can see which of your seekers can catch the snitch faster." Madam Hooch told them, and they both frowned, thinking.

"We are going to pick the seekers." James said, and the Slytherin captain thought about that. Finally he nodded, and the Slytherin Chaser and me came on. I remembered that they still thought I was all depressed, so I attached a sullen look to my face.

"Three, two, one, GO!" Madam Hooch shouted, and I rose like a bullet into the air. I looked everywhere, and for once I wasn't distracted by anything else, but neither was the Slytherin seeker.

We both looked for about ten minutes. I could hear the crowd getting impatient, but there was nothing I could do. The snitch was nowhere to be found. Then, I saw it. Hovering near one of the goal posts was the snitch. I was close to it, and I sped over to it. I grabbed it easily, since the Slytherin Chaser was on the opposite end of the field.

"AND GRYFFENDOR WINS!" The announcer shouted, and I grinned. It had been too easy to catch that snitch. I grinned at my team as I flew down. They grinned back at me, forgetting that it was my fault that we almost didn't win. David kissed me when I flew down, and the rest of the team hugged me. I looked over at the Slytherin team. The captain was yelling at the seeker for not following me around.

The spectators spilled onto the field, and Tess, Tucker, Tyler, and Kelsey all ran toward us. Kelsey looked happier then she had in days. Tyler had been supporting Gryffendor to, since he was in Ravenclaw. I grinned at all them, and Tess hugged me. I hugged her back, grinning. We had won the Quiditch cup for the fourth year running. With a start, I realized we had started winning since I joined the team. Well, since me and Sirius joined the team, but still.

All of us made our way back to the Gryffendor Tower. Sirius and David snuck off while we were walking, and I figured it was to go to Hogsmade and get some party food and stuff. I was too happy to care that David wasn't there. I hadn't been happy like I had been lately in forever.

The rest of April flew by. I was always surrounded by my friends and David. Most of the time we were doing homework, but occasionally we just talked. I went back to my normal moods, but now I appreciated things a little more. I had a second chance at life and I am going to live it right.

I put my hair back to its natural red color and gave it highlights instead. I was proud of having my mother's hair. Actually, I don't know if it's my grandmother Lily's hair or my mother's hair, but it doesn't matter. I'm still proud of it. I told Kelsey this, and she laughed, but she agreed with me.

She showed me that her hair isn't really blonde, but reddish-blonde. "I'm going to let it go natural to." She told me, and I grinned.

On May second, I had a career meeting with Professor McGonnagall.

"So, Lily, what would you like to be when you get out of school?" Professor McGonnagall asked me, and I thought about all of the packets I had looked through that morning.

"I think that I might want to be a teacher." I said shyly. I hadn't told anybody this, not even Tess.

"Well, what subject would you like to teach?" Professor McGonnagall asked, and I thought about my answer. I really liked Charms, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to teach it. I liked Transfiguration and Herbology, but I didn't really want to teach those. Potions was a definite no.

"I want to teach Defense against the Dark Arts." I said, and I knew that's what I really wanted to teach.

"Okay, then you need a NEWT O in Defense against the Dark Arts, an E in Charms, and an A in Potions, and Transfiguration. You may take one other class to." Professor McGonnagall said, and I nodded.

"I'll do it. I want Arithmacy for my other class." I said, feeling slightly confident and unconfident at the same time.

"You need an OWL in all of those classes, but at least an E in Potions and Transfiguration." She told me, and I nodded. I got up to leave, wondering if I could ever make and E in transfiguration and an E in Potions.

A/N: Review 


	21. OWLs and Jobs

_A/N: Okay, ten reviews, and I give you a chapter next Wednesday . Oh, and remember, James takes his NEWTs this year._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter_

_Dedication: You guys._

The whole week was dedicated to OWLs. We prepared in every possible way for them in lessons, going over simple things that we had learned in first year to things we had only learned a month or so before. I no longer had classes with Tyler, and I really missed his presence. I had gotten accustomed to having him near.

Sunday night, all the fifth and seventh years went to be early so that they were awake the next day, for the next day was the start of exams. I was thoroughly nervous, and I didn't fall asleep for a while. David assured me that things were going to be okay, but I wasn't as smart as him. He had gotten good exam grades.

When I woke up that morning, I had to remember what was so scary that was happening. Then it hit me with a jolt: exams. I didn't want to get up, but if I wanted to be a teacher then I had to at least take the exams. So, I dragged myself out of bed and down to the dining hall for breakfast.

After breakfast, the fifth years left for a brief period, and when we returned, the dining hall had been transformed to be a giant classroom, with several hundred desks. All of the fifth years were seated in alphabetical order, and we were given exam papers for the first exam: Transfiguration.

Looking back on two weeks later when exams were finished, I figured I hadn't done to badly. I think I passed everything, but I could be wrong; History of Magic was tough to say. I can't really remember much from the past two weeks, but I don't think that any fifth year can. They were a flurry of studying, eating, taking an exam, studying again, and then taking another exam. Then the whole process started over the next day.

We were free over the weekend to do as we liked, and we were free for the rest of the school year. The rest of the school wouldn't take exams until the following week, so the fifth and seventh years almost had free range of the castle, since everyone else was studying.

David had laughed at me for being so serious about studying, and he kept interrupting me, and now I had my chance to do the same to him.

"Lils! Enough! You were right, studying is serious. I'm sorry for bothering you. Now can you leave me alone?" David snapped as I tickled him. I stuck my tongue out at him, knowing that he would get really mad if I kept going,

I wandered around for a while, having nothing in particular to do. I wandered past the defense against the dark arts classroom, and Professor Boot came out. He is pretty old, and I was hoping that he would retire around the time I was ready to be a teacher for that position.

"Ms. Evens!" He called after me, and I turned around.

"Excuse me?" I said, surprised he had called me that.

"Oh, excuse me, I meant Ms. Potter. You look extraordinarily like your late grandmother… Do come into my office, I would like to talk with you." He said, and I followed. That wasn't the first time I had been called Ms. Evens; McGonnagall, Flitwick, and Hagrid sometimes made the same mistake. I guess I do look more like Lily then my mother.

Once we were in his office, he made a cup of tea, one for him and one for me, then he observed me.

"So, Ms. Potter, Professor McGonnagall informs me that you would like to become a defense against the Dark Arts Teacher. Now, a teaching job takes a lot of patience, and I know you have that, at least when you want it. I have a few things that would help you to become better at teaching over the summer." He told me.

I nodded, intrigued. He held out a pamphlet, which I took. Skimming through it, I figured out what it was. It was for Hogwarts students either starting as a first year or second year, and it was a program that taught about defense against the dark arts, the basic stuff. I didn't get what he wanted me to do, and I told him.

He smiled. "Lily, I run this program. I have older students that I teach during the summer also, so I can't always be with this group. I would like you to come and teach them. You would become a master of the basics, and become a better teacher. Of course, I will pay you…" He said, and a grin unfurled on my face.

Seeing my grin and interpreting in corrects, Professor Boot went on, "The hours are Monday through Thursday, Ten to Four, and on Fridays it's ten to Two and we have a little show to see who has improved much. You salary would be about a galleon an hour. So, would you be interested?" He asked, gazing at me.

"Yes!" I said, knowing that this would be a great experience.

"Excellent! Come and see me before you go home and I will give a bit more information. I suggest you save your money, because you will want it later. Good-Day Lily." He said, and I got up and bounded up to the common room. I couldn't wait to tell someone about my new job.

Tess and Kelsey were there, talking about something. I took a moment to think about how much things had changed over the past year. Kelsey had changed form a snotty slut to the cousin I knew when I was younger. Anyways, they looked up when I came over to them.

"Guess who has a job this summer!" I blurted out, and they both looked at me.

"Let me guess: You." Tess said, grinning at me.

I nodded and filled them in on all of the details. They looked happy for me. I was happy for me to

When the start of the summer started, everybody was happy that I had a job except David.

"We wont get to spend any time together!" He snapped one day when I asked him why it bothered him so much. I just ignored him, because for once I was doing something important.

On the morning of June Twenty-first, was my first day. It was also the day that my OWLs came. Sirius and James got their results to. The three of us all opened them one by one. Sirius and I let James go first. He wanted to be an Auror, so his results were most important.

"I passed." James sighed in relief, but he didn't read out what he got. Sirius snatched them out of his hands, wanting to know.

"Hey, all outstandings and one exceeds expectations." Sirius shouted, and James sulked. I knew he didn't want to gloat that his scores were good. I stuck my tongue out him. Sirius opened his scores next. He wants to work in the department of Magical Catastrophes.

"A, A, E, A, E, E, E, A, D, P" he read off, only him knowing what he got. I laughed. He passed everything, except history of magic and Divination.

Now, I opened mine with my heart pulsing. _Transfiguration: E, Muggle Studies: E, Astronomy: A, History of Magic: A, Arithmacy: E, Herbology: A, Care of Magical Creatures: A, Charms: O, Defense Against the Dark Arts: O, Potions: E._

I collapsed onto a chair. I had made all the scores I needed. There was also a list of books we would need and so on. Sirius and James grabbed my scores, as did my other siblings who had wandered in. I got up and left for work.

I got there at nine, since Professor Boot wanted to give me an orientation.

"Okay, Lily, start with basic spells like shields and stunners, but by the end of summer some of the better students should have moved up a bit. Stop for lunch around twelve. Here are your robes." Said Professor Boot, handing me a set of midnight blue robes and a hat. I hurried to the bathroom to put them on, and when I came out the first students were there.

I smiled at them, but I couldn't help feeling slightly nervous. What if they were all cheeky little snot rags?

I spaced out when Professor Boot explained most of the procedures. I didn't come back into focus until he pointed to me.

"This Is Lily Potter, and she will be teaching the youngest group. You guys have special permission to use magic outside of Hogwarts when you are here, so I suggest you don't abuse the privilege." He said, and the group of about a hundred people slowly moved into four groups about twenty-five each.

I took my group to my section, a large room that would work well. I didn't know where to began. Most of them hadn't started Hogwarts yet, but there were about ten soon to be second years.

"Ummm, Why don't we start with introducing ourselves? I'm Lily…" I said, and the rest of them followed.

Intrigued that they do what I tell them, I continued on.

"Okay, does anyone know how to do a shield spell?" I asked, and one of the second years snapped, "No, that's why we are here." Everyone around her laughed, and I looked at her. I knew she was going to be one of those people who test your every nerve. I looked away, and demonstrated the correct form of shield charm.

"Okay, now remember the incantation and get into partners. Practice throwing jinxes at the shield." I said, and that girl said haughtily, "We don't know any jinxes either. And are we just supposed to guess that we have to make a shield?" I couldn't look at her, because I knew that she was right.

"Alright, cast the shield spell around yourselves, and your partner come and kick it." I said, already wary. I had only been here two hours and already they were getting on my nerves. They were getting better though.

By the end of the day, almost every member of my class could cast a shield spell. I was proud. The nerve-testing girl, Ayla, got it down right away. I wondered why she was even here, since she was clearly really good. She looked older then the rest of them, maybe thirteen rather then twelve or eleven.

That night, before I went home, I went to Diagon Alley with my first days pay. It was seven galleons. Not to much, but enough to get something. I walked around until I decided that I needed some joke or something. I went to my uncle's joke shop.

They were they for once, amazingly. There business has gotten so big that they are hardly ever at one given shop for more then half an hour.

"Hey Lily, may we interest you in anything?" Fred said, grinning at me. Then he noticed my midnight robes, and he scowled.

"Why aren't you working here for us?" He said, and I shrugged, explaining to him my job.

"Sure, desert your family." He said, but I knew he was joking.

I walked around the shop for a while, looking at everything. Fred and George had managed to shrink some more animals, and now instead of Pygmy Puffs, there were about ten different kinds of pets. I looked through them all until I decided that I would have to get one.

After a lot of debating, I chose a miniature Strackle, something like a kitten. It was really cute, and it was all hyper. As I pulled out my galleons to pay for it, George shook his head.

"For you, it's free. Just come again." George said, and I grinned at him. Knowing it was time for me to be home, I gave them each a hug and headed out.

_A/N: Remember, ten reviews._


	22. Ayla for Real

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. I appreciate them.

Disclaimer: I Don't Own Harry Potter.

Dedication: I don't know… to the sky.

I ended up loving work. Once I got to know my group, it was a lot easier. Except for Ayla, they all seemed to like me. Ayla continued to push my buttons, and I couldn't yell at her or anything because then I would get fired. All I could do was glare in her direction.

On the second Friday I was at work, Ayla pushed my buttons a little too much.

"PETRIFICUS TOTALAS!" I screamed at her, spinning around after she had proclaimed learning shield spells was "to easy". Ayla's eyes widened as the spell hit her, and I could feel my own widen in horror. I hadn't lost my temper like that in ages.

I flicked my wand quickly, and Ayla slowed before her frozen body hit the ground. All of my students were looking at me in both interest and horror. I walked over to Ayla and propped her up.

"So, if that was to easy, let me see you get out of this one without speaking, and then we will see what is easy and what's not," I snarled at her. She had her wand in her hand, and I knew she could flick it a little bit, because my spell wasn't that strong.

I knew there was no way she would be able to get out of it; I could barely do it. David had told me about it last year, and I had practiced a bit. I know how to do a little bit, but I'm dreading it this year when I have to do it.

Anyway, the whole class and I watched as Ayla's struggled to free herself. She couldn't, that was obvious, having no idea how to and not being able to move. I could see her face flushing with embarrassment, so I undid the spell.

"How did you like that?" I asked her, and she mumbled something.

"What was that?" I said, and she shouted, "I DIDN'T!" I looked at her, and there were tears glistening in her eyes; apparently I hit a soft spot. She didn't like being proven incompetent. She wiped her eyes quickly, looking angry, but wanting to prove herself.

"Okay, if you can all make a successful shield that I can't break with a jelly-legs curse, then I will teach you something new. Otherwise, we continue to do shields." I told my group.

Even though everyone had made a shield by the second day, very few had been able to make one that actually deflected something. Ayla's had been excellent, as much as I hated to admit. I still was trying to figure out why she was here, considering how good she was at things like this.

I went by and tested each of my students. When I was through them, I was pleased to see that they had all done a shield successfully.

"Okay, now that you know how to do shields, we are going to learn how to use the impediment jinx. I know I said you wouldn't be learning many jinxes, but I changed my mind. Today, we are going to be practicing on mice, and if I ever catch you using this spell on another student, I will throw you out of this class. Do you guys understand?" I told them, and all of them nodded with wide eyes. All if them accept one, of course.

"You don't have the power to kick us out." Said Ayla.

"Oh yes, I do, and let me guarantee that if someone goes, it will be you." I snapped at her, and her face flushed again.

"Oh Yeah?" She challenged, and I retorted, "Yeah."

I glared at her, and she seemed to lose some of her confidence. I had no intention of fighting with her or dueling with her or anything, but I could tell that she thought I had every intention of doing one of those things.

Finally, she backed down.

"You and I are going to have a little talk when everyone goes out into the courtyard at two." I informed her, and she just scowled.

"Anyways, back to impediment jinxes." I said as if nothing had happened.

When my class filed out, Ayla remained behind.

"Sit." I told her, and she did, though reluctantly.

I took a long look at her. She was really pretty; she looked a lot like Tyler. She has long black hair and blue eyes. She glared right back up at me.

"Why are you so keen to challenge my judgment?" I asked her, and she scowled, not wanting to answer.

I raised my eyebrows, and her scowl lessened.

"Because you are blind." She said, and I had no idea what she was talking about.

My confusion must have shown on my face because she continued, "You chase after something because you think that's what you want, making you blind to what is right in front of you." She said, sounding much older then twelve.

I pondered what she said for a second, having truly no idea what she was talking about.

"Why are you in this class, Ayla?" I asked her, using a much gentler voice.

Ayla seemed more interested in talking normally now that she had told me why she hated me.

"Because I have nothing to do over the summer." She said.

"But you're so good! I mean, what I put you in today I can barely do." I said, and Ayla appeared very pleased by my compliment.

"My brother teaches me a lot." She said, and I smiled. Ayla was really not that bad of a kid; just she seemed to like holding grudges.

"Would you like to be my assistant then? You have to stop challenging everything I tell you to do, but you could help me teach some stuff." I asked her, and her whole face lit up.

"Yes!" She exclaimed, and I smiled.

"Come on, let's go out and watch the end of the show." I told her, and we left the room.

I was walking out towards the courtyard when I saw Tyler coming towards me.

"Hey Ty." I called, and he waved in greeting. We met up, and he asked, "Why aren't you at the show?"

I told him how I was talking with a student, and I went to point at her, but she disappeared. I shrugged and he smiled.

"Why are you here?" I asked, and he smiled, "I came to see you." He said, and I smiled back.

He walked me over to a bench and we sat down. I told him about my summer so far, and he told me about his.

"You know what the girl I was talking to said? She said I'm blind to what is right in front of me. She says I'm chasing after something that isn't important." I said. Ayla hadn't said that what I was chasing after wasn't important, but I knew she meant it.

"Did she?" Tyler said, surprising gleaming on his face.

"What do you think I am chasing after?" I asked him, and he thought about it for a second.

"I think she meant not chasing after, but holding onto and not wanting to see the truth is what she meant." He said. I stared at him.

"How do you know that?" I asked him, and he blushed.

"I like to analyze things." He told me, and I nodded.

We talked for a while longer before it was time to go. I said goodbye to Tyler and headed to the office to claim my paycheck. Several of my students greeted me, and I was really happy that I was teaching here. Plus I had noticed that Tyler's eyes were hazel blue-green, not just blue.

On Saturday night, David came over and he took me to dinner. We seemed more distant then usual, but I think that was because we hadn't seen each other in a long time.

"Guess what?" David said, and I looked up at him

"I made head boy." He said, and I frowned.

"Why are you just telling me this now? Why didn't you tell me last weekend?" I asked him.

He shrugged. I frowned again, and I went back to my food. It irritated me that David hadn't told me that he was head boy. That would mean that we would share the same common room, and that he would have much less free time.

When David took me home that night, he pulled me into the shadows by my house, and we continued to make out a bit. It felt like old times, like we were back to normal.

"I think about you every second I'm not around you." He whispered into my ear, and he continued to kiss me.

After awhile, I knew it was time for me to go in, especially when he had his hand in my shirt.

"David, I have to go." I whispered into his ear, and he took his hand away, and kissed me one more time.

"Love you." He said, and I told him I loved him too. Then I went into the house, wondering why we were so distant at dinner.

The following morning, Tess, Tyler, Tucker, Matt and Kelsey came over. David couldn't come because he had "stuff to do". Matt told me later that he was getting all his homework done early.

Matt and Tyler both were of age, so they could do magic. We amused ourselves by bewitching bugs to follow my sister around, but eventually that got boring, and Matt conjured up a bottle.

"Want to play spin the bottle?" he said, grinning at us. Tess laughed, and so did Tucker, but Me, Tyler and Kelsey all stared at him blankly.

"It's a muggle game. You spin the bottle, and whomever it lands on you have to kiss. If you get somebody of the same sex, you go again. Who ever had to be the one kissed gets to spin next." He told us, still grinning.

I shrugged, and nodded; so did everybody else. We sat in a circle, boy-girl, and each took our turn at the bottle. It was really funny. Tess had to kiss Matt and Matt had to kiss Kelsey. Then Kelsey had to kiss Tucker and Tucker kissed me. I spun it, and it landed on Tyler.

I grinned at him, and leaned forward and kissed him on the lips. He kissed me back. We actually kissed for a second before we realized that we were still in a room full of people. We pulled apart, and I felt a little guilty. Everybody was staring at me.

"What?" I said, and they all went back to spinning the bottle.

I didn't feel guilty because I had kissed Tyler. I didn't think that playing a stupid game like that was cheating on David at all, since it was just a game. I felt guilty because I had liked kissing Tyler.

When everybody left, Tyler stuck around for a while. We were in the living room alone for a while, when he brought up the kiss.

"I know that you liked it." He told me seriously, and I nodded. I also knew that I didn't really like Tyler, I just liked his kissing.

Looking unsure of himself, he said, "Do you want to try it again, just to see if it was a one-time kiss or if we actually like kissing each other?" he asked. I noticed he left out the possibility of actually liking each other, because I didn't want to disappoint him.

I nodded, and he leaned forward and kissed me. I, of course, kissed him back. We didn't stop after a few seconds, but we continued to make out. I couldn't help noticing that he was a much better kisser then David. After several minutes, I forced myself to pull away.

"I think we definitely like kissing each other." I said, my voice higher pitched and shaky. Tyler nodded.

"You don't consider this cheating on David, do you?" he asked me.

"No, of course not." I said, not believing myself, because this is cheating on David, since it's not a game anymore.

"Good, I don't either." Tyler responded. I didn't believe him and he didn't believe me, and we didn't believe ourselves. Just as long as we were not believing together, nobody would find out about this.

A/N: Hmmm…Ten reviews, and a chapter next Wednesday again.


	23. Big Brother

_A/N: Thanks to my reviewers. And to all of you who were commenting on Lily and David: "Lily doesn't know the difference between real love and puppy love" Do you remember me saying that? It's kind of important. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. _

_Dedication: To everyone who has even clicked on my story. _

The whole week, I thought about what had happened between Tyler and me. I liked kissing him a lot more then kissing David, but I don't really like Tyler like that. I think. The whole kissing thing now had me questioning. I don't think he likes me like that though.

I forgot about the whole thing when I was teaching my class. Ayla was so much more bearable to be around that I actually liked her being my assistant. She was very easy-going when you were her friend.

Ayla liked to stay inside during lunch and have me teach her some more advanced spells. I had gotten special permission from Professor Boot to teach her more stuff, and she was delighted. That Friday, I took up the subject of me being blind again before we started practicing.

"How am I blind?" I asked her, and she shook her head.

"You still don't know. You will see it in time. I think that you are just starting to…" Ayla said, trailing off in thought.

"Can't you give me a better description then that?' I begged her, and she shook her head.

"Maybe later on in the summer I will tell you, but not now." She told me.

I didn't want to beg a twelve year old to tell me something, and that was the only thing that restrained me from doing so.

"What house are you in, anyway?" I asked her when we started practicing, having given up getting her to spill the beans.

"Ravenclaw, just like my brother." She said proudly.

Since she had been hanging around me, she talked an awful lot about her brother.

"What's your brother like?" I asked her.

"He's tall and cute." She answered, and I laughed.

"Except he likes this girl, and she doesn't know it. He doesn't know if she likes him or not." She told me, and I looked at her.

"If he is so cute, then why doesn't she know it? Why doesn't she like him?" I asked her, and she pondered this.

"Because she's taken by someone else." She said back.

"Oh, that really sucks. Tell your brother to come by sometime. I want to meet him." I told Ayla, curious about somebody who knew enough about defense against the dark arts to teach someone so well.

"Alright, I will." Said Ayla, and we went on with our lessons.

When I was done teaching and the class filed out into the courtyard to watch the show, I went outside for a walk. Then I saw Tyler, once again, coming towards me. I hadn't seen him since the previous week, when the little… okay, big kissing episode happened.

"Hi." I said, smiling at him, wondering if he was going to mention what happened. He didn't.

"What's up?" he asked, and I shrugged.

We chatted about random things for a while, and then David showed up.

"Hey Lily Flower." David said, coming over and sitting down next to me (we were sitting on a bench). He put his arm around me, and Tyler stiffened. I did to, though not as obvious.

There were a few minutes of awkward chitchat, and Tyler got up and left. David frowned at his retreating back.

"Why do you hang out with him anyway?" David asked, and I replied, "I thought you liked him!"

"I did, until I found out you kissed him." David retorted.

My heart stopped beating for a second. How could he have found out that we made out?

"I can't believe you agreed to play spin the bottle with him!" David exclaimed, and I let out the breath I was holding. My heart started to beat again. So Matt had told David about spin the bottle. So what? The two other couple played it. I told David this, and he just frowned.

"Come on, let's go." He said, and I got up and followed him.

"Where are we going?" I asked curiously, and David just shook his head, beckoning for me to follow. I did, and he took me to a car.

"You got your drivers license?" I said, grinning. David nodded. He had been taking classes in the muggle world for a while, and now he had a license to drive anywhere.

"Let's go to a movie." David said, and I nodded. Muggle movies were something that both he and I are hooked on. We love them. So David drove to the movie theatre and we went and bought tickets to see some chick-flick.

About half way through the movie, David leaned over and kissed me. We kissed for a while, but I couldn't help noticing how much I liked kissing Tyler more. We kissed some more, and I remembered how much I loved- love- David.

When the movie ended, David walked me to my house. It was a long walk, but we talked a lot, and I told him that I felt we were growing farther apart. He pulled me in front of him and looked at me.

"Lily, I know you think that we are growing apart, but we hardly get to see each other. On weekends, we see each other, but it's not the same. I miss spending time with you." David said, and I looked at my hands.

"I wanted to spend time with you last weekend, but you didn't want to." I told him, and David looked at his hands to.

"I know, and I'm sorry. How we make a plan to spend at least three nights a week together?" David asked, and I nodded. It would be nice to spend time with him again. As much as I liked kissing Tyler, being with David gave me a sense of comfort.

We resumed our walk, and I felt better about kissing Tyler then I had. David would never know, and it would never happen again.

The time flew by, and before I knew it the end of the summer was approaching. I hated to see the summer end, because I loved my class. They had all gotten so good at everything, Ayla was especially good. I still hadn't been able to meet her brother, and I really wanted to.

David and I went back to our normalness, no distantness between us. I saw everybody else a lot, and it had become a routine for Tyler to come and see me on Fridays after work. We hadn't mentioned anything about the kissing episode, and I was starting to forget about it.

"Now, tell me how I'm blind again." I asked Ayla on the last Friday of our workshop. It was a week until school started, but this was the last week of the workshop.

"You can't see what is right in front of you, and you go chasing after something else." Ayla said, and she wouldn't say anything else.

"Please? You said that you would tell me towards the end of the summer." I asked, and she laughed.

"I said maybe, and I thought that things would turn out differently." She said, laughing again.

"Fine. Tell me more about your brother. Did he get that girl yet?" I asked, accepting defeat and moving onto a new topic.

"Nope. He is hopelessly in love with her, but she doesn't know it because she it with another guy. It's so sad." Ayla said, and I answered, "When am I going to meet him?" I asked, still wanting to.

"You haven't yet? I thought you had… Today, I will make sure of it." Ayla replied, and I smiled. I was curious about him, and about what girl he liked. I wanted to meet someone so good at defense against the dark arts too.

After lunch, at the show, I was impressed at how good everybody was. I remembered the first show I watched and how good they all were. I sat for most of the show, until I say Ayla motion for me to come over to her. I figured it was time for me to meet her brother.

"Come on, he is over here to pick me up." Ayla told me once I got to her, and I followed her out of the courtyard to a bench.

We approached him from him behind, and I could see that he had black hair, like Ayla's. He looked really tall. And really familiar…

When he turned around, my eyes widened.

"Tyler?" I exclaimed.

He was Ayla's big brother, the one who taught her all of the Defense Against the Dark Arts stuff, the one who-Omigosh! The one who was in love with a girl who was with another guy, who didn't know it… It was all coming together; I should have known that he was Ayla's big brother… The countless times that I had seen him do DADA.

"You do know each other! Ty, you told me you hadn't met Lily." Ayla said, and Tyler looked embarrassed.

I looked at him for a long time, stricken that he liked me. Suddenly I knew how he had known what Ayla meant. He had probably said it himself. I still didn't understand what I was chasing after, but I was betting it had something to do with him liking me.

"You like me Tyler?" I asked carefully, still not sure how I was going to handle this.

"Ayla! What the hell did you tell her? I asked you to keep that a secret!" Tyler exclaimed, rounding on his little sister.

"She didn't tell me that, you just proved my suspicions by saying that right there." I told Tyler, and his face flushed.

"Why didn't you tell me? And you just blabbed to everyone what you think I should and shouldn't be doing?" I asked him softly.

"I didn't want to ruin the friendship, and I didn't blab." Tyler said softly,

I stared at them for a few seconds. I gave Ayla a hugged, telling her I would see her at Hogwarts.

"I'll see you around Tyler." I snapped, and I just turned around and walked away; I knew that Tyler wasn't finished with his side of the argument, but I didn't care.

Who did Tyler think he was? He just blabbed to everyone what he thought I was doing, and what I should be doing? He had no idea, no idea at all.

I walked for a while before I realized that I was heading in the wrong direction. David was taking me to dinner, and I was supposed to meet him so he could pick me up. Scowling, I turned around and walked in the other direction. David was waiting when I got there.

"Hey Lils, what up? Why do you look so sad?" David asked, and I shrugged.

"Girl problems." I said, really not wanting to get into detail about Tyler and that whole drama.

"No, tell me. I want to know." David asked, sounding sincere.

"Well, you see, my period-" I began, but David cut me off.

"Never mind. You don't have to share if you don't want to. Actually, I would prefer that you didn't." David said, and I laughed, my heavy mood lifting.

"I love you." I told David, and he smiled.

"I love you too, Lily."

The next day, Tyler sent me about a zillion letters, but I didn't read any of them, I just chucked them into the fire. I invited Tess over, and she listened to me as I told her what Tyler did and what I thought of him.

"Lily? Do you think that maybe you should just open one of the letters?" Tess asked hesitantly as I tossed the thirteenth letter into the fire.

"No." I said stubbornly, and Tess rolled her eyes.

I decided to spend the night at Tess's house, to get away from the letters. I love her house, because she is muggle-born, she has all of this strange stuff, like and oven and she has a miniature theater screen. It is so cool.

The next morning, I had to go home early because Tess was going to a muggle thing called church.

"On Saturday?" I asked groggily, and Tess nodded.

When I got down to my room after letting myself in, I found twenty-two letters on my bed, I chucked every single one of them into the fire.

_A/N: Come on, you guys, leave me some reviews! _


	24. Decisions

A/N: Thank you for the reviews 

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To the homecoming dance_

A few days before school started, I went to Diagon Alley to get my things. I walked around, saying hi to all of the people who I hadn't seen in a long time. I saw Tyler walking with Ayla. I hurried away, but not fast enough. Tyler spotted me.

"Hey, Lily!" He called, and I hurried in the opposite direction.

"Lily, wait! Just listen to me!" He called, and I kept going. I glanced back and saw that he wasn't following me, which made me happy. I wouldn't have to keep dodging him all day.

Around three, I met up with David.

"Ready to be head boy?" I asked him, and he grinned at me.

"You bet I am. I talked to your brother, and he told me all this cool stuff that head boys get to do." David told me, sounding absolutely ecstatic.

I smiled at him, but I couldn't help feel a little worried. We would see even less of each other when he becomes head boy, because then he has those duties to attend to, also.

We walked around for a while, each lost in our own thoughts. I was thinking about Tyler, wondering if it were fair that I was mad at him. I was mad at him because he was telling everybody that he thought that whatever I was chasing after was wrong. Or was I? Did I just not want to face what would happen if I liked Tyler and he liked me? I pondered this for a while, and then I pondered what I was chasing after or holding on to or whatever. I still was totally clueless, not that it mattered much.

When we were done shopping, I told David good-bye and wandered home. When I got there, I found my mum packing my things into a trunk.

"Hey, Lily." She said when she saw me, and I nodded. I was really tired; and really confused.

The next day, Tuesday, I had a lot to do. I was leaving the next day, which meant I had to get everything together. It took my much longer then I thought, so by the time I was done it was dinnertime. Since I had nothing better to do, I walked down to the muggle pizza parlor and got a slice of pizza. One thing about pizza is that I can only get it when I'm home, so I get it a lot. I hadn't gotten it all summer though.

After sitting down and ordering my food, a girl came up and sat next to me. She was pretty, with long blonde hair and pretty green eyes. Her eyes looked almost exactly like mine.

I stared at her for a few seconds. She was thin, and she looked about average height. Something about her was familiar.

"I'm Lily." I said, finally introducing myself. She looked at me for a second, then said, "I'm Claire." That name rang a bell, but I didn't know from where.

"You look really familiar." I said, still trying to place her.

"You to." Claire, said. I studied her, and finally, I remembered.

"Claire Dursley!" I said incredulously. I hadn't seen her since we were both very small children. There had been a reunion, and she was there.

"Lily Potter?" Claire exclaimed in the same voice. She hugged me and I hugged her. We had been really good friends then.

"I haven't seen you in ages! What happened?" I asked her. Claire looked at her hands.

"I go to this boarding school most of the year. You wont have heard of it, it's somewhere far away from here. Its call Beauxbaton Academy of M- Beauxbaton Academy." Claire said. I knew she had been about to say Beauxbaton Academy of Magic. So she was a witch.

I didn't know she was a witch, nor did she know I was one. The family reunion had been all muggles, and back then both her and me were regular kids.

"I know that place." I said, and just as I expected, she looked at me with an incredibly surprised look on her face.

"You do? How?" She said, suddenly suspicious.

"I go to Hogwarts." I told her, and her whole face lit up.

"Really? You're a muggleborn to?" She said, and I shook my head.

"Nope, my parents are both magical." I said, and she looked at me in surprise.

"My dad got so angry when he found out I was magical. He told me that I already had the Evens eyes from my grandmother's genes, but now I had my uncle's ability. I had no idea he meant Uncle Harry!" Claire exclaimed.

I laughed. My dad and Uncle Dudley hate each other more then anyone else. I could imagine my uncle when he found out his oldest daughter was a witch. He isn't really my uncle, but we pretend.

Claire and I chatted for a while. Claire has three younger sisters.

"Are any of them witches?" I asked, and Claire shook her head.

"Nope, I'm the only one." Claire said, and I grinned at her.

We chatted for a long time about stuff, and I finally walked home at like ten o'clock. Claire said that she would write to me, and I would write to her. I couldn't believe she was a witch!

When I got home, I did some last minute preparations to leave and collapsed into bed, ready to be back at school.

When morning came, it was a mad rush to get everything together. There was only four of us starting this year, but there was still a lot to do. I was the only one who actually seemed ready. I took my time eating breakfast and getting dressed, enjoying the chaos around me.

When we got to the platform, it was ten fifty five. I told my mother and father good bye, as did my siblings, and I went to find my friends. I found them all standing in a group. They were already on the train. Tess, Tucker, Kelsey and Tyler were all sitting in one compartment. I almost didn't go in, because Tyler was there, but at the last minute, I changed my mind. These people were my friends, too.

"Hey guys." I said, sliding into a seat, smiling at everyone except Tyler.

"Hey Lily." Everyone said back.

David joined us about halfway through the ride, for he had been in the head-boy's compartment. He sat next to me and put his arm around me, and I nestled into it. Tyler looked hurt when David did this, but I didn't care. Tyler was still a jerk.

Soon, we arrived at Hogwarts. I was so happy to be here. It took a few minutes for everybody to sit down, and then the new students filed in. There was only one of my cousins this year, John, Bill and Fleur's youngest son.

Soon, the feast was over, and Dumbledore stood up to make his speech.

"Welcome back, and Welcome to all of you! I have some important announcements to make. Of most importance, the Quiditch Cup will not be held this year." Dumbledore said, and whispers filled the great hall. I was furious, but I should have seen this coming. David would have been captain, but he didn't get a badge.

"Why not?" Some one called, as outraged as everyone else.

Dumbledore waited for us to quiet down before continuing, "This year, Beauxbatons will be hosting a Triwizard Tournament." Dumbledore told us, and this time it was quiet. A Triwizard tournament?

After he explained to everyone what the Triwizard Tournament was, he told us about what was happening.

"All Sixth and Seventh Years are allowed to enter, but those that are under age must get parental permission. The students who wish to enter shall accompany me to Beauxbatons on October Thirtieth. The chosen student will stay, and the students not chosen may go home, or stay if they wish. The rest of you will be transported there on the task days, but other then that you will remain here. Any questions?" Dumbledore said, and I grinned.

I was totally going to enter. My dad had been in it when he was a kid, and I wanted to do it now. I had to get my mom to say yes, but I was sure she would. She isn't the type to not say yes to something like that.

"Are you going to enter?" I whispered excitedly to Tess, who shook her head.

"No, to dangerous for me." Tess said, and I shook my head at her.

I asked everybody around me. Tucker was going to enter, but Kelsey wasn't. David said he wasn't going to enter, either, because he was head boy and his duties were here. Matt was entering though.

Now I was thinking twice about entering. If I did enter, I would be away from Tess and David for a long time.

That night, Sirius and I wrote a letter to mom asking permission. I was still not so sure about entering. I wanted permission, just in case I decided that I was going to do it.

Everywhere was buzzing about the Triwizard tournament. The winner got a thousand galleons and didn't have to take exams… I wanted to enter the tournament, but I didn't want to be away from my boyfriend or my best friend for such a long time.

My new classes were really hard, much harder then last year. Just as I had suspected, we were learning non-verbal spells. Luckily, I wasn't partnered with Tyler like the year before. That didn't start until winter term. I was glad, because Tyler kept on trying to talk to me.

The time was flying by. I didn't have much time to see David, but I didn't have much time to see anyone. I was always studying, sleeping, eating, or studying some more. My mom had given me and Sirius permission to enter. I was glad that Sirius was entering. I had decided to enter.

In the middle of September, Tyler managed to corner me.  
"We need to talk." He said, and I glared at him.

"Why are you mad at me?" He asked, and I couldn't remember why I was mad.

"I didn't go around blabbing, you know, about what I think you should do. Ayla picked up my Journal, where I had written it. You can go ask her if you don't believe me." He said, and I felt bad. I had been mad at him for no reason. But still…

"I don't like you like that, you know that, right?" I told Tyler, and the second I said I knew it was true. Tyler may be a really good kisser, but he is nothing more then a friend. He looked a little hurt, but he nodded.

"I knew that. I knew that from the way you reacted." Tyler said.

"Are you going to enter?" I asked Tyler, and he shook his head.

"Nope. This is my last year, and I want to do good. Seventh Years still have to

Take N.E.W.T.'s if they are in the tournament or not." Tyler said, and I shrugged.

"I have to go. I'll talk to you later…" I said, and after some hesitation, I gave Tyler a hug. He hugged me back.

I was planning on entering, but if I didn't make it I was going to stay. So, I was making the most of my time with my friends. I still studied, and at Beauxbatons, the Hogwarts students would take classes with the Beauxbaton Students, so I still had to keep up with my work.

At the end of September, there was a list up in the great hall, and if you were going to enter, you had to sign your name. There was a list of five names. I pulled out a quill and signed it before I could change my mind.

_A/N: Ten Reviews, and I will give you a chapter next Saturday. Please review; I haven't gotten very many for the last two chapters. _


	25. Beauxbatons

_A/N: Okay, thank-you for the reviews. And for this story, I don't speak French; so the characters will speak in English and the things that would normally be in French will be in English. Oh, and about Claire getting her grandmothers genes for eyes. Petunia had the green eyes gene in her, even though she didn't have the green eyes. _

_Disclaimer: You know what I'm going to say._

_Dedication: To Chris. And to Josh. _

I walked around my dorm one last time. I was going to miss it. I was leaving in a few hours to go with Dumbledore to Beauxbatons Academy….

"I'm going to miss you." Kelsey said wistfully. I hugged her, and made my way down stairs to say good-bye to everyone else. The time between now and me writing my name down on that list had flown by. October thirtieth was here, and soon I was leaving all of my friends behind…

When I got downstairs, Tucker, Tess, Remus and Lily were waiting to say good-bye to me. Tucker had decided not to enter after all. I gave them all hugs, and I gave Tess an extra long hug.

"You wont forget about me, will you?" Tess whispered into my ear.

"No. Of course not. How could I forget my very best friend?" I whispered back, and Tess smiled.

"Good-Bye!" I called to the people in the common room. They all said good-bye. I made my way out of the common room for the last time for almost a year. I made my way to David's room to make my last good-bye. I had said good-bye to Tyler earlier that day.

"Hey Lily…" David said when he saw me, and I smiled sadly. I only had maybe twenty minutes before I had to be down in the great hall, so that left ten minutes for a good-bye.

"I'm going to miss you, Lils." David said, giving me a big hug.

"I'm not even going to get to see you on your birthday." David whispered into my ear.

It took me a second to realize that my birthday was the next day. I had forgotten about it. I hoped that my parents hadn't.

After a little bit of kissing and one last hug, I said my final good-bye and made my way to the great hall.

Dumbledore was there, along with about fifteen kids. I recognized a few Gryffendors. Matt was there, along with Sirius. I did a count, and there were only three girls. Three girls and thirteen boys. That was a lot of boys. I was the only girl from Gryffendor. One of the girl's was a Slytherin sixth year with a rat face; the other was a seventh year Hufflepuff.

"Okay, now that you all are here, let me say a few things. Beauxbatons is rather far, so it will take us a few hours to get there. When we do, we will have a feast, then we will show you all the… well, you'll see. Anyway, then you shall go and bunk according to your year and what table you sit at." Dumbledore said, and we all nodded.

"Alright, let's go." Dumbledore said, and we all stood up. We followed him out of the great hall to the entrance hall, then outside. When I saw what was waiting for us, I gasped, along with everyone around me. There was a very large House. It's about the size of my house back home, but it was odd seeing it in the middle of the Hogwarts grounds.

"We will be traveling in this, I hope it is comfortable for you. It is invisible to muggles, in case you were worrying. Please, shuffle in." Dumbledore said cheerfully, and we all went in, still in slight shock.

Once we were inside, I settled myself in an armchair and read a book I had brought with me. I could help missing my friends already. The fact that I wouldn't see them for a while was hard on me. I was planning on staying at Beauxbatons, as much I would miss my friends. I wanted to experience another magic school.

Eventually, I fell asleep. I woke up when I felt the house descending and I fell off my chair. I hopped up and looked out of one of the windows. We were descending toward a large castle. It looked like an iced castle, because, from what I could see, it was silver. I ran my fingers through my hair, suddenly nervous. I shuffled to the front of the house, where Dumbledore was calling for everybody to come.

I was shaking slightly. I was afraid of what all of these people would say about me. Claire was there, and she had said she would look for me. But still, there would be all these people out there… would they laugh at me.

Sirius came up next to me and put his arm around my shoulder.

"Come on Lily, it's okay." Sirius whispered to me, and I stopped shaking. I knew that I was being silly about being scared, but I couldn't help it. I was still nervous when the door in front of us opened and we shuffled into the cold.

I gazed at everyone. They were all very fair skinned. It was cold, and I pulled my cloak around me. All of the people gazed back at us. I figured the other school hadn't arrived yet. I found Claire in the crowd. I smiled at her, and she smiled back.

"Velcome to Beauxbatons." A voice said, and I looked to where it had come from. There was a Giant Lady standing there. She looked old; her hair was flecked with gray streaks. She was the size of Hagrid, the teacher of Care of Magical Creatures. I suppose that I was used to Hagrid, so this Lady seemed huge.

"Ahhh, Madam Maxime. How lovely it is to see you." Dumbledore said, bowing to her. She smiled, returning the greeting.

All of the Hogwarts students shuffled to the side to await the arrival of the other school. I could hear murmurings in the crowd, and I realized that the school was called Durmstrang.

We waited for maybe five minutes when there was a distant rumble. We all looked to the sky, and there was a very large ship coming towards us. My dad had told me that one of the schools arrived by ship, through the lake at Hogwarts. Glancing around, I noticed there was no lake, so they flew here.

When the ship landed, an ugly man got out. He was short, maybe five and a half feet tall, with black hair flecked heavily with gray.

"Hello." He said in a deep voice, but you could tell he was concealing a scrawny one.

"Ah, hello Craycroft!" Dumbledore said merrily. I looked at the man, finding it hard to believe that this man was the headmaster. Soon, though, his students filed out behind him, almost every one of them taller then him.

We shuffled inside for the feast. I was very glad to go inside, for I was very cold. The inside of Beauxbatons castle was magnificent. It was gleaming, with statues of ivory and marble staircases everywhere.

We were led into a dining hall. Looking out, I could see it was very much like Hogwarts, with a few changes. There was the staff table, where the teachers were now sitting. In front of it, there were only three tables, each with a banner over it. One had a blue banner, one had a silver banner, and one had a gold banner. Those were the colors of the houses, I figured.

"Oy! Lily? Come sit over here!" I heard my name and turned to my left. Claire was sitting with a group of girls, and I hurried over to sit with them. They were under the gold banner.

"Your castle is magnificent." I said, a little breathless. This was a lot to take in.

The girls laughed at me, but in a good way. I looked around at Claire's friends. They all looked nice.

"This is Nicole, Anne, Jeanne, Ella, Krista, and Carina." Claire said, introducing them each in turn. I said hi to all of them, and they said hi back.

"What houses are there?" I asked Claire curiously.

"This house is Trellena, the blue is Stristen, and the silver is Lunesta." Claire said, and I smiled.

"Those are pretty names. What do they mean?" I asked curiously. Claire shrugged.

"They don't tell us. They don't tell us until seventh year." She told me, and I wondered why.

The food was delicious. It was al French food, and much of It I hadn't tasted before. There was a lot of chicken, and a lot of mushrooms. It was all good though.

When we were done, Madam Maxime and Dumbledore came forward. They were holding a small chest between them. They set it up on a table, and Dumbledore opened it and pulled out a roughly carved wooden goblet. It would have been something in a junk shop if it hadn't been full of blue-white flames.

"Is that the judge?" I whispered incredulously to Claire. She shrugged; she was just as clueless as I.

"This is the Goblet of Fire. You all have twenty-four hours to put a slip of paper in it, with you name and school written clearly on it. Madam Maxime shall draw a line around it, so anyone who is underage or does not have permission may not enter. By putting your name, you are binding a magical contract. Good luck to all of you!" Dumbledore told the hall.

We all started buzzing. I couldn't wait to go forward and put my name in. After all, this was what I was here for.

That night, I found out I was sleeping in the Trellena dorm. Claire took me up there. When I went in, I couldn't help feeling like I had walked into a palace. All of the walls were painted light gold, and the bed hangings were gold, the sheets were gold, almost everything was gold.

"Like it?" Nicole said, and I grinned. There was an empty bed at the end, and Claire told me that it was mine. I went to it; pleased to see my trunk was already there.

"Are you guys entering?" I asked them. Claire, Krista, Carina and Nicole were entering. The other three weren't, but all for different reasons.

"My mom said no." Anne said, scowling.

"I'm not a good enough wizard." Jeanne said sadly.

"I'm way to scared." Ella said, shuddering.

The next morning, my birthday, was Saturday, My birthday. I got up early. I was sixteen. In the summer, I could get my license… I walked downstairs, wondering if I would get any presents. I went to the entrance hall to put my name in the goblet. I didn't know my way around, so finally, after wandering for a long time, I asked a boy.

"It's down the hall and to the left, then the right." The boy said, flashing me a smile. I felt myself blushing.

"Here, I'll walk you there." He said, and he did.

About halfway there, he said, "I'm Christopher." "I'm Lily." I replied.

"What house are you sleeping in? I'm in Trellena." He said, and I smiled.

"So am I." I replied. Christopher smiled, obviously pleased.

"Are you in your sixth year, or seventh? I'm a sixth year. I'm entering the tournament now, and I'm guessing you are to." He said, glancing at the paper in my hand.

Laughing I nodded. "Yep, I'm a sixth year to. And yes, I'm entering." I told him.

We made our way to the dining hall, and I placed my name in the goblet. Christopher did soon after me.

"Come on, I'll walk you back to the common room." He said, and I followed.

"Today's my birthday." I told him, and he smiled.

It was a lot quicker to get back to the common room then I thought, maybe because I had a guide. When I got to the staircase to go up to my dorm, he held his arms out.

"You get a birthday hug." He said, and I gave him a hug.

"Happy birthday Lily." He said, and I walked up the stairs.

"Bye Christopher." I called down the stairs.

"You can call my Chris. All my friends do." Christopher called back up the stairs.

When I got to my room, I collapsed onto my bed. Nobody else was up yet. Chris considered me a friend. That was a very good birthday present. Chris was very cute… David was the farthest thing from my mind.

_A/N: Review!_


	26. The Triwizard Champions

_A/N: Thank-you for the reviews._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter_

_Dedication: To everybody._

I ended up falling back asleep. When I woke up, there was a small pile of presents on the foot of my bed. Glancing at the clock at my bedside table, I saw it was nine. I had been up early. Nobody else was in here now, I guess that they all had gotten up and ditched me.

I went downstairs after I had opened my presents. Nobody had forgotten my birthday this year, and I was glad. Really glad. When I got downstairs, everybody was sitting in the Trellena common room. There was all the girls, plus quite a few boys as well. I smiled at them all, pleased to see that Sirius was among them.

"Happy Birthday Lily." He called, and I smiled and wished him happy birthday was well.

"It's your birthday?" Carina exclaimed, and all of the girls jumped up and gave me a hug. I laughed.

We all made our way down to the dining hall. I was glad I was with all of them, because this time I didn't get lost. While we walked, Claire explained to me that most of the time, the seven Trellena girls would hang out with the seven Trellena boys.

"With you and your brother, the numbers will still be even." Claire said happily, and I couldn't help laughing.

When all of us reached the hall, Chris came over and sat next to me. I noticed that here, you sat with your year, but everybody knew and liked everybody. I thought that was kind of strange.

Claire squeezed my hand. "Tonight they are going to pick!" She said, getting all excited. I laughed and glanced at Chris on my other side. He smiled at me. I blushed and looked away.

When we were done eating breakfast, Claire and the girls and all the boys wanted to show me around the grounds, Sirius to. I couldn't help noticing that Sirius and Ella kept staring at each other and smiling. I could tell that Sirius liked Ella, and Ella definitely liked Sirius. Ella has long brown hair and brown eyes… Normally my brother would call a girl who looked like that "plain", but now it looked like he didn't care.

We all walked around for a while. Eventually, We all fell into pairs of people. I was beginning to see that there were a few couples in the group. The un-coupled people walked with other un-coupled people. I ended up walking with Chris.

"So how has your birthday been so far?" He asked, flashing me a dazzling smile.

"It's been good. Especially since I met you." I said, and I blushed. I hadn't meant to say the last part, it had just slipped out. I looked away, out across the Beauxbatons grounds, waiting for my red cheeks to go away.

"I like you to." Chris said, and he slipped his hand into mine.

I stopped, and turned to face him. I had to tell him about David. I took a deep breath, which was not a good idea. Chris smelled really good.

"Listen Chris, I really like you and all, really, I do. But I have a boyfriend back home, and I don't want to hurt him. Can we be just friends?" I asked him, and he nodded, looking glum.

I felt really bad, because I really liked Chris… It was just I liked David to, and I was already committed to David… I wasn't going to do what I did with Tyler.

We walked around for a little while longer, but eventually we went inside. We fell back into groups of boys and girls. I told Claire about Chris. When I was done, she looked at me sharply.

"Do you know what happened to him at the end of last year?" She said sharply, and I shook my head.

"He went out with a girl from Stristen for a year. He thought everything was going great, but then she up and breaks up with him out of the blue. He was crushed, devastated. He hardly did anything this summer. Then, the new term starts. There is his ex, wrapped around another guy and making out so ferociously with a guy that you would think they would never have the chance again. He was starting to get back on track, you know, forget about her, then you come along. Do you know how much it must have took him to try and hold your hand, to admit that he liked you?" Claire said, shaking her head.

I gaped at her. It was a lot to take in. I had no idea that all of that had happened with Chris.

"You think I should have cheated on my own boyfriend so Chris could be happy?" I said, getting defensive.

Claire shook her head, saying "No, not at all. I just meant that you should know about his past, meaning that if he told you he liked you, he must really like you." Claire finished.

I looked at my hands. I felt even worse then before. I looked at my hands, feeling really bad.

"I didn't mean to make you feel bad. It's just that everyone is really protective of Chris after what happened. We don't want anything else bad to happen to him." Claire said.

That night, I was shaking with excitement. We were going to find out who was the school champions would be. I was so excited that I could hardly eat any dinner. Chris was looking slightly sullen, but he didn't look too much different then when he had earlier.

When everyone finally finished their dinner, Madam Maxime stood up, holding the goblet of fire. The hall quieted at once.

"Here it goes!" Madam Maxime said, and the goblet belched out a piece of paper.

"The Durmstrang Champion is…" She paused for effect.

"Erik Yugoff!" She said, and a tall boy with hooded eyes and dark hair stood up and walked to the room behind Madam Maxime.

"The 'Ogwarts Champion is… Lily Potter!" She shouted.

I didn't comprehend at first that it was me. I mean, sure, I heard my name, but I forgot for a second that I was Lily Potter. Ella cave me a punch on the shoulder that drew my back to attention. I stood up shakily and made my way to the room also. The last thing I heard before the door shut was, "The Beauxbaton Champion is…"

I glanced around the room I was in. The boy, Erik was in here. I thought that he looked strange and moody. I waited to see who the champion from Beauxbatons was. The door opened, and I saw my cousin silhouetted in the doorway.

"Claire!" I said hoarsely. This was a nightmare. I couldn't compete against my cousin. That was to mean. But I suppose I don't have a choice.

"Can you believe it? We are both champions!" Claire said, giggling. She sat next to me. She clearly did not think that it was going to be a problem.

We sat there for a minute or two before Madam Maxime, Professor Dumbledore and Craycroft shuffled in, followed by a few people that I didn't recognize. Dumbledore smiled at me, but I think he was smiling at everyone.

"You have all been chosen as Triwizard Champions; congratulations. The first task will take place on November the Twenty-sixth at two o'clock. You will all be excused from classes that day. Good Luck!" Said one of the men I didn't know, and the two of them left.

"Please, go up to your dormitories. You will receive a bit more information about the first task shortly; for now, enjoy it." Dumbledore said, and with a wave of his hand a door opened behind us, and we understood we were to shuffle through it.

Claire and I shuffled through the door and made our way back up to the common room. Just before we reached the entrance, Claire stopped and looked at me.

"Let's make a pact, okay? That we will not fight about the tournament." She said, looking solemn. I nodded.

"That's a good idea." I said, and we hugged.

I was really glad that we had made that quick pact, because now I didn't have to worry about me and her fighting. As we entered the common room, we were met by a ton of screams and cheers. Most of it was for Claire, because they didn't know me, but I saw a few people cheering my name also.

The screams and celebrations went on for quite sometime, until the head of the house came in and told us we must all go to bed, for there was lessons the next day. So, I skipped upstairs with Claire and the rest of the girls, gossiping happily about how we were going to do and what was going to happen.

When I lay down in bed, that's when it all really hit me. I was in the Triwizard tournament. People die in the Triwizard tournament. The last time, Voldemort had killed a boy by the name of Cedric Diggory. I shuddered, remembering the story my dad had told me. I remember the look in my dad's eyes when he told me about the graveyard… About how he had seen Cedric killed and many others tortured… I shook my head back and forth, trying to red myself of the memory. I was not going to a graveyard, and I was not going to die. Period.

When I woke up the next morning, a feeling of mixed excitement and dread loomed over me. Sometime today, we were supposed to be receiving the information for the first task, and I was scared silly. What in the world would it be, and would it be good or bad?

As I walked to my first class, that morning, Chris caught up with me. Claire and Ella, who seemed to be a pair of best friends in the group, glanced at each other and sped up a bit, leaving the two of us alone.

"I hear that Claire told you about my past…" He said softly, and I nodded.

"Listen, I know that you are taken right now, but if you ever break up with him, give me a chance, okay? Because you're a pretty cool girl, and I barely know you… I want to get to know you a lot better." Chris said softly. I smiled at him, and nodded. Then we hugged, showing that we could still be friends.

As I got settled down into my first class, potions, I thought curiously about what he had just said. The thought of breaking up with David had actually never occurred to me, but now it was. I had thought that I was so in love with David, but now it is so obvious that I am not… Had I spent all that time wallowing for him, defending him, just to find out that I don't like him after all? All that time that I had pined for him… Had it been just a waste of time?

A voice came back to me. I had heard Tess telling David something once back when I was… depressed. _She doesn't know the difference between real love and puppy love…_I remember Tess saying that and me thinking that she was crazy, but maybe she wasn't so crazy after all. Maybe David was just puppy love.

My mind was whirring my whole potions lesson, the first task and the lesson forgotten. Break up with David, stay with David, which one? It wasn't that I didn't still like David; it was just that I had noticed that I didn't remotely miss him either. I couldn't help but wonder if I hadn't gotten back with David after I had made my jump off the Astronomy Tower, would things be different?

_A/N: Kind of a choppy chapter, but it's up. Sorry it took so long. Review!_


	27. My Swirling Mind

_A/N: Thank you for the reviews._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To my piggy. Hehe._

I hardly paid attention in class all day. My mind switched from Chris to David to the first task. When the classes finally ended and I made my way back up to the dormitory that day, I was amazingly confused.

Claire could tell that something was bothering me. She came up to me and asked me what was wrong. I just shook my head at her. "Don't worry about it." I said, and Claire shrugged.

"So, what do you think is coming for the first task?" She asked curiously. I shrugged. I truly had no idea, and I knew that soon we would be getting a clue soon… I was curious as to when we would be getting it. I hoped that it would be soon, because I needed to figure out what to do.

When all of us got back to our dorms, I got my wish. There was a package sitting on my bed, and one on Claire's. I grabbed mine, and I noticed a letter flutter to she ground and under my bed. Not bothering to pick it up yet, I ripped open the package. Inside was an ordinary mirror.

I looked into it, expecting to see my own reflection. Instead, I saw a whole bunch of animals running around. Looking closer, I recognized almost all of them as creatures that I had studied in Care of magical creatures. They were all dangerous to humans, so we only read about them, and a few of them the teacher handled. Now I was afraid that we might be doing something with them.

I continued to gaze into the mirror. Soon, the animals disappeared, and there something hanging from above whatever was below. Watching it, I noticed that spells were being fired at it, and they were being deflected.

I glanced at Claire, who was still staring intently at her mirror. She looked up at me, looking completely puzzled.

"Do you have any idea of what we are supposed to do?" She asked, and I shook my head. I had absolutely no idea what to do now that I had this bit of information. All of the other girls were watching the two of us intently. I handed mine to Carina, who took it with interest. She, along with three of the other girls, watched the mirror intently. The remaining girls gathered around Claire's mirror.

"What do you think it means?" I asked curiously, and they all shrugged. They had no idea, and, unfortunately, neither did I.

"Let's go to dinner and think about this." Claire said, and I followed her downstairs.

We walked to the dining hall, and my thoughts once again turned to Chris and David. Then, I thought about Chris's past. His past was nothing compared to mine. I had been dumped by the on I loved, raped, then depressed, and made a suicide attempt. None of the people here, except Sirius, knew about any of that stuff. It made Chris's past seem almost normal.

I thought about David then. He had been some how connected with all but one of those things. Maybe he was the reason that my past was so horrible… I had no idea what would have happened if I never was with David in the first place, but I don't know… Maybe things would have turned out worse, because David was the one who rescued my from the snow after I had jumped… But then again he was the whole reason I jumped in the first place…

By the time we got to the dining hall, my head was swirling with so much information that I couldn't keep my thoughts straight. My mind slipped from David to Chris to the first task. I wanted badly to just wake up and have all my problems solved, but I knew that was not about to happen.

When I sat down, Chris turned and smiled at me. I felt my heart go flutter, and danger signs flashed in my head. I knew that I was falling for Chris, and falling fast. I couldn't let that happen. I would not let myself cheat on David. Again.

The time flew by, and before I knew it, it was the Monday before the first task. I couldn't believe it when Claire told me. My mind had been so full lately, that I hadn't paid attention to anything, let alone the time.

I had made a decision on David and Chris, and I was wondering if I would regret it when I made that decision… I had really no idea until it happened, but I was terrified that I would make the wrong decision and basically screw up the rest of my life.

I really didn't have any idea what I was going to do about the first task… A week ago, we had a wand weighing, and they had given us a little more information about the first task. We should be very prepared, and have good defense. I had been practicing my best defense spells, and a few offensive ones to, but that was about all I have done to prepare for the first task.

As the end of the week and the task grew closer, I became more and more nervous. Not only was the first task coming, I would get to see Tess and David and Tyler and everyone who I had missed and left at home. I wondered if I would seem any different to them… Sirius said that my voice has changed, like the accent had changed.

I was worried that I might seem stuck up to them now, because I have a whole new set of friends. Maybe they would think that I didn't need them anymore.

By Thursday night, I was in a panic. I was afraid, yet excited. I wanted to see my friends so bad the next day, but I was worried about how they would act after not seeing them for almost a month. I was especially afraid of seeing David.

The task also had me very preoccupied, but I was more worried about my friends. Claire and everyone could tell that more then the task was bothering me, so they kept asking me if I was okay.

"I'm fine!" I said impatiently, when Jeanne asked me if I was okay. She looked kind of hurt that I had said it like that. I felt my scowl soften.

"I'm sorry… It's just m really worried about some stuff and what I am going to do…" I said softly, and Claire looked over at me.

"Want to talk about it?" Claire said softly, and I shook my head. These people wouldn't really know what to do.

When I climbed into bed a little later, I knew that I would not be able to sleep. My swirling mind was so full that I would never be able to sleep. It had been full the past nights, but now my mind was in overdrive.

I lay there until sometime around three, when I finally drifted to sleep. I had dreams about mirrors, David, Chris and Tess.

When I woke up Friday morning, it was late. I looked at the clock by my bed, which read eleven o'clock. I jumped up to get ready, but then I remembered that the champions didn't have to go the classes today.

I did get up anyways and get dressed. I made my way downstairs, where I noticed Claire sitting. She looked up at me and smiled.

"Hey sleepyhead." She said, and I laughed softly.

"Do you know when the Hogwarts students who are coming to watch the task are coming?" I asked her, and she nodded.

"They are arriving at lunch time, and they are all spending the night and leaving either tomorrow or Sunday morning." Claire said.

"Yes!" I shouted. I had no idea that they were going to stay for the weekend. I had thought that they were only coming for the task and then leaving. I was incredibly happy that they were actually going to stay for a while.

I glanced at my watch. It was eleven thirty, which meant that they were coming in half an hour.

"We are supposed to go down to the Quiditch pitch in fifteen minutes. We will have lunch there, and then we will be given instructions and get ready to go." Claire said, and I frowned. I had wanted to see my friends before we had to go to on, but oh well. I was just glad that I would get to see them at all.

Fifteen minutes later, Clair and I made out way down to the pitch. Actually, I followed her down to the pitch, since I have no idea how to get there myself. It took longer then I thought to get there. Their castle was a lot larger then Hogwarts, and it was more complicated.

Once we got the pitch and figured out where to go, it was noon. When the two of us got to the room off the pitch where we were supposed to be, both Claire and I were surprised.

"Mom! Dad!" I cried, and I ran to them. They were here. I hugged my dad extra tight, and then I hugged my mom. When I hugged my mom, I noticed that there was a large bulge at her stomach… I looked down.

'Your pregnant!" I exclaimed. My mom nodded, her face glowing.

"But you're…you're… why?" I asked. I almost told my mom that she was old, but I didn't.

"We didn't mean for it to happen… it just did." My mom said, and I realized why the baby had happened. I didn't want to think of my parents going at it. That was just disgusting.

"When is it due?" I asked.

"_She_ is due in February." My mom said, and I squealed.

"It's a girl?" I asked, excited. If it were a girl, which would mean that it would even out the numbers… there would be the same amount of boys as girls.

My mom nodded, and I squealed again. I glanced at my dad, to se his expression, but he was staring off in the distance.

I followed his stare to Claire and her parents. Claire was talking to her father, a very large man. I don't remember him from when I was a kid. I remember that he never came to family reunions. Then I remembered that Claire was muggle-born, so her parents were muggles. I remembered my aunt Jane, I knew that was she, so the man next to her must be my uncle…

"Hello Dudley." My dad said softly, and my uncle glanced over at me, then my dad. His eyes narrowed.

"Harry." He said, glaring at my dad.

"Do they still call you Dinky Didums?" My dad asked, apparently mocking my Uncle.

"Harry!" My mother whispered next to him.

Uncle Dudley said nothing back, he just glared at Harry.

"Sorry Gin, I just couldn't resist." My dad whispered back, and I burst out laughing. My mom and Dad sounded just like a couple of kids. My eyes met Claire's, and she started to laugh to, which made me laugh harder, which made her laugh harder and so on. My mom started laughing to, and then my dad, then my Aunt Jane, and finally my Uncle Dudley smiled, then laughed.

"Hmmm… I wonder what everyone is laughing at… Me perhaps?" I heard someone say, and everyone fell silent at once. Dumbledore and the other two heads had entered the room.

"Okay, now that you three have had your family reunion, I have an announcement. Each of you will choose something out of this bag, which will tell you which order you go in. Your job is to get to the box hanging in the air and to retrieve it using magic." Dumbledore told us, and the three of us nodded.

He held out the bag to the boy first, who put his hand in and pulled something out. He looked at it and nodded. Next, he held the bag out to Claire, who also took one. Now it was my turn. I put my hand in the bag and pulled out whatever was in there.

_A/N: Twelve reviews, and I will update by next Friday._


	28. The First Task

A/N: Hey, thank you to the reviewers. I'm sorry I haven't updated in such a long, I'm sorry, but I've been really preoccupied.

_Disclaimer: sigh Once again, I do not own Harry Potter._

_Dedication: To my friend Josh… who is there even when I'm having one of my really moody days that comes along with being a girl…_

My hand was shaking as I pulled out the object. When it came out, I looked at it curiously. It was a small mirror, and when I gazed into it, a bright number one lit it up. I swallowed. I knew that I was going to be the first to go.

"What do the mirrors mean?" I asked, my throat dry.

"They are your hint." Dumbledore replied mysteriously.

"Lily, I see that you have number one. Please follow me. Families, you my follow my friend here to the stands. The other two champions can wait here until called." Dumbledore said cheerfully. My stomach was clenched so bad that I could barely breath. I followed Dumbledore out of the tent and into the arena.

I heard someone shouting my name, saying that I was the first champion to go on. I looked up into the crowd, and I saw David, Kelsey, Matt, Tyler, Tucker, but I didn't see Tess anywhere. I felt kind of sad that my best friend wasn't there to support me… There was some new girl in the group though. She had chin length black hair; she was really pale, and a lot of dark make-up and clothes. I was curious to who she was, but I didn't have time to ponder that.

Looking back down, I studied where I was. It seemed like a normal arena. It wasn't huge, but it was pretty big. There really was nothing around me. I looked around for a few seconds, wondering if I wasn't supposed to come out yet, when BOOM! A flash of light exploded, so I couldn't see, and when I opened my eyes, all I could see were mirrors. I looked left and right, up and down, but all I could see was my reflection.

I walked around a bit. It was hard to figure out what I was doing, since I really had no since of direction. I walked forward, and I saw something that made my heart stop.

A giant snake was racing toward me. I didn't know from which direction, because of all the mirrors. It kept getting closer and closer. I was panicking really badly now. Glancing around, I spotted a small area where I couldn't see my reflection. I darted through it, and soon I was in another mirrored room. This time there were several hundred snakes slithering around in there. I screamed, for snakes are my worst fear.

It took me a few minutes to figure out that maybe I should do something, rather then stare at them until they attack me. I had no idea what to do. I could stun them all, but that would take far to long. I could shrink them all, which would be quicker… Then I remembered my defense against the dark arts OWL. We had to reduce a hundred mice to one single mouse. It was supposed to be good for getting rid of weak wizards, if you're strong enough.

Gathering up my strength, a looked at the snakes and bellowed "Disapuno!"

The instants the spell hit the snakes, they started disappearing one by one, until soon there was only one snake left. The only problem was that I wasn't very good at the spell yet, so the new one was a lot bigger then the old ones that it replaced.

I gulped and looked at the new snake with fearful eyes. It was eyeing me.

Without thinking, I bellowed, "Impedia!" It was immobilized for a second, and I ran by it. I was in such a hurry to keep going that I ran into a mirror and rebounded back towards the snake. I had immobilized the snake with its mouth open, so when I put my hand out to break my fall, the fang seared through it.

I bit my lip, wrenched my hand out, and hurried on. My hand was bleeding, and it was hurting horrible, but I kept going. I ran through halls and halls of mirrors, facing a few more monsters on the way, although the new ones were a lot less challenging then the snakes. Soon, I was running down a long corridor made up entirely of mirrors. I kept running, and soon I entered what I guessed to be the final room.

I ran into it and glanced around. There were more mirrors, but as I looked up, there was a small box, maybe a square foot, hanging from a robe very high up. There were more mirrors around it. I remembered that I had to retrieve the box, so I shot a spell at it, thinking that it would just fall. It didn't.

I tried to remember what I had learned previously, about things like this. I thought for a second when it came to me. I wasn't supposed to be trying to get it down by some sort of special spell, I was to rebound it off the mirrors and get it down from the top. It wasn't skills; it was logic.

Carefully aiming at the mirror, I used the reducter curse. I aimed wrong, though, and it went rebounding off in completely the wrong direction. I scowled, partly because I knew this had the potential to take me forever, and because for every time I missed, I was getting points taken off.

I aimed again, this time my aim was true. The reducter curse went and hit the rope, and the box fell. I grinned and picked it up with my uninjured hand. Another door opened at the opposite side that I had come in, and I hurried through it. I was hoping so bad that I wasn't about to go into another room.

When I walked out the door, I was greeted by cheers. I blinked in the light; I was out in the arena again, the mirrors were gone. I was holding the box, and my hand was hurting so bad that I could hardly think straight, but as soon as I heard those cheers, my mind went blank. I grinned at the crowd, and they cheered louder.

"Ms. Potter retrieved her chest in a total of forty-three minutes. She displayed excellent use of the reducter curse and the Disapuno anti-jinx. Although she received a small bite from a serpent, she did quite well over all. Her marks are as follows." I heard the announcer say, and I looked up at the stands.

There were five people judging us, apparently. The first two judges were people I didn't recognize, and the last three were the heads of the schools. The first person shot an 8 in the air. The second person, a woman, shot a 9. Then madam Maxime shot an 8 in the air. Dumbledore shot a 9 in the air. Finally, the Durmstrang headmaster shot a 6 in the air. I frowned slightly at the last score, but over all, my score was ok. It was 40 points that I just earned.

Next thing I knew, I was ushered into a tent to get my hand fixed. I hardly paid attention as she fixed my hand, I just wanted to get out there and see my friends and watch the rest of the task. The nurse had other ideas.

"You wait 'ere! You wait 'ere for one hour until your hand is healed!" She told me sternly as I tried to sneak out. I scowled at her and sat back down. I had to settle to just listening to the commentary.

I listening curiously for the hour I was to sit. Eric was next, and from what I could hear, he was actually really good. No body had ever talked to Eric, so nobody really knew much about him. He was really quiet, and from what I could here, incredibly gifted. I was positive that he would beat me. I just am not that good.

By the time I was let out of the hospital tent, Eric was just finishing up the end of his task. They wouldn't let me go up into the stands to see my friends, so I was stuck watching from right behind the judge's table. However annoyed I was, I was pleased to see that Eric was having a lot of trouble aiming his spells correctly. It took him quite a few tries and several extra minutes before he finally got the angle and knocked the box down.

When Eric was done, he looked up eagerly for his scores. I couldn't see them, for they were in front of me. I watched Eric's face. He didn't seem ecstatic about his score, but he seemed pleased all the same. When he was done reading the scores, they were showed to the rest of the crowd. I looked at them. The total was forty-one. I looked at my hands. So far I was in last place.

Next, Claire came out. I watched her with interest as she smiled at the crowd. Then, there was the boom. I looked down, and where Claire used to be, there was a glass house. From where I was sitting, I could see everything perfectly. Apparently the mirrors were see-through from the outside.

Claire was just as good as Eric, maybe even better. She didn't even hesitate to shrink the snakes or anything else. I looked at my hands. I couldn't help get the feeling that I was the serious underdog here. I was obviously the worst at magic.

Claire had very few slip-ups. She did shatter a mirror because she sent a spell that was to strong at one of them, and she did trip when something lunged at her, but other then that, her performance was perfect. She got the box down on her very first try, which made me feel like crap.

When Claire was finished, I looked at her face when she got her score. When I saw her face light up, I knew instantly that she must have got a good score. I followed everyone's gaze to the scoreboard as her scores were put up. She got forty-six points.

As everyone filed out of the arena, Dumbledore called me over to him.

"In the box your holding contains your next clue. The information on the next task will be sent to you when everyone from Hogwarts and Durmstrang leave, so Sunday night. If you have any questions, please come see me." Dumbledore told me, his eyes sparkling. I nodded at him.

As I left the Arena, I noticed Claire surrounded by the rest of Trellena. I kept walking. I didn't want them to see me. I wanted to find my own friends.

As I walked, the weight of what I was about to do returned. I had completely forgot about it when I saw my mom and found out she was pregnant. Now, the feeling returned. My mom and Dad went home, so I knew that I had no choice but to go find my friends. And David.

It took me a very long time to find them. They were out sitting on the grounds on some table out there. When I did find them, I was surprised.

"Kelsey! Your Hair!" I exclaimed when I saw her. She giggled happily. She had changed so much from the person I once knew and hated. Her hair was now really long, and it was pretty. It was brownish-red, and it looked nice. I told her so.

"You really think it looks nice?" She said, and I laughed and nodded.

Next I turned to the rest of the group none of them really looked that different. Except the new girl I didn't recognize. At least not at first.

"Tess?" I exclaimed. Boy, did she look different. Her hair was no longer long and full like it had been. It was chin-length and stringy. She was incredibly pale, and the clothes she had on were all black. The clothes, plus the dark make-up she had on, made her look even paler.

"Tess, what happened?" I asked her, and she sniffed. Everyone gazed uneasily at me.

"I'm not called Tess any more. They call me Teresa now." Tess said. I raised my eyebrows. I had never called her Teresa in my whole life, even though that is her real name.

"Why? What happened? Why did you change so much?" I asked her, and she sniffed again.

"I just needed a change, awright? Got a problem with it?" She said coldly, and I stepped back. I was not used to getting this kind of treatment from the sweet girl that used to be my best friend.

"No, I'm sorry." I said, feeling hurt.

Turning away and leaving Tess in her moodiness, I studied Tucker and Tyler. They seemed to be really good friends now, a lot better then they were when I left.

"Tess and I broke up." Tucker whispered to me softly, and I nodded. He looked rather unhappy, but he didn't look like he was suffering or anything.

"How is Ayla?" I asked Tyler, and he smiled.

"She is great. She really wanted to come and see you, but she said she had to some stuff back home. I think she had a detention. She says she promises she will be here next time." Tyler said, and I smiled.

Finally, I turned to David.

"Hey…" I said softly.

"Hey yourself." He said, and he stood up and leaned over to kiss me. I turned away.

"David, we need to talk." I said, my voice shaking.

_A/N: Okay, I need to ask you guys a favor. What do you think I should name Ginny's new baby? It can be any name you want, first and middle name. I want you guys to name it, and I will pick my favorite one. Remember, it's a girl. PLEASE GIVE ME NAMES!_


	29. Changes

A/N: Thank-you you my reviewers. Reviews really mean a lot to me on those days that I'm feeling down.

_Disclaimer: Do I really have to say it?_

_Dedication: In memory of my Aunt, who passed away on Thursday, January 12, 2006._

"What do we need to talk about?" David said, sounding, well, actually, he was sounding kind of cocky.

"C'mon. I need to talk to you alone." I said softly.

David stood up and followed me. He gave a kind of arrogant smile to the rest of my friends, but he followed me.

"So, babe, what do we need to talk about?" He said, and I couldn't help noticing that he was sounding less and less like David, or at least the David that I knew.

I was silent. David had never called me babe before, and I didn't like it. It wasn't like David to do something like that. He was the type to think up his own nickname, not the one that everyone else used.

We kept on walking for a long time. David stopped asking me questions after awhile, since I hadn't answered any of them. We finally stopped walking when we reached a bench far out in the grounds, where there was only a few people around. The only people I could see where Claire and the rest of the sixth year Trellena's, but they were far enough away so they couldn't hear us.

I sat on the bench and David sat next to me. I looked at him, but I couldn't face him, knowing what I was about to do. I quickly looked at my hands.

"David, I think…" I said, still looking at my hands. I couldn't finish my sentence. I never thought that doing this would be so hard. We were together around eleven months… a long time.

Finally, I looked up at him. His face looked curious, and thoughtful. I took a deep breath.

"David, I think we should break up." I said quickly.

"What do you mean, you think." David said, his eyes narrowing.

I knew from the second David said that, he was not going to make this easy for me. He was going to put me through as much pain as he could.

"I want to break up." I said, rephrasing my words.

"You want to break up? YOU WANT TO BREAK UP?" David said, standing up. He looked really angry now. I cowered down slightly, but I didn't change my mind.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WANT TO BREAK UP? I MADE YOU! WITHOUT ME, YOU ARE NOTHING!" David yelled at me. I cowered down a little more. He was just reaffirming my decision.

"Its over David." I said softly.

"OVER? OVER? YOU BITCH! WITHOUT ME-HELL, WITHOUT ME, YOU WOULD BE DEAD! YOU KNOW ITS TRUE. YOU LITTLE BITCH, YOU OWE ME LIFE. YOU CAN'T BREAK UP WITH ME!" David screamed at me.

I was crying by now. I partly realized that he was right. Without him, nobody would have found me outside the tower and I would be dead. That didn't mean that I would have to stay with him forever.

"ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT? IT IS OVER. I COULDN'T STAND TO BE WITH SOMEONE AS SELFISH AND BITCHY AND SUICIDAL AND AS UNCLEAN AS YOU. ITS OVER. WE'RE OVER. FOREVER. YOU HERE THAT, YOU ASS? I HATE YOU, I NEVER LOVED YOU, WE ARE OVER!" David yelled so loud my ears were popping.

I was sobbing. David started walking toward me, for he had paced away a bit in his screaming fit. I thought he was going to hit me. I cowered down even more.

"Leave her alone." Said a voice from behind me. I turned around a little. Chris was standing there. He looked really angry.

"Excuse me pretty boy?" David snapped.

"I said leave her alone." Chris repeated, and he stepped forward.

"And what are you going to do if I wont leave her alone?" David taunted, and he pointed his wand at me and flicked it, and instantly I was immobile. He had used a non-verbal spell.

By now, I was so scared. David had never been like this before, and it was scaring me. I had never seen this mean side of David. Now I was glad I broke up with him, but still, I was the one who couldn't move and David was the one with the wand. I only had Chris to defend me.

Chris shouted something that I couldn't hear, and next thing I knew, David was frozen as well. Chris ran over to me and unfroze me.

"Are you okay Lily?" He asked, sounding really worried.

"I think so." I said, getting up from the bench. My legs shook when I stood on them. Chris pulled me back into a sitting position. Then he looked at me.

"Did you hear our whole fight?" I asked, and he nodded.

"What did he mean by you being unclean and suicidal?" Chris asked, and I looked away. That was exactly the question that I was afraid would come up. The one-year anniversary of the rape had came and went, I had forgotten about it, or at least almost. David saying that brought it all back into memory. Same with my little dark period of depression. He was stupid, David was… but he still made me feel like crap.

"Trust me, you don't want to know about my past." I told him, and Chris shrugged.

"Come on, it can't be worse then my past." He told me.

"Oh yes, it can. Trust me, it can." I told him.

He studied me for a moment, as if he was trying to analyze what I was thinking.

"Alright, but tell me when you are ready." He said softly. I nodded.

I had forgotten that David was frozen behind us. At least until I turned around and he was right there behind me.

"You're going to be sorry Lily. You are nothing, _nothing, _without me. You'll see. When you come crying back to me, saying you made a mistake, I wont be there, and then you will be the one with the broken heart." David said in a deadly whisper. It freaked me out so much that I could feel tears welling up again.

Chris pulled out his wand, but David was already walking away, back to the castle. He didn't head back to the tree where everyone was sitting.

After watching David walk away, he turned back and looked at me.

"Don't cry, Lily. Its alright." He said softly.

I just shook my head. Chris gave me a hug, and I cried into his shoulder for a minute. If I would have been younger, say, last year, I would have cried for an hour at least. I think that me only crying for a minute was showing how much older I was getting, how much more mature.

"I'm going to go back to my friends now, okay?" I told him, and he nodded.

"Are you sure your going to be okay? Do you want me to walk you over there?" He asked, actually sounding worried.

"No, that's ok. I'm fine. I'll see you later, ok?" I told him, and he nodded and walked back toward the rest of his friends, and I walked toward mine.

As I walked back to where my friends were, I pondered everything that had just happened. David and I had broken up. For real this time. I never thought that it would happen. I could never have imagined that it would happen that way. Then I thought about Chris. Chris telling me to give him a chance. I wondered if that offer still stood.

"Hey Lily! What happened?" Tyler called to me as I approached them.

"David and I are over. I really don't want to talk about it." I said, and everyone looked at me. I ignored the stared and sat down between Kelsey and Tyler.

Matt had joined the group while I was gone, and I smiled at him. Today, I noticed how much he actually looked like David. I know he is David's twin and all, but I never really thought of them as twins. At least, until now, when David was the last thing that I wanted on my mind.

I looked over at Tess. She just looked so… different. So sad. I wanted to ask her what happened, but I was afraid she would get mad. She wasn't the Tess I used to know, and I had no idea what happened. Finally, I looked at Kelsey.

"Hey Kelse, want to take a walk with me?" I asked her, and she looked at me for a second. I raised my eyebrows then jerked my head toward Tess.

"Oh! Sure." She said, and she stood up and followed me. I was getting pretty tired of walking places to talk, but I needed to know what was going on with Tess.

"What happened to her? She is and Emo-Goth freak now." I said, and Kelsey nodded.

"Well, I really don't know. You left, and she started getting kind of moody. I think that she was lonely because she really had no one to talk to. She and I aren't really the best of friends. Anyway, you've been gone three or four weeks, right? Well, about three weeks ago, a couple nights after you left, she snuck out to Hogsmade. She got a fake ID somewhere and she is going to the club there, Cauldron. She has been doing that every night for the past night, every night coming back either drunk, stoned, or sometimes both. Tucker finally broke up with her last week." Kelsey said.

My mouth was hanging open. This sounded nothing like the sweet Tess I knew. I looked over at her. We walked pretty far away, but I could see her in the distance. She looked so sad, but so angry. Like she was angry at the world. I glanced at Kelsey, who shrugged.

"So how are things with you and Matt?" I asked, trying to change the subject to a lighter one.

Kelsey shrugged. "We are good I guess. He has changed a lot from the immature little kid he was at the beginning of last year, don't you think?" Kelsey said softly, and I nodded.

"You have changed a lot to, Kelse. You have gone from being a preppy girl a lot people hated to someone that everyone likes." I said softly.

"I'm sorry Lily… For being so mean to you." She said.

"I'm sorry to." I said back, and we glanced at each other.

"Want to head back?" Kelsey said, and I nodded. I was tired of talking to one person at a time, and I wanted to be back around my old group of friends, no matter how different that some of them got.

As we approached the group of people again, I noticed that Tess had left, and Tyler had gone to sit with his Ravenclaw friends. Kelsey went over to Matt, so it left just me and Tucker. So much for being in a group of friends.

"Hey, you want to meet my other friends? The ones that I have made here?" I asked Tucker. He nodded, so we made our way over to the group of Trellena's.

"Hey guys." I said, and they all looked at me. They fell silent. I looked at Chris, and he shrugged. He had went and told them all what happened, I knew he did. I didn't mind. Much.

"Hey Lily… Hang in there, okay? That David kid was a jerk, we could hear him yelling at you all the way over here." Claire said, coming over and giving me a hug.

I smiled at all of them. Tucker looked a little out of place. I forgot that he had come with me, so I quickly introduced him. He smiled a little nervously at first, but soon he was chatting with all of them like a group of old friends.

I watched them all talking and laughing, but I couldn't get myself to join them. David had just put me in such a horrible mood that there was nothing that could make me happy.

"Hey Lily." Chris said, coming over to me.

"Hey." I said, staring off into the distance.

"C'mon, let's go inside, get something to eat. Take your mind off that scumbag." I looked at Chris.

"You know, I think that is exactly what I need." I said, and we walked off to the castle.

A/N: Please review. I'm still looking for names. I think I have a name, but if you guys can think of a better one, go for it. I'm thinking of the name Elizabeth Riley Potter. If you have a better one, please let me know.


	30. Chris

_A/N: To all my Fans._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter_

Dedication: To Josh… for making me want to cry, laugh and punch him in the face all at one time. Oh, and for those of you who said that was really out of character for David-my cousin had that happen to her. Ok, so that was based off a real life situation, so I was just replaying it, so yes, people can actually act like that.

At the end of the weekend, I was kind of glad that my Hogwarts friends left. I hardly talked to Tess, and the whole thing with David put me in a pretty bad mood. The only person that I wished would stay was Kelsey. The rest of them I couldn't care less, even the ones I did like.

"I'll see you in February." I said tearfully, and I hugged Kelsey good-bye. She smiled to, and then she turned around to get going. I watched her walk out of the castle; I couldn't help feel an amazing wave of homesickness wash over me. I loved it here, but I couldn't help miss Hogwarts and everything about it.

I trudged back up to my dorm. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I was in such a bad mood about the whole break-up that I wanted nothing to do with no one. I trudged up to my bed and laid in it.

I laid there for a while, until I heard people coming up the stairs. When I heard them, I quickly rolled off my bed and under it. I didn't feel like talking yet.

"She is all depressed. Can you believe the way her boyfriend yelled at her?" I heard Claire say.

"I know. Poor Lily. Did you hear Chris talk about what he was going to do if that David kid bothered her again?" I heard someone else say, and I guessed it was Ella. I listened closer.

"Ya, why does he like Lily so much anyways? Oh, here is my quill. Lets go." Claire said, and I heard the door slam.

So Chris did like me an awful lot… I thought he only liked me as a little crush. I rolled out from under my bed. Getting up, I looked down and saw a piece of paper. I picked it up. I looked at it for a second, and all of a sudden a flashback came: A piece of paper falling under my bed, and me not picking it up because I was so excited about the clue to the task.

I bent down and picked it up. I unfolded it carefully, scared of what might be in it. It was a letter. With a jolt I realized that it was from Tess.

Dear Lily, I miss you so much. I am so depressed without my best friend here to comfort me. My parents no longer wish for me to continue my magical education, so they gave me the option to either stop or I cant live there anymore. I chose to stay at Hogwarts, so I no longer have a home. I am so depressed. You are the only one I am going to tell because you are the only one who I know can help. Please Lily, try and do something so I can be happy again. Always, Tess.

"Wow." I thought. Tess's parents were always a little nervous of magic, but not allowing her to go to school? That was something.

I got up slowly. I felt kind of weird. I was all upset because I had broken up with my boyfriend and he called me some names because he was so mad. Tess had a much bigger problem: she needed somewhere to live. I felt so bad. I picked up a quill, and I wrote Tess a letter back saying I just found the note, and as many words of comfort as I could. Now I needed an owl.

I left my room and went down to the common room. Most of the people in Trellena were there. I gave them a small smile, and I continued on my way. Chris jumped up to walk with me.

"Where are you headed?" Chris asked softly, and I shrugged at him. I wasn't in the mood to have someone to talk to. I needed to think about what I was going to do about Tess.

"Owlery." I said, not looking at him. In a way, he was a reminder of what had happened with David, and I did not need reminding of that now. I kept walking, but soon I realized I forgot the way. I had only sent a few letters, and I couldn't remember which way to go. I looked helplessly at Chris.

"This way." He said, and he pointed down the hallway opposite what I was going to choose. I hurried down it, hoping that Chris would not follow me. Of course, no such luck. He hurried after me.

"Lily! Slow down!" He said as I sped up even more. I didn't slow down, but he caught up with me.

"Lily, what's the matter? Why are you walking so fast? Did I do something and you don't want to walk with me?" Chris sounded so sincere, so worried that something was really wrong, that I found myself spilling the whole thing about Tess to him.

"Wow… That's… interesting. And you think you can help?" Chris asked. I shrugged. "More like I hope I can help…" I said sadly.

"Listen Lily, stop beating yourself up. It isn't your fault. I know you think it's your fault this happened to Tess, but really, Lily, It isn't." Chris said softly.

I looked at him and shook my head. "I have to get to the Owlery…" I said, and I started walking again. Chris didn't turn around, he kept up with me. Soon, I was at the Owlery. I sent of my letter, and still Chris waited for me.

"Why are you waiting for me? I mean, not that I don't want you to, but why are you waiting? You don't have to…" I asked him, curious.

"Because I think you need someone to wait for you right now." He said simply, and I sighed.

"Okay…" I said softly, and we made our way back.

When we got back, I quickly went up to my dorm. When I got up there, the box that had the clue in it started vibrating. Alarmed, I approached it cautiously. I opened it, and a piece of paper flew out. I grabbed it, and I checked what it said. **Next task: February 26, 2:00 PM**

* * *

Time went by fairly quickly. Tess wouldn't write back, but I kept writing her over and over again, and she still wouldn't right back. My moods improved slowly, and by the time of the last day of term, I was in a very good mood.

"Claire, Lily, please stay after." My transfiguration teacher said at the end of our last class on the last day of term. Clair and I glanced at each other and shrugged as the rest of the class shuffled out.

"Okay, as I assume both of you know, we will be hosting a Yule ball. Fourth years and up will be coming, if they wish, from the other schools. You two will be required to get a dance partner, for the champions open the ball with a dance." She told us.

I glanced at my hand. I knew we needed a partner, but I hadn't gotten one yet. Claire did, however.

I nodded at the teacher. She gave as a few other things we needed to know, and then we hurried out.

"You have a date Lily?" Claire asked me, and I shook my head.

"Oh, you should totally go with Chris then, since he doesn't have a date either."

"Really? He doesn't? What about that girl he was talking to earlier? I heard her ask him." I said. That was why I didn't have someone to go with, because I thought that Chris was taken.

"He turned her down. He is hoping that you will ask him. Come on Lily, he already thinks that you aren't going to ask him, that you don't like him. Why do you think that he is so sad lately- Lily, where are you going?" Claire called to me retreating back.

"To find Chris!" I called back.

I hurried down the hallway, looking for him everywhere. I was afraid that I had waited to long, and either he wasn't going or he found someone else to go with. I looked in the library, the Owlery, the dining hall. Then I remember him saying something to Claire's date about going up to the dorms.

I almost sprinted up there. I couldn't believe that I had waited this long to ask him. I burst through the door of the common room, and looked wildly around for him. I spotted him, and he was talking to another girl. My heart dropped she playfully punched him on the shoulder. I figured she had asked him first and I wasn't going to embarrass myself. I trudged away, feeling defeat. Then I heard a shout behind me.

"Oy! Lily! Come here. There is someone I want you to meet." Chris called to me.

I turned around and slowly walked over there, knowing that he was going to introduce me to the person he was going to the ball with.

"Lily, this is my little sister Jessica. She is in fifth year." Chris said, and I laughed.

"What's so funny about that?" Chris asked, and I just shook my head. I couldn't believe that I hadn't realized it before. Once I got close to them, they looked so much alike that they could be twins, even though Chris was a year older.

"Chris, I have something I need to ask you… In private." I said, and Chris got up and followed me to a corner of the room.

"What's up?" He said, looking slightly puzzled.

"Chris…" I began, taking a deep breath. I had no idea this was going to be this hard.

"Chrisdoyouwanttogototheballwithme?" I asked in a rush.

"What?" Chris said, looking even more confused

"Do you want to… to go to the ball with me?" I asked, slower and understandable this time.

Chris relaxed and smiled, which sent shivers up my spine.

"Sure, of course I'll go with you. Christmas night, right?" Chris said, and I nodded. I was just relieved that I had said it and he had said yes, not just laughed in my face.

Since the next day was Christmas Eve, we had a day in Batille, the local wizard village. It was quite fun. I went with Sirius and Ella, who had become a couple, Claire and her date, Ryan, and Chris. Chris was basically my date, but I didn't really want to hole hands or anything, as the other two couples did. I was perfectly content with just walking next to each other.

I got the last of my Christmas shopping done. I got presents for my family, since I already had presents for my friends. I got my mom's baby a little sleeper and some cute little clothes. I was so happy that my mom was having a girl. Plus, my mom had told me that I would have the privilege of naming her, but Molly had to agree. Either way, it was awesome.

As we walked around, we ended up splitting up a bit. Well, more like Chris and I split from them. They went into this little coffee shop, which was basically for couples, and Chris and me went to The Two Cauldrons, a popular pub.

"Listen Lily, I have something to ask you now. Would you like to be my girlfriend?" Chris asked, sounding excited, nervous, hopeful and scared all at the same time.

I didn't answer right away, so Chris started to apologize, saying he was sorry and if I didn't want to be that's ok and stuff like that.

Finally, I looked at him. "Chris, its not that… Just before we even can think about getting together, you need to know about my past…" I said softly, and sadly.

_A/N: Finally, a chapter! Sorry it took so long, but here it is. The next chapter will probably be up in maybe two weeks, give or take a little... Please review, and please tell me good names because I kind of forgot all the old ones. Thanks!_


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